# We women need this! At Last! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 18, 2004, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854 "2004-05-18T22:47:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![CrazyMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@CrazyMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyMonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/21 "2004-05-19T15:12:40Z")
Pee in the sink. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/22 "2004-05-19T15:52:08Z")
**Jastu** ’s right. This isn’t an issue of falling in the toilet, although that’s enough to make Mother Theresa bitchslap somebody. This is an issue of the revolting condition a bathroom gets into very rapidly because men insist on pissing standing up. You’ve got the aim issue, which is a massive problem (and **Dr.J** can say he doesn’t piss on the porcelain all he wants, there were never yellow streaks down the outside of the bowl when I lived alone). You’ve also got the splashing issue. A stream of water falling from greater height is going to splash higher, and there’s nothing there to block it. So now you’ve got piss all over the bowl, and the pedestal, and the floor, and the inside of the lid, and the freakin’ _walls_, and the _door_, and… So instead of bathroom cleaning being a fairly simple and straightforward job (put cleaner in the bowl, give sink and tank top a quick swipe, brush bowl, flush), it becomes a giant pain in the ass. Put cleaner in the bowl, wipe the sink, wipe the tank top, wipe behind the lid, wipe the inside of the lid, wipe the underside of the seat, wipe the rim, wipe the outside of the bowl, wipe the pedestal, scrub the floor around the toilet, brush, flush, wipe down the walls, wipe down the door, wipe down the toilet paper dispenser, mop the floor. _That_ is the issue here. ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/23 "2004-05-19T17:20:54Z")
Estimated service life of one of those things installed at my house: 18.5 seconds. Mr. Stupid German Toilet Invention, meet Mr. Sledgehammer. We’ve got a pretty simple system around my place. If I’m the last one to use it the seat is up, and if it was her the seat is down. No big deal for us, however much **Dr. J** may need his eyes checked. ---
**Author:** ![Israfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/87869e/32.png) [@Israfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Israfel)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/24 "2004-05-19T17:28:18Z")
Given that we already have to put up with the randomness of the dreaded “dual-stream” (no doubt the cause of the previously mentioned pee on the wall) and the occasional early-morning balancing act over the bowl (sitting definitely wouldn’t help there!) it seems to me that a little understanding is in order when it comes to lid etiquette. 😛 And I’m not convinced that the bathroom would be really any cleaner if we always sat down- in fact, it seems to me that certain problems (namely the streaks on the outside of the bowl) are a direct result of the more humble peeing position. I don’t why it works that way (well…actually I do, but things are already a bit TMI methinks) but it just does. uh…anywho… ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/25 "2004-05-19T17:51:15Z")
I will pee off of my patio into the rhododendrons before I pee sitting down. \* \*Side note: in our household, all of the “dirty” work is officially mine. It never occurred to me that my wife should clean the toilet , kitty litter or take out the trash. Hell, she puts up with me, so it is the least that I can do. ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/26 "2004-05-19T18:23:54Z")
that is why some men pee in the shower. anyway, i came across this toilet where the flush button is _behind_ the lid, so you have to leave the lid down to flush it. toilet seat war solved, imaginary toilet spray solved. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/27 "2004-05-19T18:37:54Z")
I am flabbergasted by the “yellow streaks” phenomenon. I’ve never lived with a guy who couldn’t hit the toilet. If they did dribble, they… SHOCK… **cleaned up after themselves**. :eek: My brother, father, three different male roommates, and my boyfriend never had a problem with this. Who are these men who don’t take responsibility for their actions? In our house, the rule is lids down if not in use, because the cat likes to drink from the toilet. Easy enough. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/28 "2004-05-19T18:44:58Z")
> [@FilmGeek](#): > > I am flabbergasted by the “yellow streaks” phenomenon. > > I’ve never lived with a guy who couldn’t hit the toilet. If they did dribble, they… SHOCK… **cleaned up after themselves**. :eek: :eek: You’re a dang lie! No such men exist! or if they do, they’re all hidden in Kansas! ---
**Author:** ![Kallessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7993a0/32.png) [@Kallessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kallessa)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/29 "2004-05-19T18:46:37Z")
> [@Binarydrone](#): > > I will pee off of my patio into the rhododendrons before I pee sitting down. \* > > \*Side note: in our household, all of the “dirty” work is officially mine. It never occurred to me that my wife should clean the toilet , kitty litter or take out the trash. Hell, she puts up with me, so it is the least that I can do. Yet another married man I want to marry. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Means\_Go](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cc9497/32.png) [@Green\_Means\_Go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Means_Go)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/30 "2004-05-19T18:47:32Z")
