# Westerns with the strangest plots **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 7, 2013, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050 "2013-04-07T01:28:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/21 "2013-04-07T07:49:58Z")
**Balance** , you have stumped me. What the heck is a ‘land drummer’? ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/22 "2013-04-07T09:38:50Z")
> [@Gagundathar](#): > > **Balance** , you have stumped me. What the heck is a ‘land drummer’? “Drummer”, in this context, is an archaic term for a traveling salesman. A land drummer was a guy who went around trying to sell land to people–in this case, the drummer in question was working for the General Land Office, selling parcels of publicly owned land in the Colorado Territory. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/23 "2013-04-07T12:31:29Z")
What was that horror western where the bad guy was a gunfighter who never lost because he was a vampire or some such, but in the end the good guy beat him by cutting a cross onto the nose of his bullet? I seem to recall it was in black and white, but I only remember seeing the last reel, and that was many years ago. ---
**Author:** ![TonySinclair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/24 "2013-04-07T15:02:31Z")
What, no _Cowboys and Aliens_? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/25 "2013-04-07T15:21:40Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > [Greaser’s Palace](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068659/). Just try to beat that one. That’s the one I was going to mention. No stranger Western, ever. PS. Ugly Ol’ Hiney Ho says hello. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/26 "2013-04-07T16:11:39Z")
> [@TonySinclair](#): > > What, no _Cowboys and Aliens_? Perhaps it’s too soon. Although I enjoyed it well enough on HBO’s On Demand. Maybe it’s a bit long, but there’s the Pause button. Lots of real pros in the cast. And it reminded me of Harrison Ford’s first Western role. As a bank robber in 1979’s “odd couple” film–_The Frisco Kid_. Also starring Gene Wilder as a rabbi just off the boat, on his way to San Francisco. Not as deeply weird as some of the others mentioned, but original enough. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2013, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/27 "2013-04-07T16:38:50Z")
The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. ---
**Author:** ![Meurglys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/258eb7/32.png) [@Meurglys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meurglys)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/28 "2013-04-08T12:58:51Z")
**Warrior’s Way** was great, weird fun! A top swordsman flees Japan and settles in a dying little township in the wild west, but he can’t stay hidden forever… But maybe it’s more a martial arts movie. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/29 "2013-04-08T13:10:39Z")
[El Topo](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067866/). It’s not just the western with the strangest plot I’ve seen, it’s the strangest movie I’ve seen, period. I’m not sure it’s a western, in fact. I’m not sure what it is at all. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/30 "2013-04-08T13:18:41Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > [El Topo](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067866/). . I see it has already been mentioned three times. I thought I was about the only person in the world who had watched it. Dopers are a weird bunch. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/31 "2013-04-08T14:19:25Z")
**Red Sun** – Charles Bronson as a gunslinger and Toshiro Mifune (!) as a samurai collaborating to “rescue” a _katana_ that has been stolen. A very weird flick. **The Outrage** – many of Akira Kurasawa’s Samurai epics (mainly starring Mifune) got turned into westerns, but this is the weirdest – it’s _Rashomon_ transferred to the American West. Even more interesting is the cast – a young William Shatner, Edqward G. Robinson, Howard da Silva (Ben Franklin!), Claire Bloom, and a blue-eyed anglo Paul Newman as a Mexican bandit in the Toshiro Mifune part. **Comin’ at Ya!** – Part of the 3D revival in the early 1980s, this film is really nothing but an excuse to throw things “out of the screen” as you, including pots, water, arrows, and a baby’s bottom. There’s sorta kinda plo about bandits stealing young brides, but it’s just an excuse for things to get thrown out of the screen. **Billy the Kid Vs. Dracula** and **Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter**. The titles say it all, except that the first one gives us John Carradine as Dracula, a role he played infinite tmes on stage, and in the later Universal Horror Films of the 1940s. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/32 "2013-04-08T14:44:38Z")
_Silent Tongue_ ---
**Author:** ![Renifer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71c47a/32.png) [@Renifer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renifer)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/33 "2013-04-08T15:01:35Z")
The Last Days of Horse-Shy Halloran by Bill Pronzini The title antagonist, Horse-Shy Halloran, is so named because he’s afraid of horses. Excerpt: After a while the combination of the pain killer and the warm sunshine prodded him into a doze. He dreamed of giant horses with fangs instead of teeth and long, serpentlike forked tongues chasing him down the road. “We’ll get you yet, Henry Halloran!” they were screaming. “One day we’ll trample you, and then we’ll devour your soul!” He awoke trembling and drenched in sweat. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/34 "2013-04-08T15:04:19Z")
[The Bull of the West](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0066869/reviews): [Plot](http://www.mtv.com/movies/movie/99727/moviemain.jhtml) Hey, an early Charlie Bronson western, gotta be worth checking out, right? This may be the most bizarre, horrible ‘movie’ I’ve ever seen. It’s just two episodes of the Virginian stitched together with Bronson, James Drury, Doug McClure, Brian Kieth, George Kennedy, etc. But the episodes have nothing to do with each other, thus making the scenes and dialogue beyond bizarre. It was released internationally as a full length western. I tried to watch it unaware of any of this and was soon thinking… WTF??? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/35 "2013-04-08T15:27:34Z")
Not the strangest or weirdest plot, but still deserving some mention is [The Terror of Tiny Town](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Terror_of_Tiny_Town). ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/36 "2013-04-08T15:30:03Z")
**She Wore a Yellow Ribbon** really had no plot – it was showing the incidents of a cavalry officer as he went on his last patrol before retiring. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/37 "2013-04-08T15:33:52Z")
I really must see El Topo. 😃 Strangest western I’ve actually seen has to be _Dead Man_, mentioned upthread. “Read me from the Good Book, mama!” ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/38 "2013-04-08T16:20:56Z")
Many of mine are already mentioned, but what about [Six-String Samurai?](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six-String_Samurai). I consider it a “western”, although it is post-apocalyptic. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/39 "2013-04-08T16:31:32Z")
Cowboys vs Aliens? I don’t know if it’s technically a “Western”, but the 90s film “Ravenous” is pretty strange. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2013, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050/40 "2013-04-08T18:23:15Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Many of mine are already mentioned, but what about [Six-String Samurai?](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six-String_Samurai). I consider it a “western”, although it is post-apocalyptic. I was gonna mention it, but I figured I’d already used up my allowance of samurai westerns. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/westerns-with-the-strangest-plots/655050.md?page=3)