# "Well smack my ass and call me Sally!"...WTF? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 14, 2004, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146 "2004-07-14T21:36:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/21 "2004-07-15T12:55:08Z")
Then there’s “Well suck me dry and call me Dusty!” Not terribly clear about that one either… ---
**Author:** ![Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/41988e/32.png) [@Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dazzling_White_Diamonds)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/22 "2004-07-15T13:36:58Z")
I’ve always said, “Well smack my ass and call me **Judy**!”… but I have no more of a clue how that saying came about than anyone else here does. I do love the responses I get when I say it, though. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Means\_Go](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cc9497/32.png) [@Green\_Means\_Go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Means_Go)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/23 "2004-07-15T14:38:03Z")
> [@](#): > > Why do I think that the next line is “No, really. Please. I mean it.” Just a little peril… Here’s mine: Well Crap in a bucket and call it Gravy! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/24 "2004-07-15T14:42:37Z")
Not quite the same, but my favorite is “Well, I’ll be dipped in bunny shit!” ---
**Author:** ![Amberlei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Amberlei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amberlei)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/25 "2004-07-15T14:55:05Z")
I’ve always heard it as “Well slap me silly and call me Sally.” No idea where it originated from. I’m gonna start using the “butter my buns and call me a biscuit.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/26 "2004-07-15T15:37:28Z")
Well, dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians! (or my favourite:) Well, slap my face and call me Zsa Zsa! ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/27 "2004-07-15T15:54:38Z")
> [@AvhHines](#): > > Grammar hijack: When you end a question with a quoted sentence that is _not_ a question, how do you properly punctuate? I know that normally the punctuation does inside the quotation marks. But here, you actually need two punctuaters - one for the quote, one for the sentence (question). Question marks and exclamation points may go inside or outside of quotation marks as needed. Have fun. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/28 "2004-07-15T16:53:19Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > Question marks and exclamation points may go inside or outside of quotation marks as needed. Have fun. Really? Well dip me in shit and call me Hershey! ---
**Author:** ![RobJames](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c4cdca/32.png) [@RobJames](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobJames)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2024, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/29 "2024-04-02T19:21:56Z")
My granddad was a cattle farmer in Oklahoma and he used to say “well, slap me silly and shave me naked!”. Always made my chuckle. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2024, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/30 "2024-04-02T19:44:59Z")
> [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](#): > > Speaking as the ambassador from the American South, ‘Sally,’ or ‘Sal’ are two traditional names for mules. Does that in any way help? Not just the South. “I’ve got an old mule, her name is Sal / Fifteen miles on the Erie Canal” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2024, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/31 "2024-04-02T19:46:49Z")
My Daddy always said 'Kiss my ass, and call me stupid" ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2024, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/32 "2024-04-03T00:56:51Z")
my goto phrase is “_Well, fuck . me . sideways …_” (in a somewhat weird, drawn out southener’s accent) I like its compactness, no calling needed … especially when resurrecting a zombie ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2024, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/33 "2024-04-03T06:10:51Z")
It’s a known formulation on this side of the Atlantic too. My mother would sometimes express surprise with “Well, bugger me gently!”, and in a completely different context I’ve heard, as a sarcastic remark on someone overfond of leather-and-chains fetishwear, “Well, whip me, beat me, call me Betty!” ---
**Author:** ![TCMF-2L](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tcmf-2l/32/16553_2.png) [@TCMF-2L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TCMF-2L)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2024, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/34 "2024-04-04T15:38:43Z")
In my part of the UK you used to hear “Don’t piss on my shoes and tell me it’s raining” Other urine related expressions being “I wouldn’t piss on you (even) if you were on fire” “I wouldn’t give you the steam off my piss” TCMF-2L ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2024, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/35 "2024-04-04T16:57:31Z")
Courtesy of Unca Cecil: I wouldn’t piss on your ass if your piles were on fire! ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2024, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/36 "2024-04-04T17:02:18Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Not just the South. “I’ve got an old mule, her name is Sal / Fifteen miles on the Erie Canal” I still remember every word of that song from elementary school. ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2024, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/37 "2024-04-04T22:25:56Z")
Didn’t Bob Newhart say the slap-Sally bit in his standup routine? ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2024, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/38 "2024-04-05T05:49:43Z")
> [@TCMF-2L](#): > > Other urine related expressions [Of a particularly ugly face] “Like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle” ---
**Author:** ![TCMF-2L](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tcmf-2l/32/16553_2.png) [@TCMF-2L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TCMF-2L)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2024, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/39 "2024-04-05T07:14:00Z")
> Blockquote That’s a familiar one now you’ve reminded me. Other ‘face’ ones include “Face like a slapped / spanked arse” and “Face like a welder’s bench.” TCMF-2L ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2024, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146/40 "2024-04-05T07:42:38Z")
‘Well, stap my vitals!’ Is an exclamation of surprise from around 1700. I wonder how far back this form of speech can be traced. Is ‘bless my soul’ older? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-smack-my-ass-and-call-me-sally-wtf/255146.md?page=3)