# Well, I came unglued. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 11, 2007, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377 "2007-07-11T16:19:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/21 "2007-07-11T17:36:14Z")
Dayum. I’ve read of all the troubles you’ve been having over the past year, but until now Dr. Boss has mostly just been this absent, negligent dude who doesn’t really give a damn if the lab implodes. But apparently he’s an absent, negligent dude who doesn’t really give a damn if the lab implodes _and_ he’s a chauvinist asshole. Sadly, if this Old Boys Club exists beyond him your complaints might just end up being filed under “contentious, whiny ex-employee.” (Also known as the “round file.”) It’s a shame it all blew up like this, but good on you standing up to the asshat like that. I don’t like burning bridges either, but there are just some times when it just has to be done, and some people who really need to be standing on it when you do. Goodbye and good riddance to him, I say. Whatever comes of it, you’re better off without him and that whole lousy situation. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/22 "2007-07-11T17:44:06Z")
God, he sounds like my Post doc advisor. What a tool she was (and it was because I got pregnant on my timeline, not hers). Good for you getting out, with your dignity intact. Precious few can claim that. Look for work, even while pregnant- you might be surprised that some folks are more accomodating than you might think. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/23 "2007-07-11T17:59:30Z")
[QUOTE=Caricci] Seconded. [/QUOTE] Thirded. Don’t let him get away with this crap. We’d live in a very different (and, IMO, much better) world if chauvinists got called on it every time they say or do something like this. “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” I don’t think you have to worry about burning bridges, either- “You’re useless to me” sounds like Dr. Boss already burned that bridge for you. ---
**Author:** ![burundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3ec8ea/32.png) [@burundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burundi)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/24 "2007-07-11T18:15:20Z")
Nail that bastard to the wall, **Mouse**. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/25 "2007-07-11T18:19:41Z")
Fourthed. File whatever complaints may be available (HR, ethics, EEOC, etc…) and make sure you don’t get screwed out of any of your sick time, vacation, etc. The phrase “hostile work environment” really applies to this one. ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/26 "2007-07-11T18:21:06Z")
Just what the country needs: more litigation. **Mouse** , walk away. Document your professional experiences into a cogent paragraph on your CV and move on. You’re not going to beat the good ole boy network by suing one moron. In fact, you won’t beat it if you sue a 1000 of them. ---
**Author:** ![Flea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d78d45/32.png) [@Flea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flea)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/27 "2007-07-11T18:23:31Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Just what the country needs: more litigation. **Mouse** , walk away. Document your professional experiences into a cogent paragraph on your CV and move on. You’re not going to beat the good ole boy network by suing one moron. In fact, you won’t beat it if you sue a 1000 of them. [/QUOTE] Well, she definitely won’t do it by not even trying to hold him of some measure of accountability, that’s for sure. This isn’t like suing because her McDonald’s coffee is too hot. This is the whole reason EEOC exists. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/28 "2007-07-11T18:23:51Z")
Just… take care of the Mouseling too. But this may be the best way. I keep thinking of a friend, who has all the right in the world to take her building inspector and designer (whose incompetence threatens her half-completed house) to a hearing before the Ministry of Housing, but the stress of that hearing would put her over the edge. Justice is good, but you have to be strong enough to withstand the process as well. ---
**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/29 "2007-07-11T18:26:00Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Just what the country needs: more litigation. **Mouse** , walk away. Document your professional experiences into a cogent paragraph on your CV and move on. You’re not going to beat the good ole boy network by suing one moron. In fact, you won’t beat it if you sue a 1000 of them. [/QUOTE] Now, I admit I’ve followed this saga in a train wreck sort of way, and I have little sympathy for the situation, but I think this attitude is, well, realistic if you’re talking about one little person. Okay, fine, but what if everyone stood up for their rights against the old boy network? Well, one day it would be a thing of the past! ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/30 "2007-07-11T18:28:51Z")
[QUOTE=Flea] Well, she definitely won’t do it by not even trying to hold him of some measure of accountability, that’s for sure. This isn’t like suing because her McDonald’s coffee is too hot. This is the whole reason EEOC exists. [/QUOTE] Meh. He made a chauvinistic comment. Big deal. He’s a turd. So what, she was quitting anyway. She didn’t get fired because the guy didn’t like women. Hell, she wasn’t even passed over for a promotion. He made a comment about her being pregnant. That’s it. End of story. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/31 "2007-07-11T18:29:04Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] Damn. I’m not usually a litigious person, but that ALMOST makes me wish you hadn’t resigned, so you could sue his ass for wrongful termination. What an asshat to mention the pregnancy! Fuck him. You’re well rid of him. [/QUOTE] he probably did it to provoke her into quitting, saving himself some money and avoiding some legal jeopardy. He’s got a huge karmic debt to pay, but asshats don’t care about karmic debt. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/32 "2007-07-11T18:31:30Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Meh. He made a chauvinistic comment. Big deal. He’s a turd. So what, she was quitting anyway. She didn’t get fired because the guy didn’t like women. Hell, she wasn’t even passed over for a promotion. He made a comment about her being pregnant. That’s it. End of story. [/QUOTE] But perhaps a complaint now would make him think twice next time? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/33 "2007-07-11T18:31:43Z")
