# We need new euphimisms for 'penis' **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 11, 2003, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773 "2003-10-11T01:04:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![pervert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbe5ce/32.png) [@pervert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pervert)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/21 "2003-10-11T05:37:32Z")
Timmy! (you have to say it with a growl in your throat.) ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/22 "2003-10-11T05:38:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*\*Hallo! > > My name… > > is Inigo Montoya \*\* I think I love you… ---
**Author:** ![Manatee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/50afbb/32.png) [@Manatee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manatee)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/23 "2003-10-11T06:00:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pervert \* > \*\*Timmy! (you have to say it with a growl in your throat.) \*\* Or like on _South Park_. ---
**Author:** ![quiltguy154](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ad7895/32.png) [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/24 "2003-10-11T07:17:30Z")
The Pompatus of Love ---
**Author:** ![lurksfromwork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lurksfromwork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurksfromwork)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/25 "2003-10-11T08:17:02Z")
mangina pfflanger clitorhis the emu middle stump business man ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/26 "2003-10-11T08:17:33Z")
Hmmmmm… Rosy Red Repro Rod. "You kip usin’ that word; I do not think it mins what you think it mins…’:dubious: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/27 "2003-10-11T08:20:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*\*The Larch. \*\* Stormy Petrel on a stick.:eek: ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/28 "2003-10-11T14:22:38Z")
Caesar ---
**Author:** ![SpectBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@SpectBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpectBrain)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/29 "2003-10-11T14:39:11Z")
The Scarlet Pimpernal My little red chevette My GP (grand prix) Nathan (after Nathan’s Famous) pogo (thinking of the stick and its action) ---
**Author:** ![WILLASS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/54ee81/32.png) [@WILLASS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WILLASS)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/30 "2003-10-11T14:47:01Z")
‘Big Jim and the twins’…I only heard that the other day, but it may be common elswhere in the world. purple headed womb broom tallywhacker ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/31 "2003-10-11T15:06:56Z")
I have a weird sence of humour. I entertained my co-workers with voice gags. I saw a girl who looked a little sad, so I put on my Peter Lorre voice and said to my co-worker: “She looks sad. I should like to _comfort_ her. I have my ‘comfort stick’.” Well, _she_ thought it was funny! Anyway… **Comfort Stick**. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/32 "2003-10-11T15:23:02Z")
Wasn’t there a song with the lyrics “Beat me with your **rhythm stick** ”? ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/33 "2003-10-11T15:26:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SpectBrain \* > pogo (thinking of the stick and its action) I love it? Can I use it? The term, not the penis. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/34 "2003-10-11T15:40:26Z")
If I had a small one with a hair trigger, I’d call it a dubya. I don’t, though. Mine’s called Big Olaf, the anvil. ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/35 "2003-10-11T15:55:32Z")
how about Jack? as in Jack Meoff Although Samurai Jack is good too… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/36 "2003-10-11T16:01:50Z")
Meat Syringe. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/37 "2003-10-11T16:07:03Z")
Getting back to the Monty (Trouser) Python theme, [url=“[http://www.lyricsfind.com/lyrics/3450/33876.php](http://www.lyricsfind.com/lyrics/3450/33876.php)”]this site\* has the lyrics to _Isn’t It Awfully Nice to Have a Penis_. Suggestions from the song would be: Dong Stiffy Dick Tadger Prick Willy John Thomas one-eyed trousers snake Piece of pork Wife’s best friend Percy Cock Of course, none of those are new. ---
**Author:** ![french\_frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c77e96/32.png) [@french\_frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/french_frog)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/38 "2003-10-11T16:17:09Z")
[American, French, German, etc anything but scottish] bagpipe or any instrument you need to blow to make it works 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/39 "2003-10-11T16:40:09Z")
Actually, being of the flying persuasion, I’ve always liked Joystick. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2003, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773/40 "2003-10-11T16:42:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Actually, being of the flying persuasion, I’ve always liked Joystick. In that case, mine would be a **cyclic**. 😉 (Somehow, “collective” doesn’t have the right ring to it.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-need-new-euphimisms-for-penis/206773.md?page=3)