# Was the waitress wrong or am I? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 24, 2011, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879 "2011-08-24T08:05:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2011, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/81 "2011-08-24T23:33:26Z")
As a waitress, she should have mentioned that the ice tea was sweet. Restaurant staff should be there to provide you with this sort of information, as you can’t expect guests to always ask or know what the restaurant offers as a default ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2011, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/82 "2011-08-24T23:36:50Z")
[quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:78, topic:593879”] For many of us, all sweetened tea is too sweet. That’s why all tea that I serve is brewed hot. If the customer wants it sweetened, they can add it to the tea before it’s poured over ice. Are you saying there’s a difference between “sweetened iced tea” and “sweet tea”? If so, please forgive this question from an ignorant Northerner, but what is the difference? [/QUOTE] I think what \*\*Peremensoe \*\* is referring to is the practice in restaurants of serving unsweetened, cold tea over ice and the customer then sweetening the tea using the sugar packets on the table. ---
**Author:** ![pricciar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@pricciar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pricciar)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2011, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/83 "2011-08-24T23:49:21Z")
Certainly, the waitress was wrong to give you a drink that you didn’t order, and compounded her mistake by including them both on the bill. I still think you were wrong to short her on the tip without even bringing the bill to her attention. She might not even realize that she double charged you. Waitresses have lots of tables. Mistakes can happen. Things are overlooked. But, I think your second mistake was opening this thread, since it seems like you are only happy with answers that agree with your point of view. ---
**Author:** ![Quintas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/48db29/32.png) [@Quintas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quintas)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/84 "2011-08-25T00:18:16Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > Dislike sweet tea all you want, but there’s no call to sneer at large swaths of people whose tastes are different from yours. I found it amusing that he’s sneering like some connoisseur of culture but he’s a regular at McDonalds. McDonalds has really spoiled their menu now that they serve hillbilly sweet tea. ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/85 "2011-08-25T00:47:42Z")
Receiving sweetened iced tea is certainly a horrible, horrible thing. I’d probably play the Diabetic card at the time of announcing that the original glass of sweetened tea was not what I wanted. However, even worse than sweetened tea is that NASTY Nestea crap out of a fountain. I’ve been known to ask a server if the iced tea was fountain tea, and when told, “Yes,” I’ve then ordered a POT of hot tea and several glasses of ice. If the server accommodates me, I will usually sweeten the tip. Instant tea is an abomination. ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/86 "2011-08-25T01:50:58Z")
> [@VOW](#): > > Receiving sweetened iced tea is certainly a horrible, horrible thing. I’d probably play the Diabetic card at the time of announcing that the original glass of sweetened tea was not what I wanted. I had ordered the Polish platter - kielbasa, cheese pierogies, potato pancakes, and sweet and sour cabbage all covered in sour cream. So I think I would have had a hard time claiming I cared about my health. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/87 "2011-08-25T02:03:32Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Ice **d** tea. > > Please. Ice **d**. Not ice. Can’t it kinda go either way? I mean, if there is ice in it, why not call it ice tea? I’m not sure which I call it. They both sound right to me, now. [Obligatory SDMB ‘creamed cheese vs. cream cheese’ link.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=486331&highlight=creamed+cheese+iced) ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/88 "2011-08-25T02:20:35Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > Can’t it kinda go either way? I mean, if there is ice in it, why not call it ice tea? I’m not sure which I call it. They both sound right to me, now. No, it can only be iced tea. What else would you drink with your iced cream? I had a similar situation happen a few years ago. A sandwich at a restaurant came with a choice of cheese; my wife asked for muenster or something. When the bill came, I saw the waitress had added a surcharge for the cheese, so I told her the menu mentioned that it came with cheese, and could she remove that charge? She snippily told me I was wrong, without looking at the menu. I told her that she was welcome to check later, but I’d be tipping as though that surcharge weren’t on the bill. Kinda wish I’d stiffed her altogether: it was pretty rude service. But the difference is that I confronted her and gave her a chance to be a jerk about it. Without the confrontation, it seems like very minor incompetence to me, not worth punishing her for. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/89 "2011-08-25T03:08:03Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Not everyone is in the mood for confronting restaurant staff to get a small bullshit charge removed from the bill, but asking the waitress politely to have it taken off seems reasonable. Asking to have an incorrect item removed from the bill is hardly a confrontation - at least not in my world or in the way I talk to people. ---
