# Whan that aprill with his shoures rante **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 1, 2014, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072 "2014-04-01T03:52:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/41 "2014-04-01T20:13:28Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I’m starting to hate sites like the Onion, the Daily Currant and The Borowitz Report because I have some very very stupid and very very liberal friends who haven’t an ounce of critical thought in their heads apparently and it’s embarrassing to have a political conversation on facebook when they burst in with some codswallop from a satire site. Right wing morons have talk radio and Fox News. Left wing morons have facebook and upworthy and all those stupid spammy viral bullshit websites. I gave up Facebook for Lent and I think I’m going to give it up for good. I didn’t realize how annoyed and frustrated it made me. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/42 "2014-04-01T20:20:26Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I go even broader. I’m starting to hate sites like the Onion, the Daily Currant and The Borowitz Report because I have some very very stupid and very very liberal friends who haven’t an ounce of critical thought in their heads apparently and it’s embarrassing to have a political conversation on facebook when they burst in with some codswallop from a satire site. We have a very unfunny satirical news radio program here in Canada. Many of my friends, who are normally intelligent people, have been fooled by it. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/43 "2014-04-01T23:11:18Z")
> [@3trew](#): > > I really think I could tolerate this crap (-13 right now) if the meteorologists would just admit that they have no freaking clue beyond about three days and stop telling us it’s going to go back to seasonal norms next week. They have been wrong for at least a month now. [It sounds like you can relate to this video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkDvqQKGgDA) 🙂 ETA: And you too, **Rachel.** ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2014, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/44 "2014-04-01T23:51:16Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > [It sounds like you can relate to this video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkDvqQKGgDA) 🙂 > > ETA: And you too, **Rachel.** That is hilarious! Thank you for sharing this. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/45 "2014-04-02T01:16:53Z")
Hrmph. Watkins no longer makes my laundry detergent. I’ll have to find a new one, which makes me less than happy. Yes, they still make laundry detergent, but it’s for high efficiency machines, and mine is not. ---
**Author:** ![Cheez\_Whia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d26b3c/32.png) [@Cheez\_Whia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheez_Whia)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/46 "2014-04-02T01:51:29Z")
Anti-rant: Hubby is improving! He will not need surgery and is on clear liquids! ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/47 "2014-04-02T03:10:07Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > Hrmph. Watkins no longer makes my laundry detergent. I’ll have to find a new one, which makes me less than happy. Yes, they still make laundry detergent, but it’s for high efficiency machines, and mine is not. I wonder what would happen if you used HE detergent in a regular machine. As far as I can tell the only difference is the HE stuff doesn’t make as much suds, but he suds are not what cleans your clothes, so maybe it would work just fine. Might be worth a try. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/48 "2014-04-02T03:42:25Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > I wonder what would happen if you used HE detergent in a regular machine. As far as I can tell the only difference is the HE stuff doesn’t make as much suds, but he suds are not what cleans your clothes, so maybe it would work just fine. Might be worth a try. I actually asked them about this several years ago, and this was the response from customer service. > [@](#): > > A high efficiency detergent is not suitable for your Fisher and Paykel washing machine model IWL16. A high efficiency detergent is best used with high efficiency machines that use less water. The Intuitive IWL16 is not a high efficiency machine so you can any type of laundry detergent and it does not have to be high efficiency. I took this to mean that it was a bad idea to use HE detergent. Is HE still more expensive than regular detergent? ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/49 "2014-04-02T04:48:00Z")
