# What are some things you could do with a cucumber?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [February 11, 2003, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379 "2003-02-11T17:12:01Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 6\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/41 "2003-02-13T14:08:33Z")

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Deep-fry 'em.

\<snicker\>

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**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/42 "2003-02-13T15:25:12Z")

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“If you want a dildo and you don’t want it to look like a penis, that’s okay, because lesbians make dildos in a variety of shapes and sizes! Don’t we, women? Go down to Good Vibrations and get a - a dildo in the shape of a cucumber! Oh, that’s a good idea; let’s think about this. How much does a dildo cost? Seventy-five, eighty dollars for a good silicone latex dildo? **HOW MUCH DOES A CUCUMBER COST? TEN FUCKIN CENTS!** Go down to the Safeway, get yourself a fuckin cucumber, for Chrissakes! Just don’t, you know, peel it first or it’ll go _thhwip_ right out of your hand.”

- Lea Delaria

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**Author:** ![grettle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@grettle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grettle)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/43 "2003-02-13T16:11:42Z")

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Peel and dice it, toss it into a bowl with cold tortellini, diced tomatoes, italian dressing, choped fresh garlic, and a bit of red onion. An irresistible snack!

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**Author:** ![Adridne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ccd318/32.png) [@Adridne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Adridne)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/44 "2003-02-13T16:56:33Z")

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Make Kapa Maki. Mmm, lovely sushi…

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**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/45 "2003-02-13T17:14:11Z")

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Pickle it.

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**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2003, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-some-things-you-could-do-with-a-cucumber/154379/46 "2003-02-13T17:31:46Z")

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A friend of mine makes a batch or two of Estonian stile sour cucumber each year. Yummy!

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