**Author:** ![Balthisar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/balthisar/32/2825_2.png) [@Balthisar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balthisar)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/90 "2011-08-25T04:00:32Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > Dislike sweet tea all you want, but there’s no call to sneer at large swaths of people whose tastes are different from yours. > [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > (Thanks, **Ellen Cherry**. That was getting my hackles up a bit.) My apologies to both of you. I’d assumed that my grandiose verbiage was an obvious use of hyperbole in a humorous fashion. I didn’t mean to offend. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/91 "2011-08-25T06:27:14Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > We probably should have it as a banner at all the borders - iced tea in Canada is highly likely to not be what US Americans expect it to be. > [@MsWhatsit](#): > > People from the southern part of the US expect sweetened tea when they order iced tea. People from the rest of the US expect unsweetened tea. I have no idea what y’all are serving in Canada. 🙂 We serve iced tea. Period. We have no idea what “sweetened” or “unsweetened” iced tea is; at least, according to Americans, Southern or otherwise. If you want it in a certain way, specify. Otherwise, you’ll get the default that is on offer, which is made according to the local taste; and that may or may not accord with _your_ taste. Best to ask about what you’ll be getting when you order. Similarly, I’m with **Cat** here–things may not always be as you expect. As a martini drinker, I know what a martini is, and I know how I like it–and a few times, I haven’t got what I’ve expected or liked. So, I’ve learned to specify: a Bombay Sapphire martini, dry, served on the rocks, in a rocks glass, and garnished with an olive. I ask for that and I get what I want, but I don’t expect that anybody would read my mind on that one. And neither should the OP when it comes to iced tea. He or she should learn to specify, and not to assume that “iced tea” means the same thing in all places. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/92 "2011-08-25T07:11:46Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > Asking to have an incorrect item removed from the bill is hardly a confrontation - at least not in my world or in the way I talk to people. Right. It seems the OP thinks the choice is between not doing anything, being aggressive, or being passive aggressive. But that’s a false trilemma. There’s also the fourth option of being assertive: politely telling the waitress that there’s a problem. Then if she refuses to fix the bill, then it’s okay to take it out of her tip. And even then I would definitely tell her that that was what I was doing. And if she made a fuss about that, I’d just get up and leave without giving her a tip at all. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/93 "2011-08-25T07:26:17Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Right. It seems the OP thinks the choice is between not doing anything, being aggressive, or being passive aggressive. But that’s a false trilemma. There’s also the fourth option of being assertive: politely telling the waitress that there’s a problem. > > Then if she refuses to fix the bill, then it’s okay to take it out of her tip. And even then I would definitely tell her that that was what I was doing. And if she made a fuss about that, I’d just get up and leave without giving her a tip at all. I’m not trying to pick a fight or anything, and I don’t want to nitpick to death - but I don’t even see it as assertive… I see drawing it to the waitresses attention as no more than a comment like “excuse me, do you have the time?” “or do you know the way to dundee?” If I were the waitress, I wouldn’t take any sort of offence at being asked, and neither would I hestite to ask if I were in that situation. It’s a very trivial matter. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/94 "2011-08-25T20:19:50Z")
[QUOTE=Gary “Wombat” Robson] Are you saying there’s a difference between “sweetened iced tea” and “sweet tea”? If so, please forgive this question from an ignorant Northerner, but what is the difference? [/QUOTE] Sweetened tea is what happens when a customer gets a glass of plain iced tea and they stir in sugar. Sweet tea is more or less brewed with simple syrup, resulting in a different sweetness and taste than trying to sweeten tea after it’s been brewed. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/95 "2011-08-25T20:26:22Z")
I agree that the waitress may have inadvertently charged you for two drinks. In either event, if you cannot confront a waitress on something so trivial, then expect to open up lost of threads such as these. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2011, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/96 "2011-08-25T20:26:50Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > We serve iced tea. Period. We have no idea what “sweetened” or “unsweetened” iced tea is; at least, according to Americans, Southern or otherwise. Unsweetened iced tea is…iced tea without sweetener in it. Sweetened iced tea is the opposite of that. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2011, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/97 "2011-08-26T01:55:56Z")
> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/594656/4): > > It is funny when someone comes asking for advice, are told they are wrong, and continue to press the point. It’s like it never occurred to them. This isn’t a poll thread. I’m not submitting my life to a vote. I did what I did and I personally feel I did the right thing. However, I though I’d hear what other people have to say. I was asking for opinions not advice. If everyone was telling me I was wrong, I would stop and rethink my opinion. But that’s not the case here. It seems there are plenty of people who agree with me. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2011, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/98 "2011-08-26T02:24:18Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > It seems there are plenty of people who agree with me. Keep telling yourself that. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2011, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/99 "2011-08-26T02:57:44Z")
Suppose I asked for a coffee, and then returned it because I wanted decafinated coffee? Chances are I’d still get billed for one coffee. I would have asked her if she was serious about charging me twice for the iced tea. That would give her a chance to amend the bill that someone else may have wrote up without thinking. You may have felt good about stiffing on the tip, but you don’t feel good about it now do you ? ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2011, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879/100 "2011-08-26T03:15:32Z")
So, let’s say a glass of iced tea is $2. Let’s also say what you would have wanted to pay (bill with one glass of iced tea) is $18 but she charged you $20. Let’s assume you leave an “[average](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tip_%28gratuity%29#United_States)” tip of 15% On the correct order, that’s $2.70. On the incorrect order, that’s $3.00 But you actually took off the cost of the iced tea, hypothetically leaving the waitress with a $0.70 tip? A 3.5% tip is…cheap…especially over such a trivial mistake. Should you not, instead, have docked her the cost of the _tip on the value of the tea_, that is, $0.30, so leaving her with $2.70…or $2.50 or $2.00 if you felt the error needed a reduction in the tip percentage? It’s what I would have done, had I not simply asked her to correct the bill in the first place. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/was-the-waitress-wrong-or-am-i/593879.md?page=6)