# Welcome to Beirut! (crazy neighbor rant) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 4, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818 "2007-12-04T19:42:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/1 "2007-12-04T19:42:42Z")
I love my house. It is in a rural setting, with some acreage, and sits kinda in the center of the acreage, so neighbors are not “close”. Still, these wackjobs are too close. The house next to mine was empty when I moved in. It had gone through foreclosure and from what I heard from people who looked at it, was a mess. After three years on the market, the house was purchased by my new neighbors, The Wackjobs. When I went over and introduced myself to Ms Wackjob, she told me they were gonna put up a garage. I was wondering how they could do that financially, whether they had gotten some cash as part of their mortgage or something, since I had recently purchased my home and had similar thoughts. Then, I came home and found out that [this](http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s218/vetbridge/Beirut.jpg) was what they meant by “garage”. I’ve never actually _been_ to Beirut, but now I feel I’ve been exposed to their culture. They have already outgrown the “garage”, what with their 3 lawn tractors that do not run, and the six or seven vehicles they now own. Before the property was purchased, I was mowing most of the grass, just so _my_ property didn’t look slumy. After they moved in, I continued to mow so that they could get settled. I stopped mowing midway through this past summer, and they managed to mow once. Just when I thought things couldn’t get worse, I see this [sign](http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s218/vetbridge/sign.jpg) by their driveway. Oh wow. The greened-out area says “By order of Mr Joe Wackjob” as if that gives the sign the force of law. Reminds me of [this sign](http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s218/vetbridge/keepout-1.jpg). Am I the only one out here with crazy neighbors? I know the term “cracker” is not PC, but. . .?😃 ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/2 "2007-12-04T20:17:17Z")
The “No in-laws” part makes sense to me. ---
**Author:** ![SomeUserName](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e480ec/32.png) [@SomeUserName](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SomeUserName)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/3 "2007-12-04T20:27:43Z")
Your post reminded me of this poor guy that had a neighbor from [hell](http://www.joespc.com/carlos/redneck.htm). They lived a lot closer together though so maybe you should count your blessings that you have some space. You could also call the city and see if that “garage” is up to city code. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/4 "2007-12-04T20:32:01Z")
[QUOTE=SomeUserName] You could also call the city and see if that “garage” is up to city code. [/QUOTE] Well, when I had a local contractor put a deck on the back of my house, I asked specifically about local zoning/code. His words, “The good thing about living out here is that there is minimal code/code enforcement. The bad thing about living out here is that there is minimal code/code enforcement”. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/5 "2007-12-04T20:39:48Z")
Sounds like it’s “the country”. You do what you want on your piece and I’ll do what I want on my piece. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/6 "2007-12-04T20:40:10Z")
Not currently, but when I was growing up we had some real nutbars living next door. They had a backyard full of pine trees that they had planted. They were convinced that the neighbors – specifically my mother – were poisoning the trees at night. So they put up a chain link fence around their yard and lit it all with a floodlight. It looked like a very arboreal prison yard. They were still convinced that every night, my mother would get drunk, get naked, then sneak over their fence to poison their trees. One day, another neighbor’s dog pooped in their yard. They scooped it up in a shovel, went to the neighbor’s house, opened the front door, and dropped the poop on their floor. (It should be said that they had their own dog, which I’m sure had much larger poops.) When the dad went away on business, the mom spent three days awake in a chair near the front door, shotgun at the ready. How the first and third stories got out to the general population is beyond me. I have a current neighbor who is a class A fruitloop, but I already started 3 Pit threads about him. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/7 "2007-12-04T20:40:39Z")
How much acreage? Too bad you couldn’t have bought the property cheap when the house was vacant, to expand your buffer zone. Sounds like time to start planting trees. And stocking up on bourbon! ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/8 "2007-12-04T20:52:36Z")
I have a next door neighbor who allegedly dumps his Thanksgiving and Christmas turkey carcasses in the stormwater ditch on the side of my property that is on the other side of my yard from him (the ditch is not on the property line between me and him. It is between me and the other next-door neighbor.) I haven’t seen him do it yet, but I keep looking. This is also the same guy who was plugging squirrels in his backyard and front yard with a rifle about ten years ago - before I moved there. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/9 "2007-12-04T21:00:49Z")
