# Weird situation: would you have stayed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369 "2011-09-23T19:19:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/221 "2011-09-26T02:48:59Z")
> [@Labrador\_Deceiver](#): > > False. I am supporting the OP breaking the woman’s window, and operating under the assumption that she did not want him to do so. OK, then we’ve been talking at cross-purposes, and I don’t understand why, as I made it clear that if I were the OP, I would have broken her window regardless of her wishes. _And_, I’d have called 911 for medical attention to her arm. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![misterW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f1d935/32.png) [@misterW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misterW)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/222 "2011-09-26T02:49:57Z")
> [@The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](#): > > And here we have the heart of the matter. The idea that a trapped, isolated woman may end up the victim of a sexual assault isn’t really that ridiculous or abnormal. The idea of coming upon a woman who has her arm stuck inside her car and, instead of helping her, raping her, is indeed ridiculous to any normal person. I think the person who told the joke made the assumption that he was dealing with a normal audience. I suppose if you told the same joke to a room full of sex offenders, they might not see the ridiculous nature of it, and would be somewhat of a tough crowd. > [@](#): > > Also, if you need to explain why a joke is funny, you might want to consider the concept that maybe it isn’t actually universally funny. What joke is universally funny? The question isn’t why it wasn’t unanimously thought of as funny; the question is why such a fuss was made over it. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/223 "2011-09-26T02:51:35Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Did you miss the part where, every time he tried to do what she asked, she cranked up the abuse further? And if “doing what she ask” is more important than “helping her effectively”, then how was he wrong to leave? Heaping abuse on someone _is_, in all practical terms, a request that that person go away. > > Again, it was the stranded woman’s decision that the OP go away, and she’s entitled to make that decision. Huh? When did he offer to do what she asked? She asked him to call 911, but he kept suggesting AAA, the police, or something else. He certainly did NOT try to do what she asked. ---
**Author:** ![Labrador\_Deceiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@Labrador\_Deceiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labrador_Deceiver)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/224 "2011-09-26T02:52:26Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > OK, then we’ve been talking at cross-purposes, and I don’t understand why, as I made it clear that if I were the OP, I would have broken her window regardless of her wishes. > > _And_, I’d have called 911 for medical attention to her arm. 😃 That’s cool. I was mainly addressing the idea (not expressed by you) that the woman would have been stranded there unless and until the police showed up. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/225 "2011-09-26T02:55:30Z")
From what I understand, most car windows now a days are made of safety glass, which is extremely hard to break. It probably wouldn’t have been possible to break the window without causing her further harm. ---
**Author:** ![Labrador\_Deceiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@Labrador\_Deceiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labrador_Deceiver)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/226 "2011-09-26T02:58:44Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > From what I understand, most car windows now a days are made of safety glass, which is extremely hard to break. It probably wouldn’t have been possible to break the window without causing her further harm. It isn’t terribly difficult with a hammer or a screwdriver, and you would not try to break the one in which her arm was stuck. ---
**Author:** ![Soliloquy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@Soliloquy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soliloquy)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/227 "2011-09-26T03:00:45Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > While I realize that Internet Tough Guys ™ are all capable of instantly finding something with which to smash a window and then successfully smashing it while not injuring the woman whose arm is currently trapped in said window, I think that for most other people, calling 911 will lead to a quicker and likely safer resolution. > > And seriously, in a situation like this, who the hell argues with the person who wants you to call 911? “No no, I’m not calling 911, I’ve decided you don’t need it.” The fuck? You don’t smash the window with the arm in it. You smash the passenger side window, turn the key, and roll down the window. As a cop, that is exactly what I’d have done once I responded. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/34f0e0/32.png) [@The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Lovely_Margo_Lane)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/228 "2011-09-26T03:04:15Z")
> [@misterW](#): > > The idea of coming upon a woman who has her arm stuck inside her car and, instead of helping her, raping her, is indeed ridiculous to any normal person. I think the person who told the joke made the assumption that he was dealing with a normal audience. I suppose if you told the same joke to a room full of sex offenders, they might not see the ridiculous nature of it, and would be somewhat of a tough crowd. I’m glad for you that rape is so far out of the realm of “normal” experience. > [@](#): > > What joke is universally funny? The question isn’t why it wasn’t unanimously thought of as funny; the question is why such a fuss was made over it. I and others have tried to answer that not all too much fuss was in fact made, and to detail particular reasoning. You are under no more obligation to accept this reasoning than we are to laugh at super-unfunny (and unoriginal) rape jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/229 "2011-09-26T03:10:41Z")
> [@Soliloquy](#): > > You don’t smash the window with the arm in it. You smash the passenger side window, turn the key, and roll down the window. > > As a cop, that is exactly what I’d have done once I responded. And that, I didn’t think through all the way. I’ll remember that, should the need ever arise. ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/230 "2011-09-26T03:21:45Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > In fact, if her arm was so trapped for half an hour that she couldn’t withdraw it from the window, emergency services are entirely appropriate. It’s likely that she would have been fine, and I offered the suggestion that the OP could have broken the window himself, but she needed emergency medical attention regardless. > > Neither you, nor I, nor the OP know whether or not her arm was permanently damaged. I’m pretty sure the dispatcher can figure out if she needs more information to determine if its a true get-your-ass-out-there-pronto emergency. Not sure if kayaker has any kind of medical training to determine how much of an emergency something is. He called the police. Not sure what the problem is. ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/231 "2011-09-26T03:24:44Z")
> [@Soliloquy](#): > > You don’t smash the window with the arm in it. You smash the passenger side window, turn the key, and roll down the window. > > As a cop, that is exactly what I’d have done once I responded. Or better yet, smash a back seat window so there’s less chance of the driver having to sit or step in in glass. Right? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/232 "2011-09-26T03:26:43Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#): > > I’ll tell you what I thought about the rape joke and the show me your tits joke, and I don’t have a stick in my ass or a man-hating attitude. > > It made me think that here are a bunch of guys, some I like, some I don’t and some I never gave a second thought to … but I never in a million years thought that one of them ever considered raping me or trying to take advantage of me sexually, and now I see that I was wrong. It made me stop and think about who else in my life I may be wrong about. I’ll tell you what I thought about this post and I don’t have a rapist’s attitude. It made me think that there are a bunch of people, some I like, some I don’t and some I never gave a second’s thought to… but I never in a million years thought that one of them had a stick up their ass. Now I see that I was wrong. It made me stop and think about who else in my life I may be wrong about. Jesus titty-fucking Christ. Are you for real? The only people I’ve considered raping were a number of SDMB posters in the handshake thread. You should go check the “I pit the woman who threw her baby off of a four-story parking structure!” thread. Me and a bunch of other posters were making dead baby jokes. I’ll tell you a secret: I don’t really like dead babies. I LOVE them. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/233 "2011-09-26T03:50:51Z")
Supposing this actually happened exactly as the OP says (I’m not saying he’s lying, I’m just saying there’s 2 sides to every story and we’ve only heard his) … Should she have yelled at the OP? No. A sane person would have thanked him for helping. But sheesh - her damn arm is trapped, she’s scared to death, in pain, she’s been screaming and the first person to find her stands there and calmly makes “suggestions” when she’s asking/screaming at him to call 911. I’d be pretty freaked out, too – and pissed. She probably WAS a little bit off her rocker at the moment. I’d have told her to chill out and stop the abuse when all I was trying to do was help her. If she didn’t, I’d have gone back inside, but I wouldn’t have left her. And calling the non-emergency number was a pretty passive-aggressive move, IMHO. Or … what phouka said in post #148. She was wrong to cuss you out, but you are in no way the “better” person in this scenario. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/234 "2011-09-26T04:29:08Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Did you miss the part where, every time he tried to do what she asked, she cranked up the abuse further? And if “doing what she ask” is more important than “helping her effectively”, then how was he wrong to leave? Heaping abuse on someone _is_, in all practical terms, a request that that person go away. > > Again, it was the stranded woman’s decision that the OP go away, and she’s entitled to make that decision. Where in the OP did **kayaker** say that the woman demanded that he go away? According to him, she kept screaming, “GET BACK HERE, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” That doesn’t sound like “Go away” to me. ---
