# Welcome to a new Doper, Cattitude! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 9, 2007, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234 "2007-04-09T00:02:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/21 "2007-04-09T02:17:01Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] So, can I feign newness and get a heroic poem dedicated to my sweetness or do I have to sulk? Do I have to do that thing with the goat, the squid, and the midget dressed in a bikini again? [/QUOTE] **Least Original User Name Ever** Checked the goat, checked the squid, checked the lever; Told the midget “Get dressed In that two-piece”; then pressed That “launch” button and joined us forever. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/22 "2007-04-09T02:18:47Z")
[QUOTE=enigm4tic] man, I never got a limerick either ☹ [/QUOTE] **enigm4tic** : Asks For limerick. Gets haiku Instead. Foiled again! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/23 "2007-04-09T02:40:48Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] 0 Do I have to do that thing with the goat, the squid, and the midget dressed in a bikini again? [/QUOTE] Er.. we need a new [goat](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=415581). ☹ At least he suffered less than the trebuchet one. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/24 "2007-04-09T14:43:41Z")
“Poor goats!” said **dogbutler** sadly, "How cruel that they’re treated so badly, Whether flung by a lever Or burned like a fever Some day they’ll fight back – with a [Bradley?"](http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/systems/ground/images/bradley_reactive_armor.jpg) :eek: ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/25 "2007-04-09T23:27:12Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] There once was a Doper, quite new Whose limericks stopped at line two. :). [/QUOTE] Aw, **Sunspace** , you’ve barely got started. ☹ This limerick game is lighthearted 🙂 It’s playful and silly 😉 So jump right in – really! 🆒 And make up a poem using “farted.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![enigm4tic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@enigm4tic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enigm4tic)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/26 "2007-04-09T23:28:15Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] **enigm4tic** : Asks For limerick. Gets haiku Instead. Foiled again! :mad: [/QUOTE] ☹ :eek: it’s a harsh world we live in. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2007, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/27 "2007-04-09T23:47:10Z")
[QUOTE=IvoryTowerDenizen] [sniffs] I never got a limerick…[/sniffs] [/QUOTE] Me either. Nor haiku, nor sonnet, nor quatrain, nor quintain, nor ode, nor even a lousy couplet. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/28 "2007-04-10T00:02:13Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] Aw, **Sunspace** , you’ve barely got started. ☹ This limerick game is lighthearted 🙂 It’s playful and silly 😉 So jump right in – really! 🆒 And make up a poem using “farted.” 😃 [/QUOTE] There once was a Doper, not new. Of cats she had found quite a few. She posted, did not sign Out; her cats went online. They spent the whole day going [mew](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=407483). 🙂 I am _not_ doing that in Cat. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/29 "2007-04-10T03:11:00Z")
[QUOTE=TroubleAgain] Me either. Nor haiku, nor sonnet, nor quatrain, nor quintain, nor ode, nor even a lousy couplet. [/QUOTE] A couplet for **TroubleAgain**? How sad that you never have been Even given that much Of an ego-stroke touch Let alone five full lines of refrain. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/30 "2007-04-10T15:01:45Z")
Yeeee–aaaahhhhhhhhh, that felt good! 😉 Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Millamant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@Mrs.Millamant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Millamant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/31 "2007-04-10T16:19:59Z")
Granted that I have not been posting terribly frequently, but what have I gained for my $15? No poem, not even a goat. I would like a villanelle, please. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/32 "2007-04-10T16:38:06Z")
I didn’t get no steenkin’ poetry when I joined, either. Not that I’ve been stewing over that slight ever since then, night and day, tossing and turning in bed, walking the streets lost in solitary anguish into the wee hours, no sirree, not me. For our newest Doper, though, may I say: Roses are red, The Straight Dope is fun, We all hope that **Cattitude** Will have a good run! ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/33 "2007-04-10T16:57:50Z")
[QUOTE=Mrs. Millamant] Granted that I have not been posting terribly frequently, but what have I gained for my $15? No poem, not even a goat. I would like a villanelle, please. [/QUOTE] Ahem: **Mrs. Millamant** Do not go gentle into that good Dope, Old goats should burn and rave at close of thread; Rage, rage against the posting of the Snope. Though **Mrs. Millamant** knows how to cope, Because such goats had sporked no lightning, they Do not go gentle into that good Dope Good goats, the last trot by, bleating how rope Their frail deeds might have bound in a green bay, Rage, rage against the posting of the Snope. Wild goats who prinked and baahed to calliope, And learn, too late, they butt it on its way, Do not go gentle into that good Dope. Brave goats, near **Hal** , who halt their sheepish lope, Blind ewes could blaze like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the posting of the Snope. And you, **Mrs. Millamant** , there enmeshed in hope, Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good Dope. Rage, rage against the posting of the Snope. ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Millamant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@Mrs.Millamant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Millamant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/34 "2007-04-10T17:05:46Z")
I thank you most kindly, sir and/or madam. (One doesn’t want to presume.) ---
**Author:** ![Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silence_of_the_clams)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/35 "2007-04-10T17:43:13Z")
What? No poem for **EddyTeddyFreddy** :eek: Who’s always armed with a rhyme at the ready! This clever raconteur, our poetic force majeuere, we are only lyric foals with legs so unsteady. (neighs, and stumbles over in an attempt to follow up to a trot) ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/36 "2007-04-10T17:56:59Z")
[QUOTE=Kotick] we are only lyric foals with legs so unsteady. (neighs, and stumbles over in an attempt to follow up to a trot) [/QUOTE] [😃 heh 😃](http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.greenhorsesociety.com/Sambro/3b.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.greenhorsesociety.com/Sambro/sambro_3b.htm&h=335&w=498&sz=21&hl=en&start=1&um=1&tbnid=XsgnDAFvOzFAmM:&tbnh=87&tbnw=130&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dfoal%2Bunsteady%26ndsp%3D18%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26c2coff%3D1%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26sa%3DN) ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/37 "2007-04-10T19:24:48Z")
[QUOTE=Mrs. Millamant] I thank you most kindly, sir and/or madam. (One doesn’t want to presume.) [/QUOTE] **EddyTeddyFreddy** is a [Definition #3](http://www.answers.com/madam) madam, although not (as far as I know) a Definition #5 one. As for **Kotick** , I’m guessing on the pronunciation of your name: You may see words quite exotic From the Doper who goes by **Kotick**. There’s also a new guy, **BobPi** – Hope they know to append “TMI” To postings of matters erotic. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/38 "2007-04-10T19:27:09Z")
Our dear **EddyTeddyFreddy** About us at a pace rather steady Bursts forth with verse, But it could be worse, say… odes from a big hungry yeti. Disclaimer: Any yetis mentioned in this poem are fictional works of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual **Monstres** , living or dead, is entirely coincidental. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/39 "2007-04-10T19:46:36Z")
The SDMB always invites Posters to back up with “CITES”? When it comes to photos of a cat It has been said that We’ve more pussy than some porn sites. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Understander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3da27b/32.png) [@The\_Understander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Understander)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234/40 "2007-04-10T19:56:35Z")
The poetry is nice, and all, but isn’t it time we got down to business? Now who’s got the chocolate syrup, the left-handed, turbo-powered spatula (with port and starboard attachments), and the kiddie pool? _snaps on rubber gloves_ **Cattitude** –just try and relax, m’kay? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-a-new-doper-cattitude/399234.md?page=3)