# What are some things you could do with a cucumber? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 11, 2003, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379 "2003-02-11T17:12:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Nightsong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nightsong/32/3083_2.png) [@Nightsong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightsong)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/21 "2003-02-11T23:06:18Z")
Slice them and put 'em in a mayo, sugar, and pepper based sauce. (It’s a nice alternative to the vinegar based sauces: I normally have half the cuke cut up and put into the vinegar sauce, the other half cut up and placed into the mayo based one.) Cut 'em up and place them in a stew or soup. Get some of the props meant for Mr. Potato Head and use them on the cuke. Get three or four smaller ones, and a portabello mushroom and make a veggie table/stool. Use them as play-swords. Use them to play with a cat who’s in a playful mood and save your own skin from gaining unneeded ventilation. * * * \<\< Up your dosage. \>\> ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2003, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/22 "2003-02-11T23:15:18Z")
> [@](#): > > Well duh, you could do the only thing I would even remotely consider doing with one of those nasty things: make tzatziki!!! Amen! I make a mean tzatziki. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/23 "2003-02-12T00:50:06Z")
“Concombre Fatigue!” My mom takes slices of cucumber and soaks them in vinegar with a little salt and pepper. Shake it up really hard, or just leave it long enough for the cucumber to get kind of mushy, and eat. Its good! ---
**Author:** ![MadScientistMatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc8723/32.png) [@MadScientistMatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MadScientistMatt)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/24 "2003-02-12T01:06:57Z")
Well, there is one salad I have a recipe for that calls for thinly sliced cucumber in a lemon juice sauce with sugar and white pepper. Or, you could wrap it in aluminum foil, go to the nearest airport, and re-enact a particular scene from _This Is Spinal Tap._ ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/25 "2003-02-12T01:20:10Z")
If they’re left on the vine too long, they get bloated and turn yellow. And they float. You have a biodegradable pool toy! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/26 "2003-02-12T02:21:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Shagnasty \* > \*\*You could put little fins on it and use it as a toy rocket. \*\* The model rocket engines I’m familiar with would exceed the speed of vegetables and fly through the cuke. ---
**Author:** ![lamafish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@lamafish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lamafish)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/27 "2003-02-12T02:26:39Z")
some people have sex with them. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/28 "2003-02-12T02:28:51Z")
Mention of India and _tzatziki_ in this thread brings to mind a nice Indian side dish, Cucumber Raita. Mix yogurt, finely diced cucumber, and a little ground cumin. Simple and goes great with spicy curries. ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/29 "2003-02-12T02:51:17Z")
\ Cucumbers, cucumbers. Roly poly cucumbers. Cucumbers, cucumbers. Eat them up, yum. Took a cucumber out to see a movie. Didn’t have to pay to get it in. \ ---
**Author:** ![BadBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71c47a/32.png) [@BadBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BadBaby)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/30 "2003-02-12T03:03:29Z")
Cut into chunky sticks, add a little salt, lemon juice and pico de gallo chile (ethnic section). So yummy you’ll lament the many years you’ve wasted sans this treat. Also, they make a reasonable, though slightly juicy, substitute for potatoes when you’re making potato prints. ---
**Author:** ![LordVor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90ced4/32.png) [@LordVor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LordVor)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/31 "2003-02-12T03:15:07Z")
you could put your weed in it, man. -lv ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/32 "2003-02-12T03:16:54Z")
**Aha** , “obvious” meaning either a cucumber salad or a sex toy. Sorry, I guess it wasn’t so obvious. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![flickerwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/13edae/32.png) [@flickerwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flickerwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/33 "2003-02-12T04:30:02Z")
Use it as a one-time weapon… Friend: “What the f\*\*\* ?!??!” You: (running at them) “Haiiii-YAAAAAAH!” _WHACK! SPLUT!_ Cucumber has been utitlized. ---
**Author:** ![flickerwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/13edae/32.png) [@flickerwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flickerwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/34 "2003-02-12T04:32:45Z")
Oop. Utilized, that thar word be. ---
**Author:** ![lamafish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@lamafish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lamafish)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/35 "2003-02-12T05:10:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LordVor \* > \*\*you could put your weed in it, man. > > -lv \*\* 😛 thanks dude ---
**Author:** ![dahempfaerie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/779978/32.png) [@dahempfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dahempfaerie)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/36 "2003-02-12T23:07:53Z")
**Lord Vor** is on the right track, man…cukes and apples make for some tasty pipes…hehehe:D ---
**Author:** ![Niggle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Niggle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Niggle)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/37 "2003-02-13T00:07:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NailBunny \* > \*\*Well duh, you could do the only thing I would even _remotely_ consider doing with one of those nasty things: make tzatziki!!! > > Peel the cucumber and grate about 3/4 of it into a carton of Nancy’s non-fat plain yogurt. Crush about seven cloves of garlic into it, drizzle a little olive oil, and throw in some salt and pepper, and even a bit of dill if you like. Let it sit for at least 1/2 an hour, and then eat it with pita, falafel, gyros, chips, veggies, french fries, whatever you like. It’s the only way I’ll eat cucumber. > > Then, let the last 1/4 of the thing rot in the fridge. \*\* I read this… and went out and bought everything… it’s sitting in the fridge waiting to be eaten. I’ll let you know how it went. 🙂 Thanks! -n ---
**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/38 "2003-02-13T01:00:38Z")
The only real use for a cucumber is as a garnish in a Pimm’s Cup. Mmmmm, [Pimm’s Cup.](http://hotwired.lycos.com/cocktail/99/13/index3a.html) ---
**Author:** ![KeithT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@KeithT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KeithT)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/39 "2003-02-13T04:40:33Z")
Remake of the airport scene in _This is Spinal Tap_ [sub]Though, these days, you’d probably do a little time for your troubles[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/40 "2003-02-13T13:04:37Z")
Cucumber peelings are suppose to keep roaches away. The smell of rotting cucks will keep any living being away. Puree the rest of it, add some yoghurt, and you got a face mask. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379.md?page=3)