# Welcome to hell Jihadi John, please take a seat on the nearest burner. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 14, 2015, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520 "2015-11-14T02:51:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2015, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/61 "2015-11-15T23:22:00Z")
Recreational outrage. Heard of it? This is the PIT. There are some perfectly good threads out in GD for debating ISIS. This is where we piss on shit stains, and feed body parts to pigs. Occasionally we threaten to wrap them in bacon. No reason. Except he was an execrable human being who took pleasure in the suffering of others. A sadist. His death is a victory. Pull up a burner indeed. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2015, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/62 "2015-11-16T00:06:50Z")
It’s times like this I wish there was a Hell. ETA: Um, for Jihadi John, not **John Mace** and **Morgenstern**. That would be a different time. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2015, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/63 "2015-11-16T02:21:24Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > If you weren’t intent on ignoring logic and, like a drunk, stumbling around in a topic looking for an alley to get lost in, I’d engage you. But keeping you focused would require a team of competent doctors and a cabinet full of modern drugs, and a pair of blinders. Certainly one of the most witty rebuttals I have ever heard. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2015, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/64 "2015-11-16T03:44:36Z")
> [@ddsun](#): > > Recreational outrage. Heard of it? This is the PIT. There are some perfectly good threads out in GD for debating ISIS. This is where we piss on shit stains, and feed body parts to pigs. Occasionally we threaten to wrap them in bacon. No reason. Except he was an execrable human being who took pleasure in the suffering of others. A sadist. His death is a victory. Pull up a burner indeed. Yeah, with all respect to John Donne, I feel myself and humanity undiminished by the abrupt discontinuation of this individual’s existence. And I just had a couple more pints of beer so his remains are due for irrigation again… ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2015, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/65 "2015-11-16T04:38:15Z")
> [@ZebraShaSha](#): > > A caliphate is a state that’s run with the strictest, letter-of-the-law interpretation of Islam possible, and according to the Koran, if a caliphate exists and you don’t declare allegiance to it, you’re not a true Muslim, aka you’re dead… > > …For instance, a caliphate has really strict rules for existing. The caliph – the Pope, if you will – can only exist if it has “authority” to exist. As in, it has to have land. If you take away the land, the caliphate no longer exists… > > …the Koran says for a caliphate to exist, there must be an international consensus in the Muslim community that it has a legitimate right to exist and as of right now… Yeah, none of this is actually the case. The Qur’an by itself says nothing in particular about Caliphs except that they are appointed by God. Muhammad wasn’t terribly specific about what he wanted to follow him ( there are hints and educated guesses, but nothing explicit ) and that’s why you had fission in Islam almost from the get go - the succession was a contentious issue. There is NO equanimity among Muslims about who had the right to be declared Caliph and under what circumstances. Indeed the fact that through history a goodly number of declared Caliphs ( the vast majority, actually ) were hereditary monarchs kinda shits on the idea of an elected ruler. And the added fact that there have often been multiple rival Caliphs in existence at the same time kinda puts paid to the idea of the Caliph as unitary ruler. Just as an example [Mirza Masroor Ahmad](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mirza_Masroor_Ahmad) has rather different ideas than Daesh about who should be Caliph. Understandable since he was elected to the post by his faithful back in 2003, pre-dating Abu Bakr Baghdadi’s claim by a good 11 years ;). Daesh obviously views everything through a particular ideological lens, which is why you shouldn’t make the mistake of assuming their view of _anything_ is normative. Usually it won’t be. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2015, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520/66 "2015-11-16T14:03:08Z")
> [@Trinopus](#): > > Allah isn’t a fucking God. He never so much as fucked anyone, even once. He does not beget. > > Dionysus – now there’s a fucking God! Hail Dionysos! “If only we were heathen so we could all live together like good Christians!” – old Irish joke [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/welcome-to-hell-jihadi-john-please-take-a-seat-on-the-nearest-burner/737520.md?page=3)