My impression of what it would sound like if this was installed in my house. A play in one Act. _ahem_ Me: ::Walks into the bathroom , whistling merrily:: Me: ::Lifts Lid:: Annoying Toilet: “Hello, what are you up to then? Put the seat…” _sound of the entire seat being ripped off of the toilet_ Annoying Toilet: “…back down right away, you are definitely…” WHAM!!! WHAM!!! WHAM!!! WHAM!!! WHAM!!! _sound of smashed bits of porcelin bouncing off the walls and ceiling_ Annoying Toilet: “…not to pee standing up… up… up… up…” _sound of double barrel shotgun being loaded_ KA-BOOOOMMMM!!! The dust settles and we fade to black. The only is sound the blissful tinkle of water followed by an authorative flush. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/31 "2004-05-19T19:12:47Z")
Great idea! Incorporate a shotgun so if the yelling German woman fails to get you to pee sitting down, remove the offending genitalia so there’s not much of a choice! I’ll get right on the new and improved American version. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/32 "2004-05-19T20:17:02Z")
I’ll tell you one thing, if I ever come across this device I will not need to take a sledgehammer to it, I will short it out. And you thought there was a mess when I was TRYING to aim for the bowel. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/33 "2004-05-19T20:26:22Z")
Which ever part was talking, would be the part on which, I would pee. Either that or I would reprogram the voice, possbily with movie quotes. “Look at the size of that thing!” “That’s no moon, that’s a space station.” ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/34 "2004-05-19T21:54:23Z")
> [@jastu](#): > > I don’t think the toilet seat is the issue here, I think it’s bad aim. > Personally it doesn’t worry me one iota whether the seat is up or down as long as there is **no pee splashed on the seat or the floor**. It pisses me off (yes pun intended) to have to do the big clean up every time a guy uses the toilet. For crying out loud learn to pee into the water not on the porcelain or the floor. :mad: _MY Point Exactly!_ When Fireman & I moved into this house together, we had a little house warming. Big Dumb Bird Brother came, peed on the seat. Fireman made a scene over it. That was 6 years ago. I’ve been making a scene with Fireman over it since. Maybe I should talk to his mother about it, after all, she “trained” both of them. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/35 "2004-05-19T22:03:43Z")
> [@Binarydrone](#): > > I will pee off of my patio into the rhododendrons before I pee sitting down. \* > > \*Side note: in our household, all of the “dirty” work is officially mine. It never occurred to me that my wife should clean the toilet , kitty litter or take out the trash. Hell, she puts up with me, so it is the least that I can do. How do you feel about polygamy? (I’m kidding, of course, of course I am.) ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Dragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecc23a/32.png) [@Uncle\_Dragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Dragon)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/36 "2004-05-20T00:37:24Z")
I put the lid down not in deference to my wife and daughters, but due to the fact that I think that a toilet with the lid up looks damned ugly. Men, defend your rights: Stand up and pee counted! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/37 "2004-05-20T00:54:41Z")
Look, If you wimmins want to solve the piss and miss problem creating a bitchy toilet is not the answer. What you need to invent is a device to flush the bathtub. I have long ago figured out the the morning pee(split-stream phenomenon) is best dealt with by aiming into the largest target in the room, ie the tub. So all you need to do is put a device that shoots a bit of water down from the high end, and washes it all away, when a button is pushed(an auto-sensor is a possibility as well). It will probably save water over a whole toilet flush anyway. But whether I use the bowl, the tub or a urinal, I will always pee standing tall and proud. ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/38 "2004-05-20T01:16:45Z")
Two jesting proposals in one thread! Today, I am a man. I finally have my SDMB chops. Ahhh. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ashkicker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4bbf92/32.png) [@Ashkicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashkicker)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/39 "2004-05-20T03:53:56Z")
Now if we could only get more talking devices for men, we women would have it made. I propose a talking lawn mower. “Grass is high. You will mow the yard from start to finish” How about a talking garbage can. “I am full. I need to be emptied. Please take me to the nearest convience center for drop off” “Oh, and don’t forget to reline the can with a new trash bag” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![LorieSmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a587f6/32.png) [@LorieSmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LorieSmurf)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854/40 "2004-05-20T04:43:34Z")
> [@Ashkicker](#): > > How about a talking garbage can. > > “I am full. I need to be emptied. Please take me to the nearest convience center for drop off” “Oh, and don’t forget to reline the can with a new trash bag” 😃 amen. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/we-women-need-this-at-last/245854.md?page=3)