She may not beat the whole old boy network. But as Caricci and Flea both say, it’s NEVER going to be beat if everyone takes this attitude. Litigation is a useful and necessary thing and it’s the only way for some of us to bring a situation to light. Yes, there are stupid lawsuits; this is not one of them. FTR, the McDonald’s one wasn’t stupid either. They were proven to have their coffee at ridiculously high temperatures. [Link](http://lawandhelp.com/q298-2.htm) > [@](#): > > McFact No. 1: For years, McDonald’s had known they had a problem with the way they make their coffee - that their coffee was served much hotter (at least 20 degrees more so) than at other restaurants. > > McFact No. 2: McDonald’s knew its coffee sometimes caused serious injuries - more than 700 incidents of scalding coffee burns in the past decade have been settled by the Corporation - and yet they never so much as consulted a burn expert regarding the issue. > > McFact No. 3: The woman involved in this infamous case suffered very serious injuries - third degree burns on her groin, thighs and buttocks that required skin grafts and a seven-day hospital stay. > > McFact No. 4: The woman, an 81-year old former department store clerk who had never before filed suit against anyone, said she wouldn’t have brought the lawsuit against McDonald’s had the Corporation not dismissed her request for compensation for medical bills. > > McFact No. 5: A McDonald’s quality assurance manager testified in the case that the Corporation was aware of the risk of serving dangerously hot coffee and had no plans to either turn down the heat or to post warning about the possibility of severe burns, even though most customers wouldn’t think it was possible. > > McFact No. 6: After careful deliberation, the jury found McDonald’s was liable because the facts were overwhelmingly against the company. When it came to the punitive damages, the jury found that McDonald’s had engaged in willful, reckless, malicious, or wanton conduct, and rendered a punitive damage award of 2.7 million dollars. (The equivalent of just two days of coffee sales, McDonalds Corporation generates revenues in excess of 1.3 million dollars daily from the sale of its coffee, selling 1 billion cups each year.) ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/34 "2007-07-11T18:35:12Z")
[QUOTE=Caricci] Now, I admit I’ve followed this saga in a train wreck sort of way, and I have little sympathy for the situation, but I think this attitude is, well, realistic if you’re talking about one little person. Okay, fine, but what if everyone stood up for their rights against the old boy network? Well, one day it would be a thing of the past! [/QUOTE] Optimistically, sure. But realistically? I don’t see it. Too many people are overly concerned with their agendas; if aligning with others of the same ilk protects that personal agenda, then the network remains connected. ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/35 "2007-07-11T18:41:08Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] But perhaps a complaint now would make him think twice next time? [/QUOTE] A complaint, sure, no problem. Let HR investigate and deal with it. Someone mentioned suing is what prompted my initial post. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/36 "2007-07-11T18:42:21Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Meh. He made a chauvinistic comment. Big deal. He’s a turd. So what, she was quitting anyway. She didn’t get fired because the guy didn’t like women. Hell, she wasn’t even passed over for a promotion. He made a comment about her being pregnant. That’s it. End of story. [/QUOTE] Dr. Boss made a potentially illegal statement about **Mouse Maven** ’s fitness for work, in a subject area directly addressed by the EEOC. I support filing a complaint with the EEOC and the state’s equivalent; their contact information is on the labor law poster that is supposed to be prominently displayed, usually in the break or mail room. And there’s bonus points here because Dr. Boss made the statement in front of witnesses, if I read the OP correctly. ---
**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/37 "2007-07-11T18:42:25Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Optimistically, sure. But realistically? I don’t see it. Too many people are overly concerned with their agendas; if aligning with others of the same ilk protects that personal agenda, then the network remains connected. [/QUOTE] The attitude that one person isn’t going to change things is what’s realistic. ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/38 "2007-07-11T18:45:01Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] She may not beat the whole old boy network. But as Caricci and Flea both say, it’s NEVER going to be beat if everyone takes this attitude. Litigation is a useful and necessary thing and it’s the only way for some of us to bring a situation to light. Yes, there are stupid lawsuits; this is not one of them. FTR, the McDonald’s one wasn’t stupid either. They were proven to have their coffee at ridiculously high temperatures. [Link](http://lawandhelp.com/q298-2.htm) [/QUOTE] Actually, see my previous post. IANAL, but I’m pretty certain there needs to be more than a disparaging remark about one’s pregnancy for a suit to be filed. Especially when an action didn’t follow – termination, demotion, decrease in wage, etc. All he did was make a lame comment. Lawyers, chime in if I’m wrong. ---
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/39 "2007-07-11T18:47:21Z")
[QUOTE=Scuba\_Ben] Dr. Boss made a potentially illegal statement about **Mouse Maven** ’s fitness for work, in a subject area directly addressed by the EEOC. I support filing a complaint with the EEOC and the state’s equivalent; their contact information is on the labor law poster that is supposed to be prominently displayed, usually in the break or mail room. And there’s bonus points here because Dr. Boss made the statement in front of witnesses, if I read the OP correctly. [/QUOTE] An illegal statement? Huh? Is there such a thing? Cite? He didn’t say, “Because you’re pregnant, I’m curtailing your duties and decreasing your pay.” ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377/40 "2007-07-11T18:49:45Z")
[QUOTE=DudleyGarrett] Actually, see my previous post. IANAL, but I’m pretty certain there needs to be more than a disparaging remark about one’s pregnancy for a suit to be filed. Especially when an action didn’t follow – termination, demotion, decrease in wage, etc. All he did was make a lame comment. Lawyers, chime in if I’m wrong. [/QUOTE] Not a lawyer, but I agree. Since she already sent the letter of resignation, and there are no real damages, all he is is an asshole. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-i-came-unglued/411377.md?page=3)