# Welcome, New Teenaged Dopers! Don't make me kill you. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 19, 2001, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073 "2001-07-19T17:23:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/122 "2001-08-01T16:37:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Journeyman \* > \*\*I’ve been lurking here for weeks and making the odd post here or there, although I’m sure no one has noticed. Has anyone noticed me committing the transgressions mentioned by Jester in the OP? \*\* **Journeyman** , I’m pretty sure that you’ve got nothing to worry about. If you’re worried enough to ask whether you’ve made the mistakes, then chances are that you’ve been cautious enough not to make them. I have seen your posts around the boards, and none have really stood out as examples of assholish-ness. So keep fighting the good fight, and you’re more than welcome here. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/123 "2001-08-01T16:42:44Z")
you know, I think that may the problem with such eloquent warnings. The people who care already have it together enough to not make the mistakes. The idiots who will do the dirty deeds will never see the big signs saying “Don’t Be an Asshole” and apply it to themselves. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/124 "2001-08-01T20:00:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > Maybe that explains why you’re blind to the glory that is the Chicago Cubs. Gotta love that 93-year-old glory. ::running:: ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Juliet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cc9497/32.png) [@Lady\_Juliet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Juliet)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/125 "2001-08-01T20:22:30Z")
Well **Crunchy** I will try to stay on your good side here at the board, in fear of being intentionally blinded by your jacket. [sub]Stalks Jester some more[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/126 "2001-08-01T22:28:13Z")
Just because I feel like letting anyone know who’s interested: Here’s the [mood jacket](http://home.att.net/~jskellogg/lynda/linda28.htm). Bad pic of me, good pic of the jacket. And I also think **Medea’s Child** nailed it. If one reads the OP and thought, “Gee I hope they don’t mean me. I hope I’m not doing that.” Then odds are that’s not who we’re talking about. However if one reads the OP and think, “Whatever, fuck them. Buncha tight asses.” Guess who the OP is referring to… ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/127 "2001-08-01T22:46:44Z")
Erm… **Budro** was the name of a dog that John Cusack’s character whacked instead of the intended target. For this, the foreign assassin was still stalking him. Ackroyd was the one who said “Budro’s coming for you” and barked. Sheesh. 😉 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/128 "2001-08-01T23:43:38Z")
Okay, okay, so it’s been a while since I saw the movie. Bite me. 😃 And **Crunchy** , I want that jacket. Lord, do I want that jacket. Any one-upmanship that I have achieved over you in this thread will automatically be negated in the event that I gain posession of that jacket. That’s how cool it is. (This from the guy who randomly gave a speech in a restaurant while wearing a trench coat and a Santa Clause hat. But that’s a story for another time). ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/129 "2001-08-01T23:51:21Z")
And the best part about that jacket, **Jester** - not only is it orange paisley, it’s also _velvet_. I spare no expense when I set out to look stupid in public. ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2001, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/130 "2001-08-01T23:55:10Z")
That does it. I want that jacket more than anything. It _will_ be mine, Frog, and not even you can stand in my way! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA! ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Juliet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cc9497/32.png) [@Lady\_Juliet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Juliet)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/131 "2001-08-02T02:31:22Z")
Hmm…it kind of looks like my rug **Crunchy**. That would make one kick ass rug. Of course as a jacket, it somewhat reminds me of something out of The Wizard of Oz… ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/132 "2001-08-02T02:34:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\*And the best part about that jacket, **Jester** - not only is it orange paisley, it’s also _velvet_. I spare no expense when I set out to look stupid in public. \*\* Too . . . many . . . jokes. Must . . . mock . . . Crunchy. ::runs away, hands over ears for Godonlyknowswhatreason:: ::the sound of punha’s head exploding can be heard off-stage:: ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/133 "2001-08-02T02:51:58Z")
Great. First my head is filled with visions of Crunchy’s balls. Now I’m imagining him as a fez wearing,winged monkey. ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_Juliet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cc9497/32.png) [@Lady\_Juliet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_Juliet)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/134 "2001-08-02T03:03:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > \*\* > Now I’m imagining him as a fez wearing,winged monkey. \*\* Lions, and tigers, and bears, Oh my! But don’t forget to look out for **Crunchy** too! He might just fly overhead and steal your dog Toto. [sub]Ya know, many parts of Planet of the Apes also reminded me of the flying monkeys from Wizard of Oz…odd [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/135 "2001-08-02T03:31:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lady Juliet \* > > Lions, and tigers, and bears, Oh my! But don’t forget to look out for **Crunchy** too! He might just fly overhead and steal your dog Toto. ::Clicks heels three times:: There’s no place like Wrigley Field. There’s no place like Wrigley Field… ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/136 "2001-08-02T03:47:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > \*\*There’s no place like Wrigley Field. There’s no place like Wrigley Field… \*\* Yeah, most ballparks have managed to house _good_ teams at some point in the last 93 years. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/137 "2001-08-02T04:12:41Z")
Ah yes, Busch Stadium. Home of the Incredible Vince Coleman Eating Tarp Roller… ::d&r:: ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/138 "2001-08-02T04:20:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > \*\*Ah yes, Busch Stadium. > > Home of the Incredible Vince Coleman Eating Tarp Roller…\*\* And again, when faced with your team’s inarguable ineptitude, you resort to the ONE Cardinal moment you can safely laugh at. You’ve brought this exact same situation up every time you want to take a dig at the Cardinals. The Cards have been around since 1882, I’m sure you can find another incident to poke fun at in all that time. As a Cubs fan, you should be used to seeing ridiculous plays on the field, so you should be able to readily recognize them. But I think a Cubs fan should be careful mocking the Cardinals, whose 9 World Series wins puts them tops in the National League and 2nd only to the Yankees in total championships. ---
**Author:** ![ARose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@ARose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ARose)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/139 "2001-08-02T04:33:04Z")
Which is, all in all, why I choose to lurk much more than I post. . . ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/140 "2001-08-02T04:35:25Z")
::Punches a fan:: That better Crunchy? ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2001, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073/141 "2001-08-02T04:35:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ARose \* > \*\*Which is, all in all, why I choose to lurk much more than I post. . . \*\* Is it my deodorant? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-new-teenaged-dopers-dont-make-me-kill-you/73073.md?page=8)