[QUOTE=Dinsdale] How much acreage? [/QUOTE] I only have a couple, although behind my house the woods blend in with hundreds of undeveloped forested acres. > [@](#): > > Too bad you couldn’t have bought the property cheap when the house was vacant, to expand your buffer zone. My gf thought of that when I bought my house. The bank wanted way too much money, especially considering the fact that I was gonna have the house demolished. I thought the property would sit vacant forever, considering their asking price. ☹ > [@](#): > > Sounds like time to start planting trees. 😃 I put in some weeping willows already, and will continue on that path. > [@](#): > > And stocking up on bourbon! Well, I am an amateur vintner. My cellar now has just over 300 bottles of my own Merlot, Shiraz, Banana, etc wines. And my freezer is stocked with assorted vodkas! ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/10 "2007-12-04T21:05:07Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] When the dad went away on business, the mom spent three days awake in a chair near the front door, shotgun at the ready. [/QUOTE] I knew someone like that, and I always figured either she was deranged/paranoid _or_ she lived a very interesting life. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/11 "2007-12-04T21:09:39Z")
I was wondering just where **vetbridge** lives (the no trespassing sign reminded me of good old times in eastern Kentucky). Then I saw that he’s in western Pennsylvania. I’m not too surprised. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/12 "2007-12-04T21:23:42Z")
[QUOTE=vetbridge] Well, I am an amateur vintner. My cellar now has just over 300 bottles of my own Merlot, Shiraz, Banana, etc wines. And my freezer is stocked with assorted vodkas! [/QUOTE] Brainfart on my part. I was thinking about **silenus’** bourbon-lovin’ thread over in CS. Just a matter of temporarily confusing 2 good-looking young studs in my mind. I was wondering about their “No in-laws” sign. Assuming it is a Mr. and Ms. Wackjob, exactly whose relatives are they talking about? ---
**Author:** ![Plynck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Plynck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plynck)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/13 "2007-12-04T21:28:15Z")
[QUOTE=vetbridge] I’ve never actually _been_ to Beirut, but now I feel I’ve been exposed to their culture. [/QUOTE] You mean they make you felafel? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/14 "2007-12-04T21:55:45Z")
[QUOTE=vetbridge] I knew someone like that, and I always figured either she was deranged/paranoid _or_ she lived a very interesting life. [/QUOTE] She and the husband were paranoid. I’m not sure if one turned the other that way, or if it was just something they had in common when they met. The daughter seemed OK, but my brother said she was pretty weird. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/15 "2007-12-04T22:34:35Z")
[QUOTE=Plynck] You mean they make you felafel? [/QUOTE] 😃 Touche` BTW, to any Beirutians out there: no offense intended! Lilliputians as well. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/16 "2007-12-04T22:55:34Z")
[QUOTE=vetbridge] Then, I came home and found out that [this](http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s218/vetbridge/Beirut.jpg) was what they meant by “garage”. [/QUOTE] You can call me white trash, but well, I don’t think that thing is _that_ bad. If you’re living in a rural area, and I assume you are, you have to go with it. The particle board walls are bad, but that’s a solid aluminum structure meant to protect tractors. It’s what they’re using it for. If you want “Better Homes and Gardens” move to suburbia. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/17 "2007-12-04T22:59:27Z")
[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun] You can call me white trash, but well, I don’t think that thing is _that_ bad. If you’re living in a rural area, and I assume you are, you have to go with it. The particle board walls are bad, but that’s a solid aluminum structure meant to protect tractors. It’s what they’re using it for. If you want “Better Homes and Gardens” move to suburbia. [/QUOTE] I’m guessing those structures aren’t very common up north. I’m in the south and you see them all over the place here. I never saw one with particle board walls on, though. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/18 "2007-12-04T23:01:14Z")
Crap, this was supposed to go on the end of my above post. They’re not nutjobs, and you don’t live in [Beirut](http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2006/07/18/world/18cnd_beirut.html), so get over it. That’s for the OP, not \*_telperion_. I’m shrugging because I see that type of things in rural areas too. Where else are you going to keep the tractors? ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/19 "2007-12-04T23:04:07Z")
[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun] You can call me white trash, but well, I don’t think that thing is _that_ bad. If you’re living in a rural area, and I assume you are, you have to go with it. The particle board walls are bad, but that’s a solid aluminum structure meant to protect tractors. It’s what they’re using it for. If you want “Better Homes and Gardens” move to suburbia. [/QUOTE] Carports are very common around here. I was bitching about the particle board. I’ve never seen that particular “upgrade”. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818/20 "2007-12-04T23:14:13Z")
[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun] They’re not nutjobs, and you don’t live in [Beirut](http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2006/07/18/world/18cnd_beirut.html), so get over it. [/QUOTE] Hmmmm. You really don’t see [it?](http://s153.photobucket.com/albums/s218/vetbridge/?action=view¤t=960ae7bd.pbr) :dubious: 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-beirut-crazy-neighbor-rant/428818.md?page=2)