# Ways to improve professional sports
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258
**Category:** The Game Room
**Created:** [August 16, 2008, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258 "2008-08-16T21:05:46Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Yodalicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yodalicious)
#### Post date: [August 16, 2008, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/1 "2008-08-16T21:05:46Z")
Baseball: 24 labrador retrievers on the field at all times.
Football: Played in a forest.
Basketball: A thick coating of wax over the entire floor.
Hockey: Polar bears… nuff said.
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### Author:  [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)
#### Post date: [August 16, 2008, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/2 "2008-08-16T21:12:45Z")
Baseball: Full contact.
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### Author:  [@SSG\_Schwartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSG_Schwartz)
#### Post date: [August 16, 2008, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/3 "2008-08-16T21:19:01Z")
LPGA: Totally naked
Auto Racing: School Bus Stops
Football: Final two minutes, there are no sidelines
SSG Schwartz
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### Author:  [@3acresandatruck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3acresandatruck)
#### Post date: [August 16, 2008, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/4 "2008-08-16T21:54:11Z")
put the stock car back in NASCAR in an insane way:
NASCAR will receive each team’s choice of a stock vehicle from the manufacturer, and inspect it to insure that it is a vehicle available to the public. NASCAR will deliver that vehicle to the race team two hours before the race/qualifying session. They must add a roll cage and belts. They may modify the suspension as they wish. The stock engine block, stock transmission case and stock differential housing must be retained, but stuff like induction, exhaust, and gearing are fair game. Brakes, wheels and tires are also fair game. The front passenger seat may be removed, but the rest of the stock interior must be retained. No changes to the body exterior are allowed, except they can put as much duct tape on the car as they want. There might need to be a limit on the number of people on the pre-race crew, just like there is a limit on the number of pit-crew members who go over the wall in a race. Teams may maintain their own vehicles for testing and practice.
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### Author:  [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2008, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/5 "2008-08-17T00:41:26Z")
I’ve had a couple of odd ideas for baseball, one weirder than the other.
The first one involves removing the outfield fences, or, rather, pushing them way back. Minimum distances would be 500 down the lines, 525 to the alleys, 550 to straightaway. The appeal to me is how it would change the game. Outfielders would have to be very fleet of foot with good throwing arms (and in fact some teams may put an infielder out there, at least for some batters), and there would be a lot of strategy involving how deep to play the outfielders. Almost all home runs would be of the inside the park variety-even someone like Papi Ortiz would get some when they got a hard-hit ball past (or over) the outfielders. Because the outfielders would have to play back, there would be a lot of hits falling in front of them. Averages would shoot up, home runs down, doubles and triples galore. Strikeout pitchers would be at a premium (to prevent balls in play which have a much greater chance of falling in than before). It would be a different, and perhaps more interesting game-maybe not.
My 2nd weird idea is the pentagonal base path. Instead of the 90 degree fair area you would now have 120 degrees. The bases would be laid out along a pentagon (yes I know the interior angles of regular pentagons are 108 degrees), with an extra, “fourth” base. The angles between the other four bases (i.e. not involving home plate) would be 140 degrees. Each team would have 2 extra players on the field, a “fifth” baseman, and an extra outfielder, to cover the extra area. Bases would be 85 feet apart, so you have a better chance of beating out infield balls, but a longer distance to go to score. I don’t know if home runs would become more or less important; I guess the extra base combined with the possibility of having four teammates on might trump the extra infield hits (and the help thus given the speed merchants).
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### Author:  [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2008, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/6 "2008-08-17T00:49:46Z")
Eliminate “sports” which require judges rather than referees: Gymnastics, Figure Skating, Diving, Freestyle Skiing, Half-Pipe competitions, etc. Get rid of the ski-jumping judges and make it a pure distance event.
Yeah, I know, never happen…
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### Author:  [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/7 "2008-08-18T01:35:12Z")
I’ve often thought that it would be cool for American football to have a field that is a mile long, rather than just 100 yards. Just imagine if a wide receiver breaks away from the defense and makes a reception…he may have to run almost a mile to get the touchdown.
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### Author:  [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/8 "2008-08-18T01:45:29Z")
I can’t think of a sport that _wouldn’t_ be improved with the addition of Polar Bears.
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### Author:  [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/9 "2008-08-18T04:21:04Z")
Fencing: Do I really need to say it?
FINISH HIM!
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### Author:  [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/10 "2008-08-18T04:39:28Z")
I think the easiest way to improve sports, particularly in this time of the tightening entertainment dollar, is to add more value by showing simultaneous double-headers. Now these may be the same sport or two different sports played at the same time in the same physical space.
So you might see Dolphins vs Bills on the same field at the same time as Cowboys vs Giants. To start proceedings one game would kick off in either direction, each game using a different coloured ball and one set of referees would use green flags. In most games the simple confusion created by 2 sets of offence and defence, sometimes going the same way, sometimes going opposite ways, sometimes both running, sometimes both passing would be thrilling enough but imagine if the Jets and the Giants were playing games on the same field. They could either help one another or hinder each other without the officials being able to call any infractions as they are not in the same game.
