# Want a really wacky compliment? Go surreal with the help of this site! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 27, 2002, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932 "2002-04-27T07:23:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/1 "2002-04-27T07:23:17Z")
If you do, then go to [the Surrealist Compliment Generator](http://www.madsci.org/cgi-bin/cgiwrap/~lynn/jardin/SCG). It’s a site that basically gives you a lot of surreal “compliments”… the reason why the word “compliments” is in quotes is that some of the sentences it spews out don’t even sound like they could be compliments by any stretch of the imagination! (some of them are in foreign languages) Post what you get from the site… it’ll be interesting to see what we all get! I wouldn’t call it an experiment, per se, but certainly very interesting. (no, my brain cannot think of alternative words at this hour; it’s almost 12:30 and I should get to bed soon) On my most recent visit, I got this: > [@](#): > > BUY WAR BONDS Doesn’t even sound like a compliment, does it? I guess that’s what surrealism is all about… someone care to enlighten me? Just in case you’re worried, this site does generate stuff that maybe _could_ be construed as a compliment… for example: > [@](#): > > Troglodyte kidneys measure your eyes in sardonic spasms not unlike the movements of an albatross buried in creosote. Very confusing “compliment”… see what I mean? Weird stuff, which is what I happen to like! Remembe, enlighten the rest of us by telling what you got from the site! (duplicates don’t really matter, I suppose) ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/2 "2002-04-27T07:26:53Z")
> [@](#): > > Your fingers sublimate into volcanic gases with the slightest cooling touch from the antennae of a passing lyre. > [@](#): > > Din nese overger kun din haltende underleppe! > [@](#): > > Many sausages have known things before you had time to react. I like the third one best. ---
**Author:** ![meyer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ccd318/32.png) [@meyer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meyer)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/3 "2002-04-27T11:37:43Z")
First try: > [@](#): > > Your hair sends forth a sheen remniscent of a wounded man streaming bandage gauze from the highest church steeple. Hmmm. Okay, again: > [@](#): > > Your eyes show as many deep and full shades of blue as a healing bruise upon an injured forelimb. I sense an injury theme here. Huh. One more time: > [@](#): > > I should welcome flagellation by your ovoviviparous torso. Okay, thats it, I give up! ---
**Author:** ![Skijumper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3e96dc/32.png) [@Skijumper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skijumper)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/4 "2002-04-27T12:58:28Z")
“Your Cerebral Hematoma requires me to congratulate you on your ability to compute the Lesbian Integral of a macaroon.” and then… “You move with the eloquence of a fiery wall of disintegrating fuselage.” “Your skin emanates such a porcelain sheen that I am tempted to stamp WC across your bosom and under your armpits.” ooh! Looks like I’ve got my pickup lines for tonight… “Your face is like an imperfectly shaven tennis ball.” Then again. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/5 "2002-04-27T13:03:32Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh!, how you inflict me with wounds of paranoia and desire. …I kinda’ like it… ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/6 "2002-04-27T13:06:40Z")
Hmmm… _"Your eyes are much like milky pools of pantyhose. " “Where it not for the dizzy whiptail ambivalence of your crumbling fleece, I could never contemplate the ways of so many merchant bankers in heat.”_ (Whoa, that was long.) _“Suffer, for you are toasting the Marzipan!.. (…and may I upon pretense ring latent tintinabulations for your Andalusian raisins!)”_ WTF? _“Your elbow patches rumble with a fear reminiscent of mayonnaise sidecars cradled in scotchguard.”_ Very surreal… ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/7 "2002-04-27T13:09:29Z")
> [@](#): > > Sir, you have most exquisite breasts. Actually, that’s true… ---
**Author:** ![pookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ebca7d/32.png) [@pookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pookie)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/8 "2002-04-27T13:19:36Z")
Your face is like an imperfectly shaven tennis ball. A legion of French Bosoms could not match the lucid beauty of your toenails! If you were a camel your humps would be esoterically bald from overuse. Your Hands do the work of 10,000 highly trained lesbian jumping beans. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/9 "2002-04-27T13:22:35Z")
