# Want to see Rasputin's severed dork in a jar? (No, I'm not kidding) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 15, 2004, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512 "2004-06-15T18:21:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/1 "2004-06-15T18:21:31Z")
[Not safe for work, probably](http://iol.co.za/index.php?click_id=29&art_id=qw1087042684705A141&set_id=1) :eek: The rumors were true! ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/2 "2004-06-15T18:30:06Z")
I’d have to call him “little fella”! 😉 * * * Rulers have 12 inches. Legends have 14. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/3 "2004-06-15T18:33:18Z")
Don’t walk by that thing with a bag of peanuts. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/4 "2004-06-15T18:38:28Z")
I already have a thread on this going in MPSIMS [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=261563](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=261563) Lieu, your comment here is definitely the funniest thing I’ve read all day…possibly all week. ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/5 "2004-06-15T18:50:54Z")
You sure that wasn’t from Catherine the Great’s horse instead? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/6 "2004-06-15T18:53:50Z")
Sorry, **kalhoun**. I scrolled through MPSIMS to see if anyone had posted it yet but your thread title didn’t tip me off. I think actual horses are clicking on this picture and feeling inadequate. ---
**Author:** ![Scarf-Ace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Scarf-Ace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarf-Ace)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/7 "2004-06-15T19:32:24Z")
I wonder if the glass magnifies it… ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/8 "2004-06-15T21:13:45Z")
> [@Meta-Gumble](#): > > I wonder if the glass magnifies it… and in the article they said it _shrank_ from whatever pickle juice it is floating in :eek: All I know is I wouldn’t want that thing headed for my nether regions … size is one thing, but that thing is just dangerous - it might poke someone’s eye out… ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/9 "2004-06-15T21:25:37Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > that thing is just dangerous - it might poke someone’s eye out… … from the inside! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Shaolinrabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Shaolinrabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shaolinrabbit)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/10 "2004-06-15T21:50:12Z")
Now, how did you know it was going to be huge? I mean, with a name like Rasputin it just had to be. Didn’t he get drunk once and wave it at a crowd of people? ---
**Author:** ![Jpeg\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/4bbf92/32.png) [@Jpeg\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jpeg_Jones)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/11 "2004-06-15T21:58:24Z")
The picture won’t load. Maybe they took it down. ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/12 "2004-06-15T23:07:36Z")
I like that story. It proves that a guy can be as powerful and influential as Rasputin even if he isn’t as well-endowed as the rest of us. Good on you, little guy! (And I’m ashamed to say I don’t get the peanuts joke.) ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/13 "2004-06-15T23:12:15Z")
> [@SolGrundy](#): > > (And I’m ashamed to say I don’t get the peanuts joke.) I think the inferrence is that it’s like an elephant’s trunk. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/14 "2004-06-15T23:14:39Z")
I have a good friend who was married to a guy like that. She said he had an 11" penis, but I divorced him _anyway_! (And possibly TMI, but she said it looked like two beer cans stuck together.) ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/15 "2004-06-15T23:26:56Z")
I want a pickle. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/16 "2004-06-15T23:31:46Z")
Rah Rah! ---
**Author:** ![MidnightRadio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@MidnightRadio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MidnightRadio)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/17 "2004-06-15T23:38:06Z")
I don’t know why the picture won’t load, but [here](http://www.mosnews.com/files/1492/picture1.jpg) it is from another site. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/18 "2004-06-16T00:25:21Z")
I’m surprised it dodn’t end up in the [Icelandic Phallological Museum](http://www.ismennt.is/not/phallus/ens.htm) > [@](#): > > The Icelandic Phallological Museum is probably the only museum in the world to contain a collection of phallic specimens belonging to all the various types of mammal found in a single country. > Phallology is an ancient science which, until recent years, has received very little attention in Iceland, except as a borderline field of study in other academic disciplines such as history, art, psychology, literature and other artistic fields like music and ballet. > Now, thanks to The Icelandic Phallological Museum, it is finally possible for individuals to undertake serious study into the field of phallology in an organized, scientific fashion. ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/19 "2004-06-16T00:42:47Z")
> [@MidnightRadio](#): > > I don’t know why the picture won’t load, but [here](http://www.mosnews.com/files/1492/picture1.jpg) it is from another site. Why do all the pictures of that thing include a comely female gazing contempatively at it, completely unmoved as if it were a rather normal specimen, and not at all horriffic to see in a context of _a freakin’ glass jar_? Furthermore, if it were a man gazing at a specimen of a female mammary organs in a jar, don’t you think there would be some claims of misogyny coming from the crackpot corners of society? (And don’t doubt for a second that if such a photograph existed, the look on the man’s face would clearly express the thoughts “Jeebus H Cricket, will ya look at the size of those hooters… I’d like to ride those like a pair of Hoppity Hops!”) And is anyone else wondering if this _phallus majoris_ is where Robert Anton Wilson got the idea for the giant _Rehnquist_ named “Ulysses” that makes repeated appearances in the Schrodinger’s Cat trilogy? ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512/20 "2004-06-16T03:03:04Z")
I always heard he was a big prick. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-to-see-rasputins-severed-dork-in-a-jar-no-im-not-kidding/250512.md?page=2)