# Weird situation: would you have stayed? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369 "2011-09-23T19:19:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/61 "2011-09-24T02:14:40Z")
I had to think about this for a minute. I’m pretty sure I would have stuck around, but in my car and at a distance. I might even have left or started to leave, but I probably would have turned back or pulled over somewhere I could see her. I think I would have wanted to make sure nothing else worse happened while waiting, but I sure wouldn’t have wanted to put up with what was coming out of her mouth. If she had been nice, and no other solution besides waiting for rescue had been found, I probably would have seen about getting her a cup or a bucket or even a stool. I can’t imagine a fix couldn’t have been figured out, though, if she hadn’t been a lunatic. Definitely one to leave behind in the zompocalypse. Leave her babbling in the gutter, I say. ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/62 "2011-09-24T02:21:48Z")
> [@ZenBeam](#): > > I’d have stayed until I hit my limit in putting up with her shit, then left. How long that was would depend on my mood that day, but **kayaker** was in the ballpark. > > I guess I might stay longer if I thought there was a chance of wolves or a bear happening by before the police arrived. Admit it. You’d stay longer to watch. ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/63 "2011-09-24T02:41:51Z")
You were _more_ than generous. If it were me, if she gave me crap once, I’d say, “Now calm down and don’t get pissed at _me_. I will try to help you.” If she gave me crap again, I’d say, “See ya’!” And away I’d go. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Strangelove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.strangelove/32/6613_2.png) [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/64 "2011-09-24T02:42:21Z")
I’d have stayed, but mostly out of self-interest. For all you knew, the bitch might have thrown a rock through your business window or otherwise caused some damage once freed. Waiting for her to leave makes this less likely; plus, you can ask the cop to note her abusive behavior and that you are worried about your property. I also wouldn’t get within 10 feet of her, and like others noted, I’d pull up a chair and listen to some tunes while waiting for the cops. Of course, had she been pleasant, I also would have stayed, but I’d be much happier about it. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/65 "2011-09-24T03:04:26Z")
I probably would have stayed. But I would have done it from my car, parked a hundred feet away with the radio on. I could keep an eye on her for any emergencies without having to put up with her abuse. ---
**Author:** ![Terraplane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Terraplane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terraplane)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/66 "2011-09-24T05:18:11Z")
> [@The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](#): > > This exactly. I don’t make a judgement about **kayaker** ’s choice, but were it me I would have called 911 and waited with her. Possibly finding a bucket or something for her to pee in. If she continued with the verbal abuse I’d certainly tell her to cut it out and pull out a book to read instead of talking to her and trying to keep her calm, but no words she said would justify in my mind leaving someone alone in such a scary situation. > > Also serious ick to the rape jokes. Can you imagine this woman’s response if the op had brought out a bucket and said “Hey, if you want, you can pee in here.” Bear in mind that her choice is either pee her pants and maybe some drips in the bucket, which doesn’t help her at all, or pull down her pants in front of somebody she’s shown nothing but loathing for and pee into a bucket. This would be a very, very bad idea. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/67 "2011-09-24T05:50:10Z")
I’d have stayed if only for the amusement factor. ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/68 "2011-09-24T05:56:53Z")
Of course I can’t say for sure, but I think I would have called 911, then stayed around until the cops got there. If the woman was as bat shit crazy as you describe, I also would have had my radar pinging on high alert for whatever it was she was trying to distract me from. And I wouldn’t have gotten within 10 feet of her. I would have stayed in the business or my car until the cops came. With someone that nuts, I would want to be there when the cops came so I could give a statement. Plus if she went all ape-shit on the cops I would have wanted to see that too. I wouldn’t have just left her there alone no matter how abusive she was. I’ve been in similar situations, and you just let it roll off your back and do what’s right. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/34f0e0/32.png) [@The\_Lovely\_Margo\_Lane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Lovely_Margo_Lane)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/69 "2011-09-24T06:20:37Z")