Baseball games would be a little riskier as the two diamonds would be offset just enough so that the right handers batting box of one didn’t overlap the left handers batting box of the other. Of course as you look from the pitcher’s mound (either one) the batter on the right, if he gets a hit, may have to run through home plate of the other batter while he is being pitched to but this is an equal inconvenience because the runner takes the risk of being hit by a perfectly good pitch. Of course different coloured balls will need to be developed so that the pairs of fieldsmen know who should catch which fly ball.
I’m still working on my combined football/baseball game.
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### Author:  [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/11 "2008-08-18T04:48:08Z")
Cyborgs. Or, if that’s too much to ask of the athletes, powered exo-skeletons.
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### Author:  [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/12 "2008-08-18T04:51:40Z")
[QUOTE=SSG Schwartz]
LPGA: Totally naked
SSG Schwartz
[/QUOTE]
You’ve never seen Laura Davies, have you?
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### Author:  [@SSG\_Schwartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSG_Schwartz)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/13 "2008-08-18T04:56:45Z")
[QUOTE=astorian]
You’ve never seen Laura Davies, have you?
[/QUOTE]
You’ve never seen [Michelle Wie](http://golf.about.com/od/michellewie/ig/Michelle-Wie---07-Sony-Open/Michelle-Wie---07-Sony-Open-4-.htm). I would look at Laura Davies for an hour just to see five minutes of Michelle Wie (FTR, she is over 18 now)
SSG Schwartz
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### Author:  [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/14 "2008-08-18T14:15:12Z")
[QUOTE=don’t ask]
I think the easiest way to improve sports, particularly in this time of the tightening entertainment dollar, is to add more value by showing simultaneous double-headers. Now these may be the same sport or two different sports played at the same time in the same physical space.
So you might see Dolphins vs Bills on the same field at the same time as Cowboys vs Giants. To start proceedings one game would kick off in either direction, each game using a different coloured ball and one set of referees would use green flags. In most games the simple confusion created by 2 sets of offence and defence, sometimes going the same way, sometimes going opposite ways, sometimes both running, sometimes both passing would be thrilling enough but imagine if the Jets and the Giants were playing games on the same field. They could either help one another or hinder each other without the officials being able to call any infractions as they are not in the same game.
Baseball games would be a little riskier as the two diamonds would be offset just enough so that the right handers batting box of one didn’t overlap the left handers batting box of the other. Of course as you look from the pitcher’s mound (either one) the batter on the right, if he gets a hit, may have to run through home plate of the other batter while he is being pitched to but this is an equal inconvenience because the runner takes the risk of being hit by a perfectly good pitch. Of course different coloured balls will need to be developed so that the pairs of fieldsmen know who should catch which fly ball.
I’m still working on my combined football/baseball game.
[/QUOTE]
I’d also like to see a basketball game involving three teams, played on a Y-shaped court.
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### Author:  [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/15 "2008-08-18T15:07:31Z")
How to improve bicycle racing: paintball guns and city traffic.
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### Author:  [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/16 "2008-08-18T16:06:17Z")
Baseball: Pits in the outfield. Each stadium can fill the pit with whatever they want. Tigers, devil rays, diamondbacks…uhm, yankees…
Anyway, if you hit a ball and it lands in one of the pits it doesn’t guarantee a hit. The outfielder can make the choice to fish the ball out of the pit. If they do, it’s an automatic inning-ending play. This probably won’t happen much in the regular season, but play will be increasingly more exciting as the post-season gets closer.
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### Author:  [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/17 "2008-08-18T16:20:45Z")
All sports take all the steroids and drugs you want. None of my business what you take ,but the games would be better. They are spectator games after all.
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### Author:  [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/18 "2008-08-18T16:29:36Z")
I would do away with all first-base and third-base coaches in baseball. If you can’t keep yourself reminded not to take too big a lead, or if you can’t guess accurately how an outfielder’s throwing arm will be, then fuck it, you deserve to get thrown out.
And if they’re going to keep 'em, then instead of uniforms they should wear gingham dresses, and carry extra nappies and lollipops.
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### Author:  [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/19 "2008-08-18T17:16:22Z")
[QUOTE=Ponch8]
I’ve often thought that it would be cool for American football to have a field that is a mile long, rather than just 100 yards. Just imagine if a wide receiver breaks away from the defense and makes a reception…he may have to run almost a mile to get the touchdown.
[/QUOTE]
They’d probably have to put a couple of refs on Segways, so as to keep up with the players…
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### Author:  [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2008, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ways-to-improve-professional-sports/460258/20 "2008-08-18T17:37:13Z")
Can’t believe I’m first with this, but [Blernsball](http://theinfosphere.org/Blernsball)!
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