Effing AT&T - they deserve a whole rant thread of their own but I don’t have the energy. Monday I come home to find our landline is out. I try swapping out a different phone, and a different cable, still nothing. So I call them on my cell. They will be out the next day between 8am-6pm (what, no window at all? Oh well, I can work from home one day I guess). 3pm they’re not here and I’m getting suspicious so I call back. Oh no, the appt is for tomorrow and I don’t see any notes saying it was changed. 48 hours to fix a landline? I indicate I am pissed and I don’t like it and they say they will expedite a call from a manager who will call me within 2 hours. I’m not sure how much good that’s going to do, but clearly the flunky I’m dealing with can’t do anything. 3 hours later and no call. I call again, wondering out loud where my promised call from the manager could be. Lo and behold, I can be transferred immediately to a supervisor. He’s clearly one flunky level above the other one, but he does promise they will come in the morning. At the end of the conversation, he mumbled about how they appreciate having me as a customer. When this phone is fixed I am going to take great pleasure in switching to Vonage and cancelling AT&T for-fucking-ever. Funny side story: back in 1985 I temped for 3 months at the San Francisco office of AT&T. That was just after they had been gutted by Uncle Sam - lost their monopoly on long distance and all the baby Bells. It was kind of funny to watch the panic and stress, since I didn’t have to share it. Weekly addresses from the CEO saying not to worry, we have our strategy in place and we’ll be back on top in no time. Interesting to see how that has played out. Interesting how corporate culture apparently hasn’t changed much in the 30 years since then - they still act like a monopoly. Hell, Comcast gives you a 2-hour window now, don’t they? Fucking Comcast! How does AT&T even expect to compete? ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/50 "2014-04-02T07:34:02Z")
The response seems to be missing an “use”, but I interpret it to mean “well, HE soap is more expensive, so it’s a bit silly to use it with a non-HE machine which can take both HE and cheaper non-HE soaps”. So, you can use it, but there may be cheaper brands that work as well. ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/51 "2014-04-02T08:55:05Z")
It’s the fucking cruelest month. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/52 "2014-04-02T09:31:36Z")
[Moderating] I’ve merged the two mini rant threads. [/Moderating] ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/53 "2014-04-02T15:45:10Z")
Well, I like this title less. It’s okay, I guess, as far as Olde Englishe mini-rant titles go. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/54 "2014-04-02T16:38:48Z")
Years ago, I learned that if you’re born on April Fool’s Day, it’s just better to take the day off. Because, no, that joke isn’t funny. Not that one either. Yes, heard that joke before; it’s not funny. Enough of that and I want to punch people. Ha ha. However, after 12 _years_ of this, I expected someone (maybe?) to realize that _I took the day off_. I got emails expecting urgent replies, panicked phone calls (yes, out of office messages were on). Wouldn’t be so bad, if it wasn’t all about the same process problem I’d been nagging them about all month, which they didn’t want to deal with because the fix was too onerous. They finally fixed it Monday… and panicked when one month’s worth of problems didn’t go away in a few hours. Hence, yesterday’s calls. Today? Everything’s fine. Thank Og **Lightray** is around. People were trying to _hug_\* me. Great. But I’m still thinking: if you’d actually listened to me a month ago, I could have had a _day off_, numbskulls. - I didn’t become an engineer because I like people touching me. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/55 "2014-04-02T16:48:04Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > What? No posts in Middle English yet? Fuck that! Whan in Aprille with its shoures soote The taxmanne comen to taken youre loote . . . ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/56 "2014-04-02T16:49:43Z")
Lood sing “Goddam!” ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/57 "2014-04-02T17:24:50Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Well, I like this title less. It’s okay, I guess, as far as Olde Englishe mini-rant titles go. 🙂 Middle English. You can mostly understand it. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/58 "2014-04-02T17:31:38Z")
