# Well, that was awkward. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 13, 2014, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579 "2014-11-13T23:33:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Red\_Barchetta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/da6949/32.png) [@Red\_Barchetta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Barchetta)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/1 "2014-11-13T23:33:39Z")
So I’m at my favorite coffee ready to pay for my drink, and as I walk up to the cashier, I grab a pastry from the top of the display and wave it at her as I approach. I then tell her what coffee ordered and she asks “Is that all?” I said yes, assuming she saw me grab the pastry. “That’ll be 4 dollars.” So now I know she didn’t count the pastry. I pointed it out to her and said “Sorry, I thought you saw me grab it?” “I did. But I was going to let you get away with it.” So I’m completely perplexed and a bit embarrassed by this, because the implication is that I’m a thief (despite me waving it at her). Why did she not add it to my tally automatically if she saw me grab it? Was she seriously going to let me get away with it despite her seeing me take it? Or was she testing me to see if I would mention it, then make a scene if I hadn’t? I’m really confused by this entire thing… ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/2 "2014-11-13T23:38:25Z")
Privately owned place, or a Starbucks (for example)? ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Barchetta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/da6949/32.png) [@Red\_Barchetta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Barchetta)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/3 "2014-11-13T23:41:13Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Privately owned place, or a Starbucks (for example)? It’s a smallish, but extremely popular chain. Maybe 1-2 dozen locations? ---
**Author:** ![sitchensis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sitchensis/32/4892_2.png) [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/4 "2014-11-13T23:42:37Z")
If she recognized you as a repeat customer, then she was just giving you a free pastry. She could have been flirting, but only if a thousand other variables match up. ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/5 "2014-11-13T23:51:34Z")
Best guess: she was distracted and didn’t see you wave the pastry. So when she ashed “is that all”?, she was expecting you to mention it. When you didn’t, she got flustered, and decided to write it off, rather than risk calling you a thief or even just adding it to the bill. Not great customer service skills. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/6 "2014-11-13T23:54:28Z")
I’m going for “Was comping you the pastry as a ‘regular’ and was being cute about how she explained it”. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/7 "2014-11-13T23:59:00Z")
What’s the end of the story? Did she make you pay for it? If she made you pay for it, she was just covering for her mistake. She saw you grab it, but then didn’t think to charge you for it. If she rang it up without the pastry, you could have claimed that she knew about it, so you shouldn’t have to pay. But the implication there is that you’re a thief if you don’t mention it, so she put the burden on you. If she didn’t make you pay for it even after you brought it to her attention, then she really meant to give you a freebie. ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Barchetta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/da6949/32.png) [@Red\_Barchetta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Barchetta)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2014, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/8 "2014-11-13T23:59:38Z")
> [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](#): > > What’s the end of the story? Did she make you pay for it? I paid for it Edit: Although interestingly, she had to ask for help in how to ring up the particular seasonal pastry I grabbed. Related? ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/9 "2014-11-14T00:22:58Z")
> [@Red\_Barchetta](#): > > I paid for it > > Edit: Although interestingly, she had to ask for help in how to ring up the particular seasonal pastry I grabbed. Related? Bingo. I’ve had to learn this because it didn’t happen much where I used to live. If the cashier isn’t that good at their job, they’ll try to cover it up by placing the blame on the customer. Their ability to cover their mistake is lightning fast, so that part feels baffling. But when I think about it, covering their mistakes is a learned thing that happens more often than getting it right, so they should be good at it. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/10 "2014-11-14T00:24:50Z")
> [@Red\_Barchetta](#): > > I paid for it > > Edit: Although interestingly, she had to ask for help in how to ring up the particular seasonal pastry I grabbed. Related? Sounds related. She didn’t know how to ring it in and couldn’t have been bothered. Besides, what did it cost $2? They probably throw out 50 times that amount every day. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/11 "2014-11-14T00:32:30Z")
Did she smile when she said she was going to let you get away with it? I’d take that as being playful/funny or just possibly flirty if you’ve spoken before. ---
**Author:** ![araminty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5e925/32.png) [@araminty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/araminty)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/12 "2014-11-14T00:49:41Z")
Are these pastries intended to be self-serve? If not, don’t do that again. ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Barchetta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/da6949/32.png) [@Red\_Barchetta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Barchetta)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/13 "2014-11-14T00:51:28Z")
> [@araminty](#): > > Are these pastries intended to be self-serve? If not, don’t do that again. Well, it was individually wrapped and on top of the case, as opposed to the rest which are not wrapped and behind the case, requiring assistance. Am I mistaken that I’m not supposed to grab that? ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/14 "2014-11-14T01:42:41Z")
> [@Red\_Barchetta](#): > > Well, it was individually wrapped and on top of the case, as opposed to the rest which are not wrapped and behind the case, requiring assistance. > > Am I mistaken that I’m not supposed to grab that? Yeah, I’d say if it’s wrapped and out where you can reach it, then you’re expected to help yourself. A perfectly reasonable assumption to make. If she needed help just to ring the darn thing up, she probably didn’t know that, either. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/15 "2014-11-14T18:10:21Z")
Has she previously showed an interest in your éclair? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/16 "2014-11-14T19:40:52Z")
> [@Red\_Barchetta](#): > > Well, it was individually wrapped and on top of the case, as opposed to the rest which are not wrapped and behind the case, requiring assistance. > > Am I mistaken that I’m not supposed to grab that? You are not supposed to grab those. Those are set out to catch thieves. The cashier was gonna let you walk off with the pasty and then call the cops. ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2014, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/17 "2014-11-14T19:51:14Z")
Well, she tried. You should have just smiled and said thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Barking\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Barking\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barking_Dog)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2014, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/18 "2014-11-15T01:22:25Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Sounds related. She didn’t know how to ring it in and couldn’t have been bothered. Or may have been embarrassed about asking for help to ring it up. I know I’d be if in her place. Do you know if she’s a new hire? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2014, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/well-that-was-awkward/704579/19 "2014-11-15T05:22:48Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > You are not supposed to grab those. Those are set out to catch thieves. The cashier was gonna let you walk off with the pasty and then call the cops. Diabolical!