# We have A Phelps Sighting. Little Help Over Here! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 12, 2006, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479 "2006-06-12T20:14:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/21 "2006-06-13T09:14:33Z")
I like the idea of raising money for charities that would piss him off a few feet away from his demonstration. Overall I think he is doing more to promote gay rights than anything else, so let him yell and scream. If people see a nutjob scapegoating gays for war they will be more sympathetic to the cause of gay rights. Today we look back at the scapegoating of jews for things like ww1 and it motivates people to fight anti-semitism, not join it. Same thing. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/22 "2006-06-13T09:16:53Z")
Would it be illegal to throw stinkbombs at the Phelps people? Not anything that would hurt them, just some kind of mixture of chemicals that would smell really, really horrible. Just throwing it on the ground near them would be enough, you wouldn’t have to throw it ON them (doing so could get you charged with battery.) ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slip\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f475e1/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slip\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slip_1)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/23 "2006-06-13T10:38:17Z")
No one’s suggested completely ignoring them? Anything else feeds the real-life troll. Phelps isn’t nearly that important. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/24 "2006-06-13T10:40:01Z")
**Argent Towers** , even throwing something \*near \* them might get them to physically attack you. Several years ago, at the church I attended at the time, the first Sunday service, during summer, was held in an outdoor chapel area. So the Phelps show up, and from the sidewalk are hollering and hooting and waving their signs. No danger of physical contact, as the chapel is about 50 yards from the walk. After the service our pastor took a yardsign that says "God’s Love Speaks Loudest and, staying on the church lawn, walked close to the sidewalk where they were mocking him and used a hammer to pound it in. He never got to finish the job. The head of the hammer popped off the handle and the WBC interpreted that as a threat. Four of their young men surged onto _our property_, tackled the pastor, and threw him on the ground, sitting on him until the police arrived. Then they charged him with assault, saying he threw the hammer head at them. So the church was obliged to counter-file. Pastor Weeks had his back wrenched, his glasses broken, and told me later “It was hard to breath. I thought I was going to die with two tons of Phelps on top of me.” Both sets of charges ended up being dropped I think, but some folks in the congregation were not happy with Rev. Week’s proactive stance, and the lack of support showed. He ended up, a couple years later, taking a call elsewhere, and I didn’t blame him. So be careful around them. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/25 "2006-06-13T13:48:04Z")
The Phelps family is a Johnny-one-note: God hates everybody but us. They are also very lawsuit happy, so watch it when dealing with them. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/26 "2006-06-13T15:06:23Z")
> [@DoctorJ](#): > > _“And the BIIIIIIIIIIIble says-uh, that JEEEsus is the Lamb of God-uh. The LAMB of GOD-uh! Would you rub Him with a vinegar based sauce-uh, and put Him on the grill-uh? Over hickory smoke-uh? Would you serve Him on a BUN-uh, with pickles and onions? Would you serve slaw on the side-uh?”_ That was pure genius 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/27 "2006-06-13T15:29:28Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > I like the idea of raising money for charities that would piss him off a few feet away from his demonstration. Overall I think he is doing more to promote gay rights than anything else, so let him yell and scream. . A sound and reasonable answer. I applaud you for this. I still like the insulting t-shirt idea, though. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/28 "2006-06-13T16:10:20Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > I like the idea of raising money for charities that would piss him off a few feet away from his demonstration. Someone organized, I forget what it’s called, but basically a Phelpsathon where you get people to pledge, say, a dollar for every minute the Phelps protest continues, for gay charities (youth groups, Lambda Legal, etc.) Put up a sign noting this. Either Phelps will go away in a hurry or else the charities will make lots of money. ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/29 "2006-06-13T16:28:10Z")
I do like the Phelpsathon ideas, but you should notify the local Hells Angels and/or a local Scottish group, in case you need to drown out the protests. Look up your local noise ordinances, too, and call and complain about the Phelps if you suspect they may be over the limit. ---