I have to go to the DMV to get a new picture taken for my driver’s license. Here in Arizona, your license doesn’t expire until you’re 65, but they still want you to update your picture once a decade or so. I can see why they want a recent picture, and I’m OK with the necessity of it, but dang…I have to go to the DMV. And get my picture taken. But at least I won’t have to step foot into the place again this decade. Actually, I have until June to get it done, but I’m going to suck it up and do it this week. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/59 "2014-04-02T18:40:43Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > I have to go to the DMV to get a new picture taken for my driver’s license. Here in Arizona, your license doesn’t expire until you’re 65, but they still want you to update your picture once a decade or so. I can see why they want a recent picture, and I’m OK with the necessity of it, but dang…I have to go to the DMV. And get my picture taken. But at least I won’t have to step foot into the place again this decade. > > Actually, I have until June to get it done, but I’m going to suck it up and do it this week. Can you get an appointment that soon? Maybe California is a special case, on account of our humongous population, but the fact that you say > [@](#): > > but dang…I have to go to the DMV. suggests that going in without an appointment is madness. I brought my daughter to DMV yesterday (WITH an appointment). The line to CHECK IN for appointments took about fifteen minutes. And it was 1/4 to 1/4 the length of the line for people who had no appointments. All in all, we were in there for about an hour to get her a state ID (she’s about to graduate high school; a school ID isn’t going to cut it any more). ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2014, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072/60 "2014-04-02T18:43:04Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > What? No posts in Middle English yet? Fuck that! Apropos of nothing, [Geoffrey Chaucer hath a blog!](http://houseoffame.blogspot.com/) Doo-dah, doo-dah! > [@](#): > > jeudi, mars 20, 2014 > > \*\*Maken Melodye on Whan That Aprille Day \*\* > > Friendes, > > Yt doth fill my litel herte wyth gret happinesse to invyte yow to a moost blisful and plesinge event. > > On the first daye of Aprille, lat us make tyme to take joye yn alle langages that are yclept ‘old,’ or ‘middel,’ or ‘auncient,’ or ‘archaic,’ or, alas, even ‘dead.’ > > Thys feest shal be callid ‘Whan That Aprille Daye.’ > > Ich do invyte yow to joyne me yn a celebracioun across the entyre globe of the erthe. Yn thys celebracioun we shal reade of oold bokes yn sondrye oold tonges. Eny oold tonge will do, and eny maner of readinge. All are welcome. > > Ye maye, paraventure, wisshe to reade from the beginning of my Tales of Caunterburye, but ye maye also wisshe to reade of eny oothir boke or texte or scroll or manuscript that ye love. Ye maye even reade the poetrye of John Gower yf that ys yower thinge. > _What are sum wayes to celebrate Whan That Aprille Daye?_ > > Gentil frendes, yf yt wolde plese yow to celebrate Whan That Aprille Daye, ye koude… > > • Maken a video of yowerself readinge (or singinge!) and share yt on the grete webbe of the internette. > > • Yf ye tweete, sende tweetes wyth the haschetagge #whanthataprilleday > > • Make sum maner of cake or pastrye wyth oold wordes upon yt, and share yt wyth good folke and share pictures of yower festivitee. > > • Yf ye be bold, ye maye wisshe to share yower readinge yn publique, yn a slam of poesye or a nighte of open mic. > > • Yf ye worke wyth an organisatioun or scole, ye maye wisshe to plan sum maner of event, large or smal, to share writinge yn oold langages. > _What ys the poynte of Whan That Aprille Daye?_ > > Ower mission ys to celebrate al the langages that have come bifor, and alle their joyes and sorrowes and richesse. > > Ower mission ys to remynde folk of the beautye and grete lovelinesse of studyinge the wordes of the past. And eke ower mission ys to bringe to mynde the importaunce of supportinge the scolership and labour that doth bringe thes wordes to us. To remynde folk to support the techinge of paleographye and of archival werke and eek, ywis, the techinge of thes oold langages. To remynde folk of the gret blisse and joye of research libraryes. For wythout al of thes, the past wolde have no wordes for us. > > Ower mission ys also to have ynogh funne to last until next Whan That Aprille Daye. > > Note that thys event doth also coincide wyth Aprille Fooles Daye, the which ys fyne by cause we do love thes langages and alle who love are yn sum maner also fooles. > > Ich do hope wyth al myn herte that that sum of yow good folke will joyne me on thys April first for readinge and celebratinge and foolinge. Lat us maken melodye. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whan-that-aprill-with-his-shoures-rante/685072.md?page=4)