# What are the bizarre things people say to you when you tell them what you do for a living? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 17, 2012, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735 "2012-08-17T01:38:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/61 "2012-08-17T20:12:22Z")
> [@tapu](#): > > I have two ways I can go: > > “I’m a linguist.” > “Do you speak a lot of languages?” > > “I’m an editor.” > “Really? Because I have some poetry right here that I wrote down and…” > (I tell them that I’m a very expensive editor.) > > Every once in a while, to amuse myself, I just say: > “I steal small electronics from Target and resell them on eBay.” Oh yes. The budding novelist who wants me to work for free to read their crappy novel they’ve been working on for the past 12 years. Those people usually have no concept of punctuation, spelling, grammar, or usage. I get that all the time too. “Will you read my novel and give me some feedback?” I answer that one with “Well, what do you do in your day job? Will you do _that_ for me, for _free_? :dubious:” ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/62 "2012-08-17T22:05:48Z")
> [@Sigmagirl](#): > > Among other things, I write book reviews. People tell me how lucky I am to get all those great free books. > > 1. I don’t get free books. That’s unethical. > 2. Many of the books are unreadable crap. I’m surprised at 1. I know a lot of movie reviewers get free press screenings and a lot of video game reviewers get free review copies of games. Not for personal use, obviously, but for review purposes. At least the big companies give such things out, the smaller companies may not be able to afford free screenings/copies. So the comment about free books isn’t that out there since it’s the norm in other review industries. > [@bouv](#): > > Pretty much all I get is 😕 > > Then I say, “I work with medical equipment…testing and repairing it.” > > Them: “Oh, so like…wheelchairs and gurneys and stuff?” > > Me: “No, monitoring equipment, surgical devices, that sort of thing…my specialty is in anesthesia machines.” > > Them: “Oh…” (Indicating they probably still don’t understand, but are afraid to keep asking.) > (I’m a biomedical technician, BTW.) Huh… so that’s the kind of stuff “biomedical engineering” makes, I always assumed from the name that it was the super-class of things like mechanical implants (i.e. hearing aids, pacemakers), prosthetics, etc. Not stuff like heart monitors, anesthesia machines etc. > [@gotpasswords](#): > > Besides, hackers tend to do their attacking from home. Weird, in my computer security professor told us that the best hackers usually aren’t those that exploit security flaws from a terminal behind 7 proxies at home, but rather those that can talk smooth, act natural, and pick locks (and convince the secretary they’re from the Password Inspection Committee of course). Maybe it’s different because of all the cameras and extra security in a bank setting compared to other businesses. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/63 "2012-08-17T22:52:12Z")
My previous job was as an assistant to a disabled lady- for some reason, the commonest response was : ‘Aww, you’re a companion to an old lady? That’s nice.’ Alternatively, people would assume I was a carer for someone with severe learning disabilites, especially the people I know who are carers, who were all utterly confused by the fact that I wasn’t working via an agency, and that I hadn’t been on the same training courses as them (the fact that I didn’t go on any courses, because my boss preferred to train people herself was apparently mind-blowing, and at least one of them stated that ‘shouldn’t be allowed’). I have no idea why the concept of working for someone fairly young, who was physically, but not mentally, disabled, (and real 😉 ) assisting them with things they cannot physically do was alien to so many people. Nor am I sure why anyone working for a perfectly mentally capable adult should be required to learn [Makaton](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Makaton). Very odd. ---
**Author:** ![Grestarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grestarian/32/3227_2.png) [@Grestarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grestarian)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/64 "2012-08-17T22:59:40Z")
When I was starting out in college, I got to school in a sports truck so I was able to dress in slacks and button-down shirts. A lot of my fellow students and even the professors assumed I was a grad student and/or working on courses to augment my business. Casual conversations while walking across campus would go like… “So, what do you do for a living?” “Err…nothing.” “Oh, come on. You gotta do something…” “Well, I’m a student.” “Well, okay, but --” “But that’s not a living. There are _professional students_ but they don’t actually make money at it. And eating ramen every night in a 4-man studio apartment is not what I call