# Weird situation: would you have stayed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369 "2011-09-23T19:19:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/321 "2011-09-27T22:34:56Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Yes. Only poor people curse. :rolleyes: I don’t think only poor people curse. Just that I don’t really associate very wealthy or well educated people with letting off a stream of profanity. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/322 "2011-09-27T22:42:26Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I don’t think only poor people curse. Just that I don’t really associate very wealthy or well educated people with letting off a stream of profanity. That’s sweet. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/323 "2011-09-27T23:03:07Z")
Not sure where that is coming from. You guys ever hear the Nixon tapes? Dude cussed like a sailor. VP Biden and his predecessor Cheney have also dropped F-bombs pretty much on mic before. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/324 "2011-09-27T23:07:41Z")
> [@you\_with\_the\_face](#): > > Especially if you have to pee. Really really really needing to pee does make me intensely irritable sometimes, and that’s without having my arm trapped in a car. The best time for me to deal with something or someone annoying is when I’m busting for the loo. 😃 But it also does change the tone of your voice - it’s more gritted teeth than shouting. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/325 "2011-09-27T23:23:16Z")
What if she had to pee AND take a dump? And not a slow-release dump, but an explosive, gut-crampy one? And that’s why she stopped there in the first place. Under those circumstances, she probably should have been more crazed. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/326 "2011-09-27T23:42:12Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > What if she had to pee AND take a dump? And not a slow-release dump, but an explosive, gut-crampy one? And that’s why she stopped there in the first place. Under those circumstances, she probably should have been more crazed. Since she wouldn’t let him free her, under these circumstances the OP was absolutely correct to get away fast. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/327 "2011-09-28T00:13:02Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > What if she had to pee AND take a dump? And not a slow-release dump, but an explosive, gut-crampy one? And that’s why she stopped there in the first place. But, if I read the OP correctly, the business was usually closed at that time of day. IE, no reason to believe that there was anyone in the building to let her use the bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/328 "2011-09-28T00:17:40Z")
“I know it looks like there’s someone standing right in front of you whom you can ask a favor, but I’m usually not here at this time, so you should just pretend I’m not here and I’ll pretend I don’t notice that there’s someone standing right in front of me who could use some help. So toodle-oo! Be sure to check back when we’re open!” ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/329 "2011-09-28T00:28:22Z")
> [@Ike\_Witt](#): > > But, if I read the OP correctly, the business was usually closed at that time of day. IE, no reason to believe that there was anyone in the building to let her use the bathroom. Presumably the OP had a car parked in the lot. If my colon is shouting, “Hey, boss! Incoming!” and I see a car parked in front of a random building, I don’t care if the sign does say “closed”. I’m coming in for a landing and hoping to God that they got toilet paper inside. ---
**Author:** ![Hippy\_Hollow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hippy_hollow/32/4841_2.png) [@Hippy\_Hollow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hippy_Hollow)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/330 "2011-09-28T03:47:49Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I guess I’m feeling some sympathy for the woman because just this weekend I was driving around in Hill Country on my visit to Austin. I’ve been out in the middle of nowhere before, but never like that. Never by myself. I kept thinking about what should happen if my rental car were to break down on one of those long-ass, God-forsaken ranch roads. I had my pre-paid cell phone with me, but what if there was no service? What if I couldn’t give someone the information they needed to find me? What if the few people who were on the road at the time just drove past me, perceiving me to be some kind of illegal day laborer or something? There was a moment, when the gas was approaching the 1/4 mark, that I did start to feel afraid. What if no gas stations showed up in time? What was I going to do? > > If you are not used to be in a rural area, just the idea of being all alone and in trouble is scary. Actually being in trouble and all alone…I don’t know if my city-slickerness coolness would have kept it all together. Well, you know we Texans are friendly folk, and I’d wager any passerby would help you. I’m always amazed that invariably, if I see someone broke down on the side of the road, there’s a car right next to it helping out. And though you might be snippy and freaking out, I have a hard time imagining you calling someone trying (or potentially deciding whether) to help a “motherfucker.” 