# We have a new jerk off **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 9, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108 "2003-08-09T23:51:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/1 "2003-08-09T23:51:12Z")
We got a new one, boys. This jerk has made four posting in his last day around here all of which can be linked from[here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?action=showresults&searchid=804972&sortby=lastpost&sortorder=descending). A brief review of our new friend’s postings will clearly show that 1. he has recently been released from a position as village idiot 2. he (or she, I suppose, but that seems unlikely) is an escapee from a facility for the perpetually deliberately offensive, 3. our friend has grown restive waiting for the start of seventh grade football practice, or worst of all 4. we are dealing with Ann Coultier’s id made flesh and given access to the Internet. This clown is a real life jerk off and his contribution so far is akin to the stuff you use to hear from beer drunks in a rural tavern. With luck someone in authority will come in from their afternoon of fun in the sun and relieve us of this waste of carbon. ---
**Author:** ![Road\_Rash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a8b319/32.png) [@Road\_Rash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Road_Rash)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/2 "2003-08-10T00:03:39Z")
You are going to make me figure out his handle!? I like your wit, but I am tempted to do a minor pit myself, ---
**Author:** ![Jabba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5e925/32.png) [@Jabba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jabba)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/3 "2003-08-10T00:10:35Z")
Yes, you could make things a little easier for your readers. I take it **monty2\_2001** is the object of your wrath? ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/4 "2003-08-10T00:11:20Z")
I would assume **Spavined Gelding** is referring to **monty2\_2001**. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/5 "2003-08-10T00:11:42Z")
Lemme guess, this is about **monty2\_2001** , isn’t it? Gosh, I at least hope I’m right or otherwise, my detective skills are getting a little rusty. ---
**Author:** ![Atreyu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@Atreyu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atreyu)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/6 "2003-08-10T00:12:12Z")
My guess is that the individual being referred to in the OP is **monty2\_2001**. Do I win a prize for solving the mystery, **Spavined Gelding**? ---
**Author:** ![Atreyu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@Atreyu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atreyu)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/7 "2003-08-10T00:29:31Z")
I’m convinced the hamsters delayed my post in order to get the prize. I _swear_ Jabba’s post wasn’t there when I hit “submit.” ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/8 "2003-08-10T00:32:39Z")
so… did anyone figure out who the linked poster was? ---
**Author:** ![Spavined\_Gelding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@Spavined\_Gelding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spavined_Gelding)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/9 "2003-08-10T00:39:53Z")
Bingo– **Monty2\_2001** is my boy, the twit of the day, the idiot without parallel, the hands down winner of the Drive-by and One Trick Pony Sweeps Stakes. My fault on the link–I thought it was to our favorite seventh grader’s member information and posts. It wasn’t. It just linked to the threads in which this junior reactionary has rolled a grenade. This is what a guy gets for trying to be cute. ---
**Author:** ![Road\_Rash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a8b319/32.png) [@Road\_Rash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Road_Rash)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/10 "2003-08-10T01:01:24Z")
The mystery thickens. If monty2\_2001 is a new poster, then why does his registratiion date say Feb 2001? Yet there are no posts recorded in the search until yesterday. I think this is a job for the Mod Squad! ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/11 "2003-08-10T01:12:23Z")
> [@](#): > > why does his registratiion date say Feb 2001? Yet there are no posts recorded in the search It was a time limited search. Here’s [monty2\_2001’s first post](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2211148#post2211148), in February 2001. ---
**Author:** ![Road\_Rash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a8b319/32.png) [@Road\_Rash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Road_Rash)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/12 "2003-08-10T01:22:51Z")
He is like the locust in the cocoon. Only emerging every two years for a day or two to devour logic with his paranoid rants. Soon it will lay eggs and die for another cycle. ---
**Author:** ![cheddarsnax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@cheddarsnax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cheddarsnax)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/13 "2003-08-10T01:31:28Z")
We need more posters like our friend **monty2\_2001**. How else will we root out the vast socialist terrorist fascist liberal communist network infecting our government at every level? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/14 "2003-08-10T01:48:47Z")
Give us money? ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/15 "2003-08-10T01:54:14Z")
> [@](#): > > How else will we root out the vast socialist terrorist fascist liberal communist network infecting our government at every level? Cripes! Just by reading a **december** thread. This would allow the Administration to put over half of 'em in Cuba. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/16 "2003-08-10T01:58:31Z")
Actually, it’s part of **december** ’s subtle plan to win over our hearts and minds. He figures if he keeps posting his evidence of wrongdoing on the left, while recruiting people like this that make him sound reasonable by comparison, someday victory will be his! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/17 "2003-08-10T02:02:12Z")
“Subtle” and “ **december** ” are two words that should never appear in the same sentence. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![Clint\_in\_Wichita](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Clint\_in\_Wichita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clint_in_Wichita)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/18 "2003-08-10T04:37:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Spavined Gelding \* > \*\*We got a new one, boys. This jerk has made four posting in his last day around here all of which can be linked from[here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?action=showresults&searchid=804972&sortby=lastpost&sortorder=descending). A brief review of our new friend’s postings will clearly show that > > 1. he has recently been released from a position as village idiot > 2. he (or she, I suppose, but that seems unlikely) is an escapee from a facility for the perpetually deliberately offensive, > 3. our friend has grown restive waiting for the start of seventh grade football practice, or worst of all > 4. we are dealing with Ann Coultier’s id made flesh and given access to the Internet. > > This clown is a real life jerk off and his contribution so far is akin to the stuff you use to hear from beer drunks in a rural tavern. With luck someone in authority will come in from their afternoon of fun in the sun and relieve us of this waste of carbon. \*\* After looking at every one of his posts in the threads provided in the link, it is clear that your only real problem with him is that he’s openly conservative. His contributions may be small, but I doubt you’d care if he agreed with your political views. If you want him banned for being a conservative, then at least have the guts to come out and say it. His posts are not offensive, whether you agree with him or not. Grow a skin. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/19 "2003-08-10T04:41:01Z")
The cold autum wind was a **subtle** reminder that **December** would soon be upon us. ---
**Author:** ![LudditeAndroid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8baadc/32.png) [@LudditeAndroid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LudditeAndroid)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108/20 "2003-08-10T06:05:04Z")
Damn, I was hoping somebody was welcoming me to the board. _sob_ Always a bridesmaid . . . [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-new-jerk-off/194108.md?page=2)