living.” * * * Years ago, when I was in another field, conversations would go like… “I’m an editor.” “Really? I’ve got this novel I’ve been working on–” “No, no. That’s Trade stuff.” “Oh.” [obviously they only heard the first word] “Well, my brother’s band is looking to record–” “No, no. That would be sound editing.” [Again, they’ve only heard the first word] “Well, I’ve got this script based on my–” “Naw. That would be film editing. I don’t know anyone in Hollywood.” [I can see the gears churning in their heads; I almost smell the smoke…] “Uhh…” “I’m a developmental editor. I do major reference works in academia.” [I must have said that in a mixture of Aramaic and Klingon because they frown] What? “Specialized dictionaries and encyclopedias --and no, I don’t read every article.” [Actually, I would browse every article, but that’s not the point.] That pretty well kills the conversation. * * * Okay, so having dealt with the comedic miscommunication of my vocation, I would intentionally confuse people with my avocation “So, what do you do in your spare time?” “Well, I beat people up.” “Really? You’re like a collections guy for gangs?” “No, no. Those guys get physical when they don’t get paid. People pay me for what I do.” “Wow! So you’re good at it?” “Well, good enough to get paid.” “That’s cool! How’s that legal?” “Well, I’m a martial arts teacher.” [Light bulbs go on] "Oh! So you teach, like, that Mo Jo Bow? “No, no. I teach Tai Chi.” “Tai Chi? That ballet-in-the-park stuff?” “Well, it’s more like Kung Fu on Quaaludes.” “Really? Like Jackie Chan’s Drunken–” “No, it’s really a martial art that’s practiced very slowly so you can make sure every little movement is perfectly accurate.” “Wow, sounds intense.” “Like anything you do: you get out of it what you put into it.” “Oh, how very Confucian.” “Taoist, actually. Different camps.” “Huh?” “Never mind.” –G! But I can’t explain (Can’t explain) Forgive me one more time, now (Can’t explain) . --Pete Townshend (The Who) . _I Can’t Explain_ ---
**Author:** ![Rollo\_Tomasi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/58956e/32.png) [@Rollo\_Tomasi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rollo_Tomasi)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/65 "2012-08-17T23:02:05Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Oh yes. The budding novelist who wants me to work for free to read their crappy novel they’ve been working on for the past 12 years. Those people usually have no concept of punctuation, spelling, grammar, or usage. I get that all the time too. “Will you read my novel and give me some feedback?” I answer that one with “Well, what do you do in your day job? Will you do _that_ for me, for _free_? :dubious:” Yep, get that all that time. It’s even worse than when they try to pitch their son’s/daughter’s/husband’s/wife’s work, and they clearly don’t have a clue what their family member is writing about. The strangest one ever: Me: I’m a book editor. Doofus: But you don’t live in New York. Er, correct? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/66 "2012-08-17T23:02:44Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Oh yes. The budding novelist who wants me to work for free to read their crappy novel they’ve been working on for the past 12 years. Those people usually have no concept of punctuation, spelling, grammar, or usage. I get that all the time too. “Will you read my novel and give me some feedback?” I answer that one with “Well, what do you do in your day job? Will you do _that_ for me, for _free_? :dubious:” "Y’ know, I wrote a children’s book. I can’t describe it. It’s really not like any other children’s books… " All bad signs. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/67 "2012-08-17T23:04:56Z")
> [@tapu](#): > > "Y’ know, I wrote a children’s book. I can’t describe it. It’s really not like any other children’s books… " > > All bad signs. “It’s called: Pop Goes the Hamster (And Other Fun Microwave Games)” ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/68 "2012-08-17T23:08:31Z")
English professor: “Well, I guess I’d better watch my grammar around _you_.” (Um, no, actually, people who teach writing for a living are very, very unlikely to correct your grammar. For one thing, we generally _understand how language works_ and are aware that it comes in different registers and dialects, none of which is more “correct” than any of the others, and for another, why in HELL would I want to critique someone else’s language when I’m not getting paid for it?) ---