**Author:** ![Tabula\_Rasa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a9adbd/32.png) [@Tabula\_Rasa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabula_Rasa)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/30 "2006-06-13T17:43:19Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > I do like the Phelpsathon ideas, but you should notify the local Hells Angels and/or a local Scottish group, in case you need to drown out the protests. Look up your local noise ordinances, too, and call and complain about the Phelps if you suspect they may be over the limit. Every good -athon needs to provide entertainment. I’d tuck the bagpipers away somewhere before calling the cops about Phelps’ decible level, though. ---
**Author:** ![whole\_bean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/96bed5/32.png) [@whole\_bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whole_bean)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/31 "2006-06-13T17:59:38Z")
> [@DoctorJ](#): > > _“And the BIIIIIIIIIIIble says-uh, that JEEEsus is the Lamb of God-uh. The LAMB of GOD-uh! Would you rub Him with a vinegar based sauce-uh, and put Him on the grill-uh? Over hickory smoke-uh? Would you serve Him on a BUN-uh, with pickles and onions? Would you serve slaw on the side-uh?”_ gotta say it sounds better than his usual presentation - wafer thin host and watered down port ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2006, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/32 "2006-06-13T18:13:26Z")
Hold a Phelps-a-thon. For every minute the Phelps crew protests, a dollar is donated to the gay rights organization of your choice. Heck, I’m sure some students at UNC-G or Guildford would love to organize such a thing. (On preview, matt\_mcl beat me to it.) ---
**Author:** ![Tikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5daacb/32.png) [@Tikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tikki)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/33 "2006-06-14T07:56:03Z")
Another Phelpsathon idea–people can donate maybe a quarter each time one of the gang utters a key word, such as God or gay. Maybe someone could make up a tote board to keep track of how many time each word is said. For every 15 minutes the hatemongers hang around all the key words on their signs get added to the score too. Of course, all the money raised would go to a worthy cause. That should get rid of them pretty quick. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/34 "2006-06-14T14:46:26Z")
Does anyone recall Henry Rollins’ idea for a counter-Klan rally in which the real Klan is diverted down a fake path & then taken captive, while a “new” tricycle-riding Klan in paisley robes takes over, and take off their hoods to show themselves to be a mixed-race group of gay men who then engage in massive french kissing…? Well, try something like that. ---
**Author:** ![the\_PC\_apeman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac8455/32.png) [@the\_PC\_apeman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_PC_apeman)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/35 "2006-06-14T16:16:31Z")
Here’s another interesting Phelps sighting. [Fox News vs. Roper-Phelps](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCdT9dfrb-Q), it’s like watching a fight between asylum inmates. ---
**Author:** ![Sweet\_Mercury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@Sweet\_Mercury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sweet_Mercury)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/36 "2006-06-14T23:40:17Z")
> [@Tabula Rasa](#): > > You could start and publicize a community pledge drive. For every minute Phelps speaks or protests or does whatever he plans on doing, donors will pledge some increment of money to go to a cause that would rankle Phelps. And there are lots of them. If it’s a serviceman’s funeral, the money can benefit the family of the fallen soldier. Or, it can go to an organization working to legalize open homosexuality in the military. Or it can go to a local chapter of any organization that helps homosexuals or their families. AIDS research, maybe. It’s like a cross between a walkathon but without all that walking and cowpie bingo with Phelps as the cow. I’m in for ten cents a minute. I wish it could be more. I think you will find, though, that with enough publicity, it could add up to a shutting up incentive of thousands of dollars a minute – not that Phelps wuill shut up. > > Tabby You’ve mentioned this before, and I’ve said it before, but this has to be the _best_ idea for dealing with Phelps that have ever heard. ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/37 "2006-06-15T04:39:15Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Hmmm…well, you’d need something like a double-decker Mardi Gras float. On the bottom level, you put entrants in a Village People Lookalike contest. Up top, you need a choir composed entirely of drag queens, equiped with microphones, singing something like… > oooohhhh…I dunno…howza about… > _We Shall Over Cum_. > 😃 Or [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5460227&postcount=3) number. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/38 "2006-06-15T08:08:37Z")
**Annie-Xmas** is right: most of the family are lawyers, and their main hobby seems to be provoking lawsuits. Steer clear of them unless you want the headache. As others have mentioned, using their presence against them is the best tactic: raise money for every minute they’re in town, and donate it to the cause they are protesting. That’s the best way to deal with them. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2006, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479/39 "2006-06-15T12:30:15Z")
> [@ThePCapeman](#): > > Here’s another interesting Phelps sighting. [Fox News vs. Roper-Phelps](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCdT9dfrb-Q), it’s like watching a fight between asylum inmates. Great description. I think it takes over from my long favorite of _like a trainwreck full of clowns._ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-have-a-phelps-sighting-little-help-over-here/360479.md?page=1)