# Welcome a newbie **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 18, 2001, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691 "2001-01-18T15:34:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/1 "2001-01-18T15:34:25Z")
In view of the warmth with which this board received True Pisces, I have been asked to intro another newbie. ``` Well, let me intro someone from the Great White North, ``` Scralden. Please say hello (or, in the case of Crunchy, Bite me, newbie) ---
**Author:** ![Spritle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/2 "2001-01-18T15:38:23Z")
Welcome, **Scralden**! Drop your coat off in the back bedroom and get yourself something to eat. There’s chips and dip in the living room and a cold keg on the back deck. Don’t forget to sign up for the darts tournament. Your screen name is the story of my artistic career. First I scral a picture, den I hangs it up on the fridge. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/3 "2001-01-18T15:49:45Z")
TACKLE-HUG!!! About time you got around to doing this! Could you do me a favor, dear, and grab me something to drink? I’ll be sitting over here on the couch, munching on some chips and chatting with anyone that happens to come by… TruePisces ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/4 "2001-01-18T16:00:13Z")
**Scralden!!!** Welcome to the sum total of all intelligence and humor. Now bite Cruchy. Frogs taste good. (happening by TruePisces) So, what’s your sign? ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/5 "2001-01-18T16:38:52Z")
Welcome, newbie! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Silly\_Rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Silly\_Rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silly_Rabbit)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/6 "2001-01-18T17:02:30Z")
Welcome **Scralden**!! May I direct you to [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=45294) for a warm welcome by the Boards very own **Crunchy Frog** ---
**Author:** ![hampster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/53a042/32.png) [@hampster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hampster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/7 "2001-01-18T18:51:47Z")
Thanks for the thread **LNM** , Be careful with those Tackle-Hugs **TruePisces** you’ll make me spill your Vodka and Coke and **LNM’s** beer. Known this pair for 2 years I will delurk, I will spellcheck my posts, I will provide cites, I will not go insanely seeking revenge. Especially when I didn’t tell him my UserName until last night. :o I’ll just keep these 5 pages of Pit rant material though, I’m sure they’ll come in handy at some point. I was able to shock TruePisces! That’s not much of a brag now, but one day I might make it my sig. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Spider\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Spider\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spider_Woman)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/8 "2001-01-18T18:52:27Z")
Have fun! ----:)/ x o x o ----///\\ ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/9 "2001-01-18T19:16:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scralden \* > \*\*Thanks for the thread **LNM** , > > Be careful with those Tackle-Hugs **TruePisces** > you’ll make me spill your Vodka and Coke and **LNM’s** > beer. \*\* Why do you think I waited until AFTER I Tackle-hugged you to ask you to get me my drink, hmmm??? > [@](#): > > \*\*Known this pair for 2 years > > I will delurk, > I will spellcheck my posts, > I will provide cites, > I will not go insanely seeking revenge. > > Especially when I didn’t tell him my UserName until > last night. :o I’ll just keep these 5 pages of Pit rant > material though, I’m sure they’ll come in handy at some > point.\*\* Scralden, you PROMISED me… no revenge! Now throw those 5 pages out immediately!!! > [@](#): > > \*\* I was able to shock TruePisces! That’s not much of a brag > now, but one day I might make it my sig. 😃 \*\* If it’s not much of a brag, why did you run screaming around the chat room about it for 20 minutes after you did it, hmm? I’m never going to let you shock me again. There’s still a few people out there who haven’t. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > \*\*happening by TruePisces) > > So, what’s your sign?\*\* What do you want it to be? 😉 TruePisces ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/10 "2001-01-18T19:50:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Scralden \* > > I was able to shock TruePisces! That’s not much of a brag > > now, but one day I might make it my sig. 😃 \*\* > > I’m never going to let you shock me again. There’s still a few people out there who haven’t. > \*\* ``` Why don't you shock Scralden in return? ``` ::hands True Pisces cattle prod:: ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/11 "2001-01-18T19:53:12Z")
What’s a **Scralden**? And why do all the newbies have to bite Crunchy? Let the newbies bite another doper, it’s someone else’s turn don’t you think? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/12 "2001-01-18T19:53:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > What do you want it to be? 😉 (in his best secure-in-my-masculinity-and-unsure-of-TPs-gender-but-willing-to-take-a-leap voice) How does “Merge Ahead” sound? And **Scralden,** howzitgoin? Which way to that cold keg? ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/13 "2001-01-18T20:16:22Z")
