# What are the bizarre things people say to you when you tell them what you do for a living? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 17, 2012, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735 "2012-08-17T01:38:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![mengvs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f17d59/32.png) [@mengvs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mengvs)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/1 "2012-08-17T01:38:44Z")
I’m a veterinarian. I stopped saying “vet” after three consecutive people responded with, “But you look too young to have served.” The other response I get is, “Boy, you must really like animals, huh?” :smack: A friend of mine is an audiologist. She gets, “What?” a lot, but she says that she has to take it seriously on the off chance someone really didn’t hear her. The last time she laughed, thinking the “What?” was a joke, the person asking was actually hearing-impaired, and got _really_ offended. (And people wonder why your health care provider seems so humourless!) She’s also had a drunk guy in a bar ask if being an audiologist meant she could fix his stereo. She studied linguistics as an undergraduate, and the most common question back then was, “So how many languages do you know?” (“All of them,” was generally her answer.) It’s nice when you can have some fun with your answers. A few of my husband’s patients like to badger him about when we’re going to start having children (we’re not), and in the right context he sometimes shrugs and says, “We can’t, my wife had me spayed.” ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/2 "2012-08-17T01:50:47Z")
“Great, now I guess you have to kill me.” ---
**Author:** ![antonio107](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ea924/32.png) [@antonio107](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antonio107)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/3 "2012-08-17T02:06:44Z")
I was a musicologist. I got “what instrument do you play?” more times than I count, which was annoying, right up there with “what the hell is that?” I suppose I was overly defensive about having to explain my career path, but well, there you have it. ---
**Author:** ![applebetty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4af34b/32.png) [@applebetty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/applebetty)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/4 "2012-08-17T02:23:02Z")
I was a paramedic. The usual first question was “What’s the worst thing you’ve seen?” Like I want to re-live that or even speak of it to a civilian. I usually try to divert with good stories like delivering the New Year’s baby or funny things that happen when the shit goes bad, like loudly farting when bending over when treating someone in church. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/5 "2012-08-17T02:44:27Z")
“Oh, hey, let me ask you something…” followed by a question about, in order of frequency: rashes/eczema, heart conditions, Mom’s medications, bum knees, asthma, urinary tract infections, bowel movements or This Weird Thing I Noticed Last Week. I should carry assessment forms with me. And billing invoices. (nurse) ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/6 "2012-08-17T03:27:14Z")
I’m a web developer. I often get questions about computer problems. Cuz I work with (a) computers. I was hanging out in a suite at a baseball game with a guy who is the Indians ex manager and player, and had paid a lot of money to charity to be there. At one point in the night, the manager dude, who is generally quiet, asked me to troubleshoot his laptop 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/7 "2012-08-17T03:37:29Z")
I work in the renewable energy industry. I also do a fair amount of work with smart grid and sometimes regular old high voltage power distribution. Usually I just say renewable energy though. I told someone that once, evidently on a rainy day, and she replied with “oh but you won’t work today will you, in the rain?” Obviously it’s possible I do installations but I always thought it was really weird of her to assume I do, and couldn’t work in the rain. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/8 "2012-08-17T03:40:40Z")
“Do you beat up prisoners?” I got that one several times. My answer depended on my mood: “Not since they gave me a taser.” “Only if they ask me a stupid question. Like that one.” “I’m the guy in charge so I have other people beat up prisoners for me.” ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Downtown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Mr\_Downtown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Downtown)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/9 "2012-08-17T03:59:39Z")
“I draw maps.” \*“Oh, you’re a cardiologist!” \*“A cartographer, yes.” _“But with Google Maps and GPS, what’s left to make maps of?”_ ---
**Author:** ![Namkcalb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Namkcalb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Namkcalb)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/10 "2012-08-17T04:50:23Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > “Oh, hey, let me ask you something…” followed by a question about, in order of frequency: rashes/eczema, heart conditions, Mom’s medications, bum knees, asthma, urinary tract infections, bowel movements or This Weird Thing I Noticed Last Week. > > I should carry assessment forms with me. And billing invoices. > > (nurse) _Do you beat up prisoners?_ ---
**Author:** ![maggenpye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecc23a/32.png) [@maggenpye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/maggenpye)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/11 "2012-08-17T05:07:00Z")
Yes I get paid - even though I work with volunteers. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/12 "2012-08-17T05:17:32Z")
I’m an industrial electrician at an auto plant. You’d be amazed the number of people who figure that means “You put the wires in the cars.” ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/13 "2012-08-17T06:29:02Z")
Chemical Engineer: “oh so you’re one of those horrible people who put weird genes in stuff!” No, those are Genetic Engineers; they’re Biologists. “But girls can’t be engineers!” “_checks ID_ is 40yo still a girl?” (that’s the last time I got that one) Consultant: “don’t get me fired!” Apparenly the only consultants out there are the kind who prepare mass firings. ---
**Author:** ![markdash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@markdash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markdash)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/14 "2012-08-17T06:55:23Z")
Chemist: “Do you know how to cook meth?” ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/15 "2012-08-17T07:19:49Z")
> [@markdash](#): > > Chemist: “Do you know how to cook meth?” Well? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/16 "2012-08-17T07:28:28Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Chemical Engineer: “oh so you’re one of those horrible people who put weird genes in stuff!” No, those are Genetic Engineers; they’re Biologists. Just tell them, “No, those genes take years to kill people. That’s why I prefer putting poisons in stuff.” ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/17 "2012-08-17T07:56:16Z")
I’m in IT. Yes, maybe I \*could \*fix your computer, but I am trying very hard to have a life outside of work. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/18 "2012-08-17T09:13:10Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Just tell them, “No, those genes take years to kill people. That’s why I prefer putting poisons in stuff.” Poisons? Dude, I spent most of my college years learning how NOT to blow things up. If I was going to start killing anybody it wouldn’t be with no mincy poison! ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/19 "2012-08-17T09:16:03Z")
Okay, I’m a student, but when I say my focus I get some “nice” responses. Here’s the most common: “I do Machine Learning” A. _BLANK STARE_ B. “That sounds boring” (REALLY?) “Y’know, AI?” Then the Robot Uprising jokes start coming in, my “Skynet Development Team” shirt probably doesn’t help :D. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/20 "2012-08-17T09:21:56Z")
Back when writing software was something exotic, I got quite a number of strange questions. “Do you work with those tape things I see on TV?” “Can you really get killed by typing the wrong thing on a keyboard?” “How much do you make and do they pay you in real money?” I now tell people that I am a gardener. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735.md?page=2)