# Want to piss me off as a dominos driver? Order 2 mediums... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 12, 2020, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355 "2020-03-12T18:44:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/21 "2020-03-12T19:38:11Z")
All I know is that when I was a Domino’s driver 30 years ago, I was ALWAYS pissed off, and it didn’t have anything to do with what size pizzas people ordered. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/22 "2020-03-12T19:39:38Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > … So i have to carry two medium sized boxes that shift in the pizza warmer box and sometimes get smashed making the toppings come off the pizza. . As a former pizza delivery guy, I can say unequivocally, you’re doing it wrong. I could stack four pizzas and not have this problem. Jeesh ---
**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/23 "2020-03-12T19:42:04Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > …instead of 1 large. These dumbasses do it all the time because of a 2 for 5.99 deal. So i have to carry two medium sized boxes that shift in the pizza warmer box and sometimes get smashed making the toppings come off the pizza. Then these moronic bitches call the store to complain because they know I would crush them if they gave me lip at their door. > > Just order a large pizza and do half toppings on one side, half on the other. It’s not rocket science and it’s easier to deliver. What do you do when someone orders two large pizzas? Punch them out? If you can’t transport two pizzas without smashing them, you need to be retrained, though it sounds like you and your customers would be better off if you found a different job. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/24 "2020-03-12T19:48:22Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > …instead of 1 large. These dumbasses do it all the time because of a 2 for 5.99 deal. So i have to carry two medium sized boxes that shift in the pizza warmer box and sometimes get smashed making the toppings come off the pizza. Then these moronic bitches call the store to complain because they know I would crush them if they gave me lip at their door. > > Just order a large pizza and do half toppings on one side, half on the other. It’s not rocket science and it’s easier to deliver. It’s also roughly $2.75 dollars more. Two medium 2 topping $5.99 pizzas equal roughly $12.00. Per dominoes website, one large 2 toppng pizza is roughly $14.75. Plus, as others have demonstrated, you get a ton less pizza with one large then two mediums. So you are asking me to pay more for less pizza so the Plus, as others have demonstrated, you get a ton less pizza with one large then two mediums. So you are asking me to pay more for less pizza so that things are slightly more convenient for you. I think you’re kind of missing the point of both economics and what your job is. Hint: neither are rocket science. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/25 "2020-03-12T19:51:27Z")
Incidentally, (3/2)^2 = 9/4 \>2 so one 18" is larger than two 12", although not by a lot. But two 12" are considerably larger than one 14" since (7/6)^2 is only 49/36 considerably less than 2. I think the OP is in the wrong business since he blames the customer for getting the best deal and also for complaining about his incompetence. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/26 "2020-03-12T19:53:54Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > It’s not rocket science Neither is being a pizza delivery boy, apparently. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/27 "2020-03-12T20:04:41Z")
Also, Asuka, glad to see that [your earlier pizza-delivery concern](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=799350) didn’t deter you from taking it up as a career. Do you have a partner for deliveries to difficult areas? ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/28 "2020-03-12T20:09:38Z")
'Scuse me, but pie r not square, pie r ROUND! Harumph! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/29 "2020-03-12T20:10:19Z")
So what I’m getting from this is if I want to order pizza, if I order from Domino’s I need to choose to pay more for less pizza to make my driver happier? How about if I use my money to make myself happy and order what I want to order from Papa John’s instead? Seriously, OP, what are you doing that is causing this to be a constant problem for you? I order pizza a couple times a month and for the most part, all of the pizzas have arrived with all of the toppings where they should be. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/30 "2020-03-12T20:14:36Z")
When I order Domino’s I go for the pickup because that means I get my pizza in about 15-20 minutes instead of 45-60 minutes, and it will be hot when I get it home. I usually order two mediums because if I’m ordering pizza it’s probably because my BFF is over and we have wildly different ideas of what constitutes a proper pizza. Amazingly enough, in probably fifty pickups I have never managed to fuck over any of my pizzas in any way and I don’t even HAVE a warmer box in my vehicle, I just put them on the passenger seat all higgledy piggledy. Guess it takes a professional pizza delivery person to fuck up two mediums, I’m obviously unqualified since I always bring home perfectly fine pizzas with zero damage. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/31 "2020-03-12T20:17:57Z")
this is one-time you’re going to be told to “suck it up buttercup” because dominos has had that deal for 11 years (it was a response to the recession in 08) and isn’t going anywhere anytime soon and it’s what pretty much keeps them in the delivery business I even asked here on the sdmb if there was a way to wean people off of the deal back in 11 or 12 and the answer was yes but very slowly and might take a year or three so if that pisses you off well might be time to rethink that employment choice ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/32 "2020-03-12T20:18:06Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > Seriously, OP, what are you doing that is causing this to be a constant problem for you? [My theory.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4HquQ0DO1U) ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/33 "2020-03-12T20:18:53Z")
> [@nelliebly](#): > > What do you do when someone orders two large pizzas? Punch them out? And you thought the calls to the store about smushed pizzas were bad… ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/34 "2020-03-12T20:40:18Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > 'Scuse me, but pie r not square, pie r ROUND! Harumph! 😃 Well… except in Detroit. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/35 "2020-03-12T20:51:54Z")
Crush them? OMG, another internet tough guy. And what pray-tell would keep you from just talking it out professionally and maturely? ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/36 "2020-03-12T20:57:45Z")
How do you feel about 1 medium and 1 large? This thread is comedy gold! ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/37 "2020-03-12T20:59:56Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > How do you feel about 1 medium and 1 large? > > This thread is comedy gold! I can’t believe I still remember this almost 4 decades later: Always put the smaller box on the bottom. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/38 "2020-03-12T21:03:56Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > [My theory.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4HquQ0DO1U) Lol. Never seen that commercial, but that indeed is what ran through my head upon reading the OP. I mean, what kind of G forces are you pulling in your delivery vehicle that you can’t get a goddamned pizza intact from point A to point B? ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/39 "2020-03-12T21:13:29Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > How do you feel about 1 medium and 1 large? > > This thread is comedy gold! The medium boxes slide in the pizza sleeve. I can’t hold onto them when driving. The sleeves are made for large boxes. ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2020, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355/40 "2020-03-12T21:23:07Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > The medium boxes slide in the pizza sleeve. I can’t hold onto them when driving. The sleeves are made for large boxes. Can you create some sort of shimming system with old bread sticks? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-piss-me-off-as-a-dominos-driver-order-2-mediums/849355.md?page=3)