# We're going to war with Britian!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2000, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616 "2000-11-25T04:20:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/61 "2000-11-27T04:43:53Z")
> [@](#): > > Dutch new herring is not edible?? > Them’s fighting words, **Burger Boy**! Hey! Canal-water-breath! This just shows that cultural (bad) assumptions proliferate on both sides of the Atlantic. I’m not particularly fond of burgers (no matter how big their cities are). I do enjoy the aforementioned Coney Dogs, the occasional burrito, a bit of Szechuan Kung Pao Chi Ding, and the periodic Rijstafel, (maybe _friten met mayo_ for a late night snack, staggering home from the local brew-pub), but I only eat burgers when that’s what is being served up at a picnic. If you want to fight over eating Dutch New Herring, you go ahead. I’ll bet on the herring. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/62 "2000-11-27T04:46:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bagkitty \* > \*\*Muffin, Muffin, Muffin… we vote on Monday, not Tuesday. \*\* Sorry bagkitty, but I must respectfully disagree. We do not vote for the US President on Monday, for on Monday we vote for the Canadian Prime Minister. Only upon securing the leadership of our own nation can we then on Tuesday we vote for the US President. There is no date yet set for the next Quebec separation referendum, and there is no date set for the Doris Day referendum, however, advance voting is already taking place for the latter at [http://www.22minutes.com](http://www.22minutes.com) . (For you folks not familiar with Canadian politics, our most right leaning political party leader is facing a national referendum to change his name to Doris Day – over a million Canadians have already voted for the change). ---
**Author:** ![bagkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ab992/32.png) [@bagkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bagkitty)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/63 "2000-11-27T06:29:56Z")
Hey there corvus. I think I should be a little miffed that you pinched my regular handle, but what the hell – live and let live. If, by chance, you find yourself in a chatroom and all the other chatters turn on you for something you have said in the past you can safely assume that you are in one of my regular haunts. I suggest you either flee immediately, or get real bitchy… if you do it right they will think you are me. You can always cover “memory lapses” by claiming to have forgotten to take your meds… All I request is that you don’t randomly attack newbies, when I am using the handle I usually have that amount of sel-restraint. So, nice to be addressed by my doppelganger (damn, where is that prescription bottle?) ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/64 "2000-11-27T17:12:43Z")
As the retort said, “You guys (england) couldn’t effectively quash a rebellion in the Falklands” makes me think you are no match for the US. ---
**Author:** ![nadin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/46a35a/32.png) [@nadin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nadin)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/65 "2000-11-27T20:24:38Z")
We have a Welsh National choir who combined with the likes of Shirley Bassey, Tom Jones (ignoring the fact that he actually lives in the US) Charlotte Church would blow any invasion anyway by the sheer power of their vocal chords. And if not, deafen them all so they’re on a par with the British army, who can’t afford radios that work. We have people in kilts who will scare you away with their bagpipe music and dancing with swords. We have Essex girls and Newcastle girls who can go out in all weather wearing short tight white dresses and white shoes who can out drink you, out swear you and out fight you on any terms you care to mention. Above all, we have our politicians for cannon fodder and the likes of Ken Clarke to be held as hostages who will drive you all to suicide by never answering a question and plugging the Tory party instead, Tony Blair, Michael Portillo - scary hair gel man and Anne Widdecome. Come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough. ---
**Author:** ![madmark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@madmark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmark)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/66 "2000-11-27T21:15:25Z")
\*\* News at 11 \*\* The conflict escalates. Luxembourgh threatens to invade Germany … more to follow More on the national front: Florida’s covert plan to separate themselves from the US, as shown in the national election, is proceeding according to state plans. State Secratary to issue a press conference later tonight. Meanwhile, Key West is re-enacting their failed struggle to segregate from Florida in a desparate strugggle to attain independence. Statements on the plans and status to be displayed at Sloppy Joe’s at 10pm. This was Maddicus Markus, live from Tallahassee for CNN ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/67 "2000-11-27T22:03:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by handy \* > \*\*As the retort said, “You guys (england) couldn’t effectively quash a rebellion in the Falklands” makes me think you are no match for the US. \*\* Well, yes, but I’ll take my chances against a nation that can’t tell the difference between a war and a rebellion, or between victory and defeat… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/68 "2000-11-27T22:32:58Z")
Ahh we should be ok, the UK mainland is a somewhat larger island than Grenada.They’ll more than likely become lost. Imagine, lost and stuck in the wilderness of our motorway services canteens, desparate for food and only having a few hundred Quid to spend. OOOoooohhh!! the pity of it. ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2000, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/69 "2000-11-27T22:51:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by casdave \* > **Imagine, lost and stuck in the wilderness of our motorway services canteens, …** Or, of course, just sitting stationary on the M25. Oh, so many secret weapons :)🙂 but AnnW alone would do. ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2000, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/70 "2000-11-28T00:09:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bagkitty \* > \*\*All I request is that you don’t randomly attack newbies, when I am using the handle I usually have that amount of sel-restraint. So, nice to be addressed by my doppelganger (damn, where is that prescription bottle?) \*\* [Milhouse] “So this is what it’s like when doves cry” [/Milhouse] Sorry, had to get that out of my system.🙂 Don’t worry about me attcking newbies, that’s not my thing. I mean heck, I’m still a newbie here. Thank you for the advice concerning other message boards too. That could solve a lot of problems before they start. And if not, I can do bitchy. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2000, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/71 "2000-11-28T15:06:43Z")
We have already unleashed our secret weapon! You will fall to it as all have fallen before. (Well maybe not the French) It conquered Japan and it will conquer you. Listen to the marching song of your doom. Who’s the leader of the club that’s made for you and me M – I – C – K – E – Y M – O – U – S – E Hey there Hi there Ho there you’re as welcome as can be M – I – C – K – E – Y M – O – U – S – E Yes we will dress the 82nd Airborne in Mickey Mouse costumes and your soldiers or soccer hooligans or your guys in kilts or you mean drunk chicks will not be able to face a child after being mean to Mickey Mouse so they won’t do a thing. Of course what would we do with England once we have it? ---
**Author:** ![Stimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/779978/32.png) [@Stimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stimpy)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2000, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616/72 "2000-11-28T15:25:10Z")
Eddie Izzard… it went something like this… "Transvestite paratroopers! What an insight, we can’t lose, a whole battalion of men in make-up and dresses… “Hey Bill, look at that! What the hell do you make o that, dognammit! I don’t believe THIS… wait, they’ve got guns! Oh shit!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/were-going-to-war-with-britian/42616.md?page=3)