# Well, I'm now ripe for mockery **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 8, 2005, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502 "2005-03-08T04:50:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2005, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/21 "2005-03-08T18:27:48Z")
Oh, CynicalGabe, I would never _snrk_ ever _snort_ ever laugh at you _giggle_… I… _mmmph_… _gives in_ Bwhahaahahahahahahahah! 😃 Seriously, turn it into a pimp cane. You could rock the city, I’m telling you! ---
**Author:** ![Iceland\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@Iceland\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iceland_Blue)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2005, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/22 "2005-03-08T18:30:38Z")
_Nelson Muntz voice_ Haw-haw! ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/23 "2005-03-09T00:01:05Z")
[whoosh] [crack] / **Iceland\_Blue** never sees it coming. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Iceland\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@Iceland\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iceland_Blue)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/24 "2005-03-09T00:04:27Z")
Actually that whoosh crack was the noise as CynicalGabe went to hit me with his cane,lost his balance,tottered over and flattened me,whilst his cane had enough momentum to strike the lamppost with a resounding clang 🙂 Now get up,I’m squashed ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/25 "2005-03-09T03:28:58Z")
> [@Foible](#): > > … > > If you don’t like the implications of using a cane you might try a walking stick. I used to hike with a six foot maple staff. My grip was different than with a cane, I held it at a little below shoulder height and hung off it more than leaned on it. It seemed more stable than trying to keep my wrist, elbow, and shoulder rigid. With one of those at hand anyone mocking you had better be at least seven feet away. I was trying those out this weekend at The Walking Store or whatever the heck they call it. They made me feel like…Gandalf. Come to think of it not too many people mocked HIM. I agree with **Rebekkah** , the OP has good taste. The one in the first link especially. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/26 "2005-03-09T04:08:57Z")
> [@Laughing Lagomorph](#): > > I agree with **Rebekkah** , the OP has good taste. The one in the first link especially. Thank the CynicalGf. ---
**Author:** ![The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_King_of_Soup)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/27 "2005-03-09T05:48:11Z")
You have a walking stick appropriate for formal occasions? That’s not mockery. That’s chicanery. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/28 "2005-03-09T05:51:55Z")
> [@The King of Soup](#): > > That’s not mockery. That’s chicanery. ba-dum-bum. ---
**Author:** ![Keapon\_Laffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e274bd/32.png) [@Keapon\_Laffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keapon_Laffin)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/29 "2005-03-09T05:58:36Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > You are a superhero, aren’t you? No no no. A cane makes for a much better villain. All he needs is a bad accent, a maniacal laugh and plans to build a Death-Ray. Hey, **CynicalGabe** , can you practice saying “Well, well, well. We meet again, Mr. Bond.” ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/30 "2005-03-09T06:29:17Z")
> [@Keapon Laffin](#): > > No no no. A cane makes for a much better villain. > All he needs is a bad accent, a maniacal laugh and plans to build a Death-Ray. I _did_ find some plans on the internet for a 1920’s style one. Someone had to say it. Just thought I’d be the first. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/31 "2005-03-09T14:37:34Z")
WWDDBD? He brings down his walking stalf with a might crash _crash_ WWTD What would DR. Donald Blake, whoops, I mean Thor, God of Thunder Do? ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/32 "2005-03-09T19:31:22Z")
When I was having problems with my back I would take a 5 foot alpine stick (sans alpine spike) wherever I went. It makes me feel less old than having a cane, I was in my mid twenties at the time. It proved excellent for intimidating Italian drivers when crossing the road in Rome. Also prostitutes on the street in Montmatre (sp?) in France said something in French which sounded to my English ears like you have a big stick and I guess was a double-entendre. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/33 "2005-03-09T19:51:48Z")
> [@Keapon Laffin](#): > > No no no. A cane makes for a much better villain. > All he needs is a bad accent, a maniacal laugh and plans to build a Death-Ray. > > Hey, **CynicalGabe** , can you practice saying “Well, well, well. We meet again, Mr. Bond.” You also need a snooty white cat. And an eyepatch. Maybe a snooty white cat with an eyepatch? ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502/34 "2005-03-09T23:47:48Z")
> [@Jenaroph](#): > > You also need a snooty white cat. [Check](http://www.gabemartinez.com/kashi.jpg) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-im-now-ripe-for-mockery/293502.md?page=1)