# Was the Straight Dope down? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [May 19, 2013, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732 "2013-05-19T16:18:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2013, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/21 "2013-05-19T22:22:27Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > That’s because most other boards have free membership and use the latest software, while this board has paid subscriptions and ad revenue and runs on decades old software… Not really. There are many other boards that offer paid membership and the forum software for this board is not very old. It’s running on vBulletin 3.7.3. Most boards are around the 3.8.x version. 3.7.x is not that old. I don’t know; maybe it’s due to the large user base. I agree that the operation of this board is pretty crappy. Get it updated to 3.8.x or 3.9.x (anything 4 and up at this time is shit and won’t work well with this board). ---
**Author:** ![Zyanthia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Zyanthia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyanthia)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2013, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/22 "2013-05-19T22:24:44Z")
Does this mean **Marley** managed to ban the database this time instead of us? ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/23 "2013-05-20T01:15:27Z")
For me it was down prime-time on a Sunday, when there was bugger all on TV and I’d watched all my DVDs. I was bereft. ---
**Author:** ![Sudden\_Kestrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Sudden\_Kestrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sudden_Kestrel)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/24 "2013-05-20T01:26:25Z")
> [@Anonymous User](#): > > I agree that the operation of this board is pretty crappy. Get it updated to 3.8.x or 3.9.x (anything 4 and up at this time is shit and won’t work well with this board). C’mon, “staff,” you’ve got your orders. Hop to it! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/25 "2013-05-20T01:26:47Z")
> [@Anonymous User](#): > > I agree that the operation of this board is pretty crappy. Get it updated to 3.8.x or 3.9.x (anything 4 and up at this time is shit and won’t work well with this board). > [@Sudden\_Kestrel](#): > > C’mon, “staff,” you’ve got your orders. Hop to it! 😃 Yes, no doubt they’ll jump right on that. I’m not a tech person, so what exactly is a “database error” anyway? Other weird things keep happening. Advanced Search often tells me I have to wait X period of time before I can Search again even if it’s the first Search I’ve made. (And no, I had not clicked on New Posts either.) ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/26 "2013-05-20T01:30:43Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’m not a tech person, so what exactly is a “database error” anyway? It’s known in SDMB jargon as a “frequent occurrence”, not to be confused with “Hi Opal”, “zombies” or “1920’s Style Death Ray”. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/27 "2013-05-20T01:32:54Z")
Thank you for explaining that in layman’s terms. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/28 "2013-05-20T01:34:31Z")
Fine. Maybe not “decades” old, but _feels_ decades old. Anyhow, I kid. Love this board to death, just wish someone would get down in there with a can of WD-40 or some shit. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/29 "2013-05-20T01:49:59Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Yes, the breakdown was caused by white supremacists. But if it was a _white_ screen. . . 😕 ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/30 "2013-05-20T03:00:38Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Thank you for explaining that in layman’s terms. You’re velcome. I am hier all zee veek. Try zie viel. Tvip your vaitress. > [@cmyk](#): > > Fine. Maybe not “decades” old, but _feels_ decades old. > > Anyhow, I kid. Love this board to death, just wish someone would get down in there with a can of WD-40 or some shit. I love it too, and I get withdrawals when it’s down. It’s just down for far too often and for far too long when it is. Honestly, it’s a bit embarrassing, especially given the solid nature of Vbulletin on EVERY OTHER WEBSITE EVER, the amount of mods we have, etc. The moderators need to be empowered with basic knowledge of how the squirrels operate, and lash them into line as cruelly as possible when necessary. I mean…many of us pay for this shit, me included. I hate to keep beating the drum, but Jesus Fucking Christ…what is it with the constant downtime and database errors? It can’t be that complicated given I witness other boards using the very same software that never have the amount of issues this place has. I hesitate to ask, but I will anyway: what in the fuck is the problem? Mods…why does this place have so many and frequent meltdowns when compared to other boards using the same (ubiquitous) software? And the answer can’t be “we get more traffic than other boards” either. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/31 "2013-05-20T04:14:38Z")
> [@Zyanthia](#): > > Does this mean **Marley** managed to ban the database this time instead of us? It’s his birthday, and he decided to take a break. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/32 "2013-05-20T13:53:12Z")
What database is SDMB using? Is vBulletin also a DB? I got the DB error message, too. Not a white screen. I’ll blame the white supremacists here for that anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/33 "2013-05-20T13:55:50Z")
I got the white screen when trying to access The Straight Dope, and the DB error message when trying to access the message board. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/34 "2013-05-20T16:37:44Z")
OK, I only tried the message board. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2013, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/35 "2013-05-21T03:36:32Z")
I love how the “why does this particular messageboard that uses incredibly generic and common software have so much downtime?” question gets ignored repeatedly. And if they don’t ignore it, its “I don’t know”. How do you not know? Who’s running this shit anyway? I mean this in a tongue in cheek yet serious way. Who? Why? Where? What? I just don’t get it. I suppose it’s supposed to be a part of this board’s “charm”. ---
**Author:** ![tim314](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim314/32/3468_2.png) [@tim314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tim314)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2013, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/36 "2013-05-21T04:25:12Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > so what exactly is a “database error” anyway? The database is the system that holds the data. For a message board, the data is posts, usernames, that sort of thing. When you try to view a page of the SDMB, your browser makes a request that goes to a web server, and the web server returns HTML for your browser to render. But in order to know what HTML to return, the web server needs to retrieve data from the database. If that retrieval of data fails for some reason, that’s a database error. (The system probably records a much more specific error, but to us it just says “database error”.) ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2013, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/37 "2013-05-21T05:03:05Z")
So what is the SDMB’s DB? Microsoft SQL? Oracle? What? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2013, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/38 "2013-05-21T06:13:49Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > The database is the system that holds the data. For a message board, the data is posts, usernames, that sort of thing. > [@echo7tango](#): > > So what is the SDMB’s DB? Microsoft SQL? Oracle? What? A small army of hamsters with chalkboards. There’s this huge room with them all lined up scritching away with their chalk, recording everything that happens on the boards. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2013, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732/39 "2013-05-21T14:43:27Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > The database is the system that holds the data. For a message board, the data is posts, usernames, that sort of thing. > > When you try to view a page of the SDMB, your browser makes a request that goes to a web server, and the web server returns HTML for your browser to render. But in order to know what HTML to return, the web server needs to retrieve data from the database. If that retrieval of data fails for some reason, that’s a database error. (The system probably records a much more specific error, but to us it just says “database error”.) Thank you. (I liked **FoieGrasIsEvil’s** explanation though.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-straight-dope-down/658732.md?page=1)