> [@Terraplane](#): > > Can you imagine this woman’s response if the op had brought out a bucket and said “Hey, if you want, you can pee in here.” Bear in mind that her choice is either pee her pants and maybe some drips in the bucket, which doesn’t help her at all, or pull down her pants in front of somebody she’s shown nothing but loathing for and pee into a bucket. This would be a very, very bad idea. I didn’t say the op should have found a bucket, I said I might possibly have done so. Small distinction perhaps, but distinction nonetheless. I am a woman, which I think makes a difference in the whole peeing in front of a stranger dynamic. Also I have a tiny bladder, so I have perhaps more visceral empathy for that particular aspect of her plight. The op did ask “would you have stayed?” not “what should I have done?” Plus, me finding and offering the bucket in no way forces her to act. She can decide to keep holding it if she wants, see if I care! I wouldn’t be trying to touch her, or getting within swinging distance if she seems physically dangerous. Also, as I see it, finding and proffering a bucket gets me an immediate out from the whole “What if she wants into the building after she gets free???” thing. Use the bucket, bitch! Depending on the specifics of her behavior (does she calm down once she knows an emergency crew is on the way?) I probably would get going once the cops arrived. I don’t have an obligation to stick around once I know she’s safe and somebody else’s problem. Not too worried about vandalism at that point either, as police reports will help my insurance company track her down. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/70 "2011-09-24T06:20:54Z")
I understand being scared and in pain and taking it out on people. So I don’t really hold it against her. I would have felt pretty guilty just leaving her there. ---
**Author:** ![Soliloquy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@Soliloquy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soliloquy)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/71 "2011-09-24T06:41:00Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > From what I understand no. The people answering the non emergency phone don’t have the ability to dispatch it as an emergency. (It’s a computer network thing) A smart dispatcher will tell you to hang up and call 911 though. > > I have no cites to back that up. It’s just what I heard. Coming from a former dispatcher, current LEO, the people answering the non-emergency lines and the ones answering 9-1-1 are one and the same. Doesn’t matter what number you dial. You’d be surprised how many people don’t call 9-1-1 for serious, life threatening emergencies because they didn’t want lights and sirens coming to them. That being said, in my department, her needing to use the restroom wouldn’t have made this an emergency. The fire department might have come and broken her (passenger) window for her. Or we might have. We don’t carry slim jims, and we don’t break into cars. That’s all she’d have gotten. ---
**Author:** ![Terraplane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Terraplane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terraplane)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/72 "2011-09-24T06:43:16Z")
> [@foolsguinea](#): > > I understand being scared and in pain and taking it out on people. So I don’t really hold it against her. I would have felt pretty guilty just leaving her there. I don’t get this. You’re stuck. You’re scared, fine. But when salvation presents itself you’re going to curse it? I have a very hard time understanding that. How could you not have some measure of decency, at the minimum, if not gratitude? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/73 "2011-09-24T06:55:56Z")
She had her arm stuck in her window, not getting chewed on by a rabid bear. Maybe I’ve just gotten myself into more stupid situations than she has (chances are pretty good on that, actually), but that isn’t worthy of a total freak-out and heaping abuse on someone who can help me. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/74 "2011-09-24T07:25:17Z")
I would have immediately fetched something for _ **her** _ to smash the window with, hammer, wrench, rock. Then I’d have left it to her. (But yeah, I’d have sat nearby till I saw the police arrive or her drive off!) ---
**Author:** ![Hippy\_Hollow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hippy_hollow/32/4841_2.png) [@Hippy\_Hollow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hippy_Hollow)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/75 "2011-09-24T07:59:05Z")
I’m with the OP. Someone is on hand to help. Show a little humility/respect/kindness. The OP didn’t cause her arm to get stuck, why is she verbally abusing him? Calling 911 would be useless. You can do the same thing yourself. They’re not locksmiths. I wonder if some kind of lubricant might have helped? (I know what you’re thinking… Get your mind out of the gutter!) ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/76 "2011-09-24T08:23:34Z")
I’d have told her to calm the fuck down if she wanted my continued assistance. The id have found a brick for her to smash the glass. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/77 "2011-09-24T12:52:43Z")
This thread is depressing. Pride much people? Jeez. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/78 "2011-09-24T13:28:26Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > You could have offered the use of a bucket or a coffee can or something, if she really had to tinkle that badly. To everyone concerned about giving her a chance to pee, I never thought to go there. She never specified a need to urinate, just that she had to “go to the bathroom”. :eek::eek: The next morning I looked at the parking lot for evidence of broken window (none) or shit (none). My building has no glass, specifically for security, and an excellent alarm system. Some of y’all are really overloaded with empathy, or else I’m a replicant.😃 ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/79 "2011-09-24T13:32:02Z")
I have the hunch that meth was somehow involved. ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369/80 "2011-09-24T14:27:53Z")
I would have stayed, but said, “I am trying to help you, now settle down or I go back inside…” then I would either stay or go back inside as the situation dictates. I would not have left her defenseless on her own, but also don’t have to take the abuse. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/weird-situation-would-you-have-stayed/597369.md?page=5)