🙂 > [@monstro](#): > > What if she had to pee AND take a dump? And not a slow-release dump, but an explosive, gut-crampy one? And that’s why she stopped there in the first place. Awesome. I have been imagining the scenario at a business near the train stop I take. Once, I walked from my campus to the train station. The station is on a major road on the semi-rough side of town. There’s literally one or two businesses (restaurant and gas station), and a bunch of social service offices, churches, and homes on the street. Well, as I continued to walk, the faint want to pee became a urgent desire. I get to the train station and note a) there isn’t anything around except some newly-constructed apartments, b) there aren’t any trees to water (or that provide adequate camouflage), and c) there appears to be some kind of CCTV camera on the roof of the train station. I also realized that even if the train showed in a few minutes, I was going to wet myself en route to the house. No way I was going to be able to hold it in for 26 minutes plus the car drive home. So I saw a business building a few hundred yards away. I was going to water the wall of their dumpster, but I saw that the building had some kind of human activity, and I went to the door. Opened it, walked in, didn’t see a receptionist. Walked up a landing… and there was Nirvana. A clean, welcoming lavvy, and I have never peed as forcefully and with greater relief. Washed hands, opened door and headed out. As I’m mere feet from the door, a woman asks me if I need help. I say “no, I’m good” cheerfully. She asks me if I’m here to see somebody and I say, “No, I’m on my way out!” mumbled something about being a professional person, and hit the door. I guess I violated some security code there and some minion got yelled at, and there’s probably some directive that is “Hippy’s Rule” based on the time this homeless-looking Black dude rolled up in the office (it was wintertime, I hadn’t shaved in a few times, and I was wearing three layers of random clothing). All that’s to say, we need more public restrooms. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/331 "2011-09-28T23:44:38Z")
I question how any normal person can get their arm stuck in a window to the point where they can’t retrieve it. Its not handcuffs, eventually, out of desperation, she would have yanked it out. Leaving her is ok in that situation ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/332 "2011-09-29T00:42:39Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Its not handcuffs, eventually, out of desperation, she would have yanked it out. Leaving her is ok in that situation :rolleyes: Yes, she should always carry a penknife in case she needs to amputate her arm at the elbow. Seriously, you can’t imagine how people can get stuck? Never heard of hikers getting an ankle trapped in rocks, or cavers getting trapped in a twisty passage, and so on? You don’t need to imagine it; it happens. ---
**Author:** ![Terraplane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Terraplane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terraplane)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/333 "2011-09-29T14:39:53Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > So anyone needing help deserves help only if they have a very specific way of going about it? > > Someone said it before – you don’t have to like someone to help. He _did_ help. Despite her behavior he still tried to help her get out as fast as possible. She wouldn’t let him so he called the police. You’re acting like he did nothing for her but he helped her in the only way she was going to let him help her. > [@monstro](#): > > But that’s really besides the point, right? > > I mean, she could have been Mother Teresa herself and someone would still find a reason to just put in the call to the police and drive away. Not my problem, dude. I gotta get home and heat up my Hungry Man dinner. No, it’s _exactly_ the point. It’s literally the point of the entire thread, “does a person’s poor behavior justify me not going the extra mile to help them out.” Had she been Mother Teresa, or just somewhat decent, I’d guess anybody in this thread would have stayed with her. A good number of them, the OP included, would have probably had her free within a few minutes. > [@](#): > > A guy is drowing and I’m the only witness. I throw him a life preserver and it thunks him in the head. He screams out, “HELP ME, YOU BITCH!!!” before he goes down a second time. Should I just walk away, not even waiting to see if he grabs the preserver? No, of course not. I should be mature enough in my humanity to be able to divorce my feelings about his craziness to see him through the whole thing. Once he gets to land, yeah, I’m outie and not about to ask for a thank you. But just doing the bare minimum when you know the risks involved and just hoping everything works out..I can’t see how that’s nothing but a weak move. Oh come on. Are you really equating ‘lady with arm trapped in a car window in a parking lot and the police are on the way’ with ‘a man is drowning?’ If the car was on fire this analogy might work, as it is it’s silly. ---
**Author:** ![Invisible\_Chimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f05b48/32.png) [@Invisible\_Chimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Invisible_Chimp)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/334 "2011-09-29T14:55:36Z")
> [@Terraplane](#): > > No, it’s _exactly_ the point. It’s literally the point of the entire thread, “does a person’s poor behavior justify me not going the extra mile to help them out.” I wouldn’t call waiting around until help arrived and she was freed “going the extra mile,” I’d call it the bare minimum to be a decent human being. > [@](#): > > Oh come on. Are you really equating ‘lady with arm trapped in a car window in a parking lot and the police are on the way’ with ‘a man is drowning?’ If the car was on fire this analogy might work, as it is it’s silly. The analogy is meant to demonstrate that both the drowning victim and the lady with her car were panicking and should be forgiven their poor behavior because of it. She was panicking well before the police were on their way, so that’s not part of the analogy until the drowning man reaches dry land. ---
**Author:** ![Terraplane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Terraplane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terraplane)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/335 "2011-09-29T15:19:08Z")
> [@Invisible\_Chimp](#): > > I wouldn’t call waiting around until help arrived and she was freed “going the extra mile,” I’d call it the bare minimum to be a decent human being. Well, color me terrible then. Guess I’ll go find some kittens to punt. > [@](#): > > The analogy is meant to demonstrate that both the drowning victim and the lady with her car were panicking and should be forgiven their poor behavior because of it. She was panicking well before the police were on their way, so that’s not part of the analogy. But the severity of the situation has a strong bearing on how much poor behavior people are willing to forgive. If a drowning person wants to cuss me out, fine, I’ll forgive and deal with it because I’m not going to let somebody actually _die_. If a lady with her arm trapped in a car window wants to cuss me out, fine, I’ll call the police because I’m not willing to let her die or lose a limb. But beyond that, after help is on the way, I’m done. Leaving her in the parking lot with the police on their way isn’t comparable to leaving a drowning man in the water. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/336 "2011-09-29T15:27:35Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > :rolleyes: > > Yes, she should always carry a penknife in case she needs to amputate her arm at the elbow. Seriously, you can’t imagine how people can get stuck? Never heard of hikers getting an ankle trapped in rocks, or cavers getting trapped in a twisty passage, and so on? You don’t need to imagine it; it happens. In rocks maybe, but not a window. For one thing, rocks can wedge between other rocks. This is a car window that she already shoved her arm through. If anything, she should at least be able to move her arm up and down the length of the window ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_T](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Gary\_T](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_T)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/337 "2011-09-29T15:54:22Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > In rocks maybe, but not a window. For one thing, rocks can wedge between other rocks. This is a car window that she already shoved her arm through. If anything, she should at least be able to move her arm up and down the length of the window What probably happened here is she was able to push her arm through the opening against some resistance, but on trying to withdraw found it caught on a bone protruberance. Possible swelling from a snug fit would have aggravated the situation, making it more difficult to get free and more painful to try. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/338 "2011-09-29T16:31:49Z")
I would feel obligated to stay with anyone who is trapped and in distress, because something could happen to make the situation much worse. She could faint, panic and cut herself badly, or someone else with less favorable intentions could come along. My training in first aid and as a lifeguard wouldn’t let me leave. The only reason I would leave would be if my personal safety were threatened. Her nasty abuse doesn’t rise to that level. I would stay for myself, because that’s what I would want someone else to do for me. Her behavior doesn’t really enter into the equation. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2011, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/339 "2011-09-29T20:44:48Z")
**kayaker** –has anything about this cropped up in your life since the Thread started? Any broken glass in the lot? Abnormal amounts, I mean. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2011, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/340 "2011-09-30T13:20:31Z")
> [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](#): > > **kayaker** –has anything about this cropped up in your life since the Thread started? > > Any broken glass in the lot? Abnormal amounts, I mean. Nope, no repercussions whatsoever. The lot is a large gravel lot without a spec of glass (ever). The occasional empty Wendy’s cup is all I ever have found. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=18)