# "We were on a break!" **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 21, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877 "2011-07-21T17:27:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2011, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/141 "2011-07-26T02:51:31Z")
More often than not, the line doesn’t come out explicitly. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/142 "2011-07-26T22:18:21Z")
What if, instead of dating, they were married? And instead of “on a break” they were separated (but not divorced), would that change things? ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2011, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/143 "2011-07-26T22:26:18Z")
If they were married and Rachel was suggesting that he move out of the house for a trial separation, then, yes, he gets to fuck the copy shop girl. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2011, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/144 "2011-09-03T09:17:42Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Yes, I agree. I don’t know which of those definitions applied but I think we can all agree that what he did was deeply hurtful to her. Which doesn’t mean he was being a bad guy in any way. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2011, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/145 "2011-09-03T10:41:38Z")
> [@Stoid](#): > > Which doesn’t mean he was being a bad guy in any way. You mean because he wasn’t intentionally doing it? ---
**Author:** ![Strassia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e8c25b/32.png) [@Strassia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strassia)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2011, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/146 "2011-09-03T17:23:30Z")
I wonder if it would change anyone’s view if we did not see what had been happening between Mark and Rachael before Ross called. If all we had seen was the argument, Ross calling, and Mark asking about more wine, what would you conclude? ---
**Author:** ![C.Montgomery\_Burns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecd19e/32.png) [@C.Montgomery\_Burns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C.Montgomery_Burns)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/147 "2011-09-03T17:27:04Z")
Frankly, I’m surprised Rachel didn’t dump him as soon as he started acting so paranoid about Mark. Suspicion would be normal. It would be cause for alarm if I found out some random guy was being that nice to my girlfriend. However, if I met the guy and everything was above board, I would calm down about it. In real life, Ross’ jealousy would be viewed as bordering on emotional abuse. Come on- forbidding her to see the guy again, sending all that junk to her office, and then showing up at her office under pretense of bringing a picnic just to spy on her and Mark? Ross was way too quick to get mad at Rachel and hang up on her without hearing her out. He was too rash in sleeping with the copy girl. However, Ross was sincerely ashamed of what he’d done. If he hadn’t run around trying to cover it up (which he probably wouldn’t have done if it weren’t for Joey and Chandler’s bad advice), I would have been for Rachel trying to forgive that. However, after the embarrassment of finding out about what happened from _Gunther_ of all people, I wouldn’t have even wanted to see him ever again, much less gotten back together again. Rachel, on the other hand, was way too vague about the “break”. If she didn’t mean they were breaking up for good, she should have been clear about it during the “frozen yogurt” conversation. Then later at the beach house when it looks like they might have moved on and gotten past all this, Rachel tries to make Ross accept _total_ responsibility for everything that happened and opens up all the old wounds, and rubs it in? That would be enough for me to _definitely_ never want see that person ever again, friendships with the rest of the group be damned. I could see them anytime, as long as I didn’t have to talk about her. This incident was enough for me as a viewer for the finale to ring hollow. It was way too contrived. ---
**Author:** ![Tristan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tristan/32/18058_2.png) [@Tristan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tristan)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/148 "2011-09-04T16:50:03Z")
_pulls pin_ She should have stayed broken up with Ross, and ended up with Joey, who was much better for her (and vice-versa) anyways. _lobs grenade_ ---
**Author:** ![expectopatronum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/expectopatronum/32/173_2.png) [@expectopatronum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/expectopatronum)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2011, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/149 "2011-09-04T22:24:32Z")
> [@Tristan](#): > > _pulls pin_ > > She should have stayed broken up with Ross, and ended up with Joey, who was much better for her (and vice-versa) anyways. > > _lobs grenade_ i always kind of wished the joey thing had gotten off the ground. even if they hadn’t stayed together for the long haul, it kind of sucked that the payoff to that storyline was them dating for a week and it just fizzling out. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2011, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/150 "2011-09-07T03:15:00Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > You mean because he wasn’t intentionally doing it? Yes, and not only was it not intentional, he was plainly in denial to himself. ---
**Author:** ![Tapiotar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3be4f8/32.png) [@Tapiotar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapiotar)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2011, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877/151 "2011-09-07T12:26:14Z")
> [@amarinth](#): > > I understand why Rachel was hurt. I probably would have been too. I understand why she didn’t want to get back together with him afterwards. (I do not understand the 18 page single spaced, double sided letter.) But Ross didn’t do anything unethical. Rash and stupid, yes. But he didn’t betray her. > > “I, Ross, take thee, Rachel.” was much more of a betrayal. Agree. I never understood the love for Rachel – to me, she seemed extremely shallow, selfish, entitled, bitchy, awful. True, Ross was neurotic, but notice, he became even more neurotic the longer he was exposed to Rachel. Agree that Rachel and Joey were more suited to each other. They were on the same intellectual level. Never understood why Joey was considered attractive past the first season, either. Stupidity is not sexy. Of course, all the characters became charicatures of themselves the longer the show went on. I preferred the Chandler-Monica arc. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-were-on-a-break/589877.md?page=7)