**Author:** ![Napkin\_Sandwich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8dc957/32.png) [@Napkin\_Sandwich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napkin_Sandwich)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/235 "2011-09-26T11:24:34Z")
> [@](#): > > What joke is universally funny? Maybe [this one?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gpjk_MaCGM) ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/236 "2011-09-26T11:33:10Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > From what I understand, most car windows now a days are made of safety glass, which is extremely hard to break. It probably wouldn’t have been possible to break the window without causing her further harm. Windshields are tough to break. Usually they have to be sawed. Side and back windows are easy to break by design and intent. A BB gun can provide sufficient energy to do the job. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/237 "2011-09-26T11:55:09Z")
So It’s Monday Morning, I wonder how long she was stuck waiting for help on Friday afternoon? Did she know help was on the way…eventually? Regardless of her attitude, that was a cold thing to do, you abandoned a person in pain in fear, you left them all alone in an isolated area with no idea when help will arrive? You did that? Really? 😕 Justify it to yourself all you want, that was a shitty thing to do and you know it. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/238 "2011-09-26T13:12:39Z")
> [@misterW](#): > > The idea of coming upon a woman who has her arm stuck inside her car and, instead of helping her, raping her, is indeed ridiculous to any normal person. I think the person who told the joke made the assumption that he was dealing with a normal audience. I suppose if you told the same joke to a room full of sex offenders, they might not see the ridiculous nature of it, and would be somewhat of a tough crowd. > What joke is universally funny? The question isn’t why it wasn’t unanimously thought of as funny; the question is why such a fuss was made over it. Huh. So, according to you, there are two groups of people who wouldn’t find the joke funny: abnormal people or an audience of sex offenders, so the people who didn’t like that joke must be one or the other. That’s what you just said! I’m not sure the people saying ‘ick’ are the ones over-reacting here. 😃 It really is weird that there are some people who not only think that people shouldn’t say when they don’t like a joke, but that even applies when it’s a joke about rape. Most of you are men, aren’t you? Don’t you feel a little uncomfortable telling women off for saying they didn’t like a joke about rape? ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/239 "2011-09-26T13:35:46Z")
Stayed? _Stayed?_ I was thinking the debate would be about whether or not to call the cops again and say she’d freed herself on her own and they were unneeded. ---
**Author:** ![misterW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f1d935/32.png) [@misterW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misterW)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/240 "2011-09-26T13:56:38Z")
> [@SciFiSam](#): > > Huh. So, according to you, there are two groups of people who wouldn’t find the joke funny: abnormal people or an audience of sex offenders, so the people who didn’t like that joke must be one or the other. That’s what you just said! No, read it more carefully. I said that any normal person would find the idea of coming upon a woman with her arm stuck in a car and, instead of helping her, raping her, to be utterly RIDICULOUS. Just because an idea is ridiculous does not mean it is funny to someone, let alone everyone. To be funny, more is required than just being ridiculous – a good delivery, maybe an element of surprise, some unique characteristic of the lister…you see what I’m saying, right? > [@](#): > > It really is weird that there are some people who not only think that people shouldn’t say when they don’t like a joke, but that even applies when it’s a joke about rape. I never said that people shouldn’t say when they don’t like a joke. I just find it interesting how many of the people who will be indignant about hearing a rape joke will say nothing about jokes that deal with even more horrible things. It is as if you are almost SUPPOSED to be indignant about rape jokes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=13)