# Well, looks like maybe I'm not a Jew after all **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 3, 2004, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840 "2004-11-03T20:52:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/1 "2004-11-03T20:52:11Z")
Way back in 2000 I thought I had learned that I had a Jewish ancestor, whom I was connected to via a purely maternal line. I made the following thread: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=11778&page=1&pp=50&highlight=israel](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=11778&page=1&pp=50&highlight=israel) (warning: this thread is so old the msgs are displayed in the wrong order, so it’s tough to make sense of it) I learned in that thread that since the line was purely maternal, by Jewish tradition I was as Jewish as anybody. Well, the only way my life really changed was that I felt freer to make Cartman-esque Jewish jokes to a Jewish friend of mine. Yeah, kinda like on that Seinfeld episode. Well guess what? I found out last weekend that my grandmother looked into it further, and now she says this ancestor was not Jewish. I don’t know the details, but now she says we are not Jewish in any way. I’ll try to get details from my grandmother this Christmas, but she’s not the easiest person to communicate with. I may never actually get a straight answer on this. Not that it’s hugely important or anything, I’d just like to get the facts about my ancestry. ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/2 "2004-11-03T23:37:31Z")
Damnit. Now I have to return all your Channukah gifts. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/3 "2004-11-04T00:19:01Z")
That sucks. I’m not too happy about the Moyel coming by later to sew my foreskin back on, either. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/4 "2004-11-04T00:41:39Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > That sucks. I’m not too happy about the Moyel coming by later to sew my foreskin back on, either. Well, you could always try the Tug-Ahoy! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/5 "2004-11-04T00:46:47Z")
If all the tugging on it I’ve already done hasn’t made it come back… ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/6 "2004-11-04T04:00:57Z")
Please return your key to the International Jewish Conspiracy Clubhouse at once. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/7 "2004-11-04T06:23:16Z")
The Gentiles: Just when you think you’ve got out, we pull you back in. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/8 "2004-11-04T07:49:55Z")
> [@Snooooopy](#): > > Please return your key to the International Jewish Conspiracy Clubhouse at once. and your Elders of Zion decoder ring! ---
**Author:** ![LeeshaJoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@LeeshaJoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LeeshaJoy)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-looks-like-maybe-im-not-a-jew-after-all/272840/9 "2004-11-04T08:01:55Z")
The Rabbis in Black will be arriving shortly for your “debriefing.”