Welcome newbie. Enjoy yourself…but not too mich. ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/14 "2001-01-18T20:51:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by TruePisces \* > > What do you want it to be? 😉 > > (in his best secure-in-my-masculinity-and-unsure-of-TPs-gender-but-willing-to-take-a-leap voice) > > How does “Merge Ahead” sound? \*\* _looks down at self to make sure_ Yep, Fem. _looks above head to check sign_ And I guess “Merge Ahead” is one of the signs sitting there, too. Works for me! 🙂 TruePisces ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/15 "2001-01-18T21:09:00Z")
I trust your judgement, but would you like a second opinion? 😉 ::merging:: Soooo… TruePisces, are you… seeing anybody? ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/16 "2001-01-18T21:09:34Z")
> [@](#): > > Welcome a newbie No. ---
**Author:** ![hampster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/53a042/32.png) [@hampster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hampster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/17 "2001-01-18T21:27:14Z")
UncleBill, I’m doing fine. In my experience, if you’re looking for water follow a camel, If you’re looking for beer follow Lurkernomore. > [@](#): > > Why don’t you shock Scralden in return? > > ``` > ::hands True Pisces cattle prod:: > > ``` I will not seek revenge… I promised TruePisces… > [@](#): > > quote: > > ``` > I was able to shock TruePisces! That's not much of a brag > now, but one day I might make it my sig. > > If it's not much of a brag, why did you run screaming around the chat room about it for 20 minutes after you did it, > hmm? > > I'm never going to let you shock me again. There's still a few people out there who haven't. > > ``` It’s not much to brag about **NOW** , but wait 'til they get to know you better. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2001, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/18 "2001-01-18T21:41:42Z")
Excellent advice, O wise one. True, honey (can I call you True?) can I get you a refill on that Vodka Coke? I’ll be back in a flash. ::heads back to porch for a draught beer:: ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2001, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/19 "2001-01-19T00:04:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by smug \* > \*\*And why do all the newbies have to bite Crunchy? > Let the newbies bite another doper, it’s someone else’s turn don’t you think? 😉 \*\* They must bite me because I am so damn crunchy. I stay crunchy in milk (and as we learned at the St Louis MoDope Fest - I stay crunchy in Coke, too) And **TruePisces** , funny, I don’t recall seeing your name in the Welcome Wagon thread. I advise any newbies going there to read the rules on the first page so you know it’s all meant in fun - just some harmeless teasing. If you read the posts you’ll see as much of my self-depricating humor as there is of my sarcastic humor aimed at the newbies. Remember it’s all tongue-in-cheek, so don’t take it too seriously. The link is in my sig. ---
**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2001, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691/20 "2001-01-19T01:48:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBill \* > **I trust your judgement, but would you like a second opinion? 😉** I’ll take as many opinions as it takes to set the record straight. 😉 > [@](#): > > \*\*Soooo… TruePisces, are you… seeing anybody? \*\* _wide eyed innocent look_ I see you. Seriously, I’m not seeing anyone, though I’m currently exploring the possibility with someone who’s desire to flirt is only matched by my own… > [@](#): > > \*\*True, honey (can I call you True?) can I get you a refill on that Vodka Coke? I’ll be back in a flash. > > ::heads back to porch for a draught beer::\*\* Please? And thank you. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scralden \* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*\* Why don’t you shock Scralden in return? > > > > ::hands True Pisces cattle prod:: \*\* > > I will not seek revenge… I promised TruePisces… \*\* lurker, honey, you prom… No, wait, you DIDN’T promise… But that doesn’t mean I’m letting you out of your promise, Scralden! I’ll just have to bat my beautiful blues in hopes to make lurker behave, too. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\*And TruePisces, funny, I don’t recall seeing your name in the Welcome Wagon thread. I advise any newbies going there to read the rules on the first page so you know it’s all meant in fun - just some harmeless teasing. If you read the posts you’ll see as much of my self-depricating humor as there is of my sarcastic humor aimed at the newbies. Remember it’s all tongue-in-cheek, so don’t take it too seriously. \*\* _hangs head in shame_ I really HAVE been meaning to get there… Tonight, I promise. _slinks quickly off to Crunchy’s thread so she can return back here to continue in the fun_ TruePisces [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-a-newbie/50691.md?page=2)