> [@](#): > > How can I help but use your eyes as a means for self-asphyxiation? > [@](#): > > Woe is me, for I must forever more huddle, unminded, in the dark shadow of thine undeserved engine of procreation. Undeserved engine of procreation? Ok, if you say so. > [@](#): > > I should welcome flagellation by your ovoviviparous torso Am I wrong or does this one mean “I’d like to be whipped by your egg-laying chest”? ---
**Author:** ![snermy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@snermy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snermy)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/10 "2002-04-27T13:27:25Z")
“If I were to combine your blood, toes, and hair, it might not be you, but it would be enough for my basic desires.” Damn, that’s deep ---
**Author:** ![LeeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ee7513/32.png) [@LeeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LeeJam)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/11 "2002-04-27T13:33:34Z")
How about this one??? “Come, let me gnaw your fingernails that I may absorb and lose myself in the wise and gritty detritus that is you.” ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/12 "2002-04-27T13:45:09Z")
"The dimples of your breasts do pucker evocatively when you smile. " "The quietness of a manhole cover cannot compare with the wild vapours of nylon I sense in your larynx. " ---
**Author:** ![grettle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@grettle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grettle)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/13 "2002-04-27T15:15:49Z")
“Though I may never see you again, I wish you the warmest clam chowder, the finest of embalmings, and the best in stainless steel cadaver pans that money can buy.” that brightened my day. . . . . ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/14 "2002-04-27T15:23:10Z")
"Woods nymphs sprinkle your path with bowlings balls while you dance and prowl in the sequined moonlight with leftover heads of lettuce. " ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/15 "2002-04-27T15:23:17Z")
> [@](#): > > You are the Ayatollah of Confusion on the night of Divalí. Well, that’s true, actually… ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/16 "2002-04-27T16:28:07Z")
“You mutter such objects of equine delight, while in a basket of hounds and toes, that the mind’s ability to sew together slices of mordant ivory becomes tamed with visions of Tamils in Constantinople.” Great, now I’m going to have a nightmare about a basket of hounds and toes… ---
**Author:** ![Rosebud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rosebud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rosebud)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/17 "2002-04-27T17:05:31Z")
Your mucous membranes glisten with the glow of forty-seven burning violins. Um… ouch? ---
**Author:** ![pendgwen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3da27b/32.png) [@pendgwen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pendgwen)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/18 "2002-04-27T17:17:59Z")
“May you always be as vivid as your hallucinations.” Well, seeing as how I’ve never has hallucinations I guess that makes me pretty dull. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/19 "2002-04-27T17:28:35Z")
I got: > [@](#): > > Your nose hair is pleasingly twisted with the roots of a bristlecone pine that is so precariously perched on the side of a cliff it may easily uproot and fall upon the Republican lobbyists below. Um… thanks, I guess…? > [@](#): > > Garbage bins would be seventh with ivy to hold your face under a stone. Does that mean that garbage bins and ivy would be acceptable things to practically kill myself with a huge stone? > [@](#): > > I see your loves in cloves. Seeing reflections in cloves? Sounds weird to me… > [@](#): > > Your teeth are as soft as liquid stones poured from an aquamarine vase of solidifying flesh. Liquid stones, eh? > [@](#): > > I must demand your pleasing chin! How it passes there and back again like a leopard searching for its misplaced frontal lobes. Hmmm… didn’t know that my chin and a leopard’s frontal lobes were related. > [@](#): > > I find your eye sockets to be a wondrous amusement park filled with neo-plastic pleasures and oncogenic delights. So does that mean my eye sockets are fake? > [@](#): > > Dear David, > Never was a man so badly meant to wear corrective glasses. Somehow, I can’t see this as a compliment… “You need to wear corrective glasses REALLY badly” doesn’t sound like one to me, at any rate. > [@](#): > > Soft sausages would gladly procreate in the bathwater of your verisimilitude. Sausages procreating in the bathwater of my appearing to be real? Works for me, I guess… > [@](#): > > You have no socially redeeming value. Now THAT is no compliment, and no mistake about it! (though it sounds like something my brother might say as a joke to our friends…) > [@](#): > > Your dandruff falls like the fixtures within a scenic railway passing through a thousand bearded rainbows… Hmm… is that good or bad? > [@](#): > > Les caresses de tes yeux fertiles sont plus douces que toutes les gifles de tes mains rouilies. Soft, fertile eye caresses? Hmm… someone care to translate the rest of this? > [@](#): > > You mutter such objects of equine delight, while in a basket of hounds and toes, that the mind’s ability to sew together slices of mordant ivory becomes tamed with visions of Tamils in Constantinople. Horses, Tamils, biting ivory, a basket of hounds and toes… yup, makes sense to me! 😛 > [@](#): > > Madam, what a handsome moustashe you wear! Thanks… I always thought I looked dashing with a mustache. 😛 > [@](#): > > La sola visione dei tuoi magnifici occhi mi fanno diventare ottimista per tutto cio’ che riguarda la mia vita. Translation help, anyone? All I can make out is “my life” and “magnificent”. > [@](#): > > Solitamente, quando emani profumi, mi ricordi lamette circonflesse. THis one is even worse for me, translation-wise! I can’t understand any of it except “my”! (at least, that’s what I think it is…) > [@](#): > > Tribes of primitve hunters, with rhinestone codpieces rampant, should build pyra mids of Chevy engines covered in butterscotch syrup to exalt the diastolic, inef fable, scintillated and cacophonous salamander of truth which slimes and distracts from each and every orifice of your holy refrigerator, Sears be its brand. This is a long, incomprehensible one… rhinestone codpieces… hehehe… > [@](#): > > Madame, your implement is admonishing me! Oh, and since when do I have an “implement”, so to speak? 😛 > [@](#): > > Your arms lengthen daily like the edges of a festering table. Good to know… now I can go to the doctor with a Web diagnosis. > [@](#): > > The sisters of Catherine the Great ask that you cover yourself with lightbulb filaments and take pains to make yourself fully incandescent this evening. Did Catherine the Great have any sisters? Just wondering… > [@](#): > > Soon we will be together, writhing profitably on a bed of non-seasonal vegetables in equine bliss. With this vision I see no reason why the operation to remove a 2.2kg uneviscerated turket carcass from my pericardium should fail. There’s that horse theme again, this time with vegetables and turkey… > [@](#): > > Vos lobes d’orreilles sont comme les tetes des poissons en hiver. My earlobes are like fish heads in winter? Ooooookkkkkaaaaayy… > [@](#): > > La pluie de vos insultes n’atteint pas le parapluie de mon indifference. The umbrella of your indifference, eh? Well, I guess I know where we stand… > [@](#): > > You are the swordfish that will never shower. I’m not sure that swordfish NEED to shower, strictly speaking… don’t they live in the ocean? > [@](#): > > Never pet your dog when it is on fire. That goes without saying. > [@](#): > > An ocean-going tin of crosseyed mussels could never match the melodious burblings of your sister’s husband. Well, considering that I don’t have a brother-in-law yet (my sister being only 19, after all), I’ll keep that in mind for future reference, thanks. > [@](#): > > Bleed me! My memory is fried with your pork! I sit really? I guess that’s a good thing… ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932/20 "2002-04-27T18:45:08Z")
“Oh how my pathological scar desires to read poems through the ruddied girth of your soul.” Great. Even my soul is fat “Your moist towelette speaks to me in leather as the disgruntled post man listens attentively in Yiddish while pumping the iron pumpkin of the mini-van” I have no idea what to say except that I’m pretty sure ‘pumping the iron pumpkin of the mini-van’ will make you go blind. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-really-wacky-compliment-go-surreal-with-the-help-of-this-site/105932.md?page=2)