**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/69 "2012-08-17T23:15:46Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > “It’s called: Pop Goes the Hamster (And Other Fun Microwave Games)” That one I may want to take on. ---
**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/70 "2012-08-17T23:17:01Z")
> [@Fretful\_Porpentine](#): > > English professor: “Well, I guess I’d better watch my grammar around _you_.” > > (Um, no, actually, people who teach writing for a living are very, very unlikely to correct your grammar. For one thing, we generally _understand how language works_ and are aware that it comes in different registers and dialects, none of which is more “correct” than any of the others, and for another, why in HELL would I want to critique someone else’s language when I’m not getting paid for it?) Yes, yes, yes. I, a linguist, have gotten this as well. How far off can you get? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2012, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/71 "2012-08-17T23:27:35Z")
> [@tapu](#): > > Yes, yes, yes. I, a linguist, have gotten this as well. How far off can you get? 😃 Well… maybe they’re afraid they have Broca’s Aphasia and nobody told them (y’know, to be polite and stuff) and now you’re going to shatter their delusion that they can form coherent sentences! ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/72 "2012-08-18T00:07:55Z")
> [@Grestarian](#): > > “Tai Chi? That ballet-in-the-park stuff?” > “Well, it’s more like Kung Fu on Quaaludes.” This is my favorite description of Tai Chi ever. ---
**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/73 "2012-08-18T00:22:40Z")
> [@Jragon](#): > > Well… maybe they’re afraid they have Broca’s Aphasia and nobody told them (y’know, to be polite and stuff) and now you’re going to shatter their delusion that they can form coherent sentences! That sounds more like they have Wernicke’s aphasia, but your point is taken. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/74 "2012-08-18T01:18:04Z")
> [@tapu](#): > > That sounds more like they have Wernicke’s aphasia, but your point is taken. 😃 I thought Broca’s characterized inability to speak, whereas Wernicke’s characterized inability to understand. But I’m probably wrong, I get them confused all the time. I defer to your expertise :p. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/75 "2012-08-18T01:45:28Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > A former coworker’s GF had just gotten a settlement for something like $20,000. They made plans to use the money to buy a bar. He thought that that meant that he’d be able to do nothing but sit around and drink all day. He’s right. It’s just that the business won’t last very long. > [@Brynda](#): > > Me: I am a psychologist. > Other person: Are you analyzing me right now? > Me: Yes. Yes, I am. I figure a better answer would be “How does that make you feel?” ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/76 "2012-08-18T01:51:05Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#): > > **Do you drive the armored trucks?** A mainframe in an armored truck? We’d need some lon-n-n-g cables. [In your pocket, on the other hand…](http://www.designspark.com/content/my-raspberry-pi-thinks-its-mainframe) Have you ever used a 3270? Ever written JCL? Do you want to bean me with a 3270 for asking dumb questions yet? ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/77 "2012-08-18T02:12:22Z")
> [@Filbert](#): > > My previous job was as an assistant to a disabled lady- for some reason, the commonest response was : > > ‘Aww, you’re a companion to an old lady? That’s nice.’ > > Alternatively, people would assume I was a carer for someone with severe learning disabilites. Uh, you’re British, right? Learning disabilities means something very different in the US so you’re probably confusing people here, too. Here someone labeled learning disabled is dyslexic or the like, not mentally retarded. I work for a program that provides educational opportunities to doctors and social workers working with those who are both intellectually disabled and mentally ill. I host the online events for their trainings and meetings, mantain the website, edit lecture videos, and design the layout (not content) of online courses. The only odd comment I tend to get is people thinking it’s “brave” to be able to speak to a large group during the online trainings, and how they could _never_ do it. I don’t find it nearly as daunting as they think it is even though I’m an introvert. First, I only do about 1% of the speaking, so it’s not like I’m the center of attention long. And second, although I’m fairly experienced with public speaking, it’s not like I can see the hundred or whatever people listening to me, so it’s pretty easy to pretend the audience isn’t even there. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/78 "2012-08-18T02:21:05Z")
When asked, I tell them I’m an electrical engineer. They say nothing. And move onto a different subject. ---
**Author:** ![Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Springtime_for_Spacers)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/79 "2012-08-18T02:36:34Z")
As an archaeologist people would say “Come and dig my garden”. Whilst working in Holland I had to see a local doctor for a rash. Naturally when I told him where I was working he say “You will have to dig my garden” And naturally he was a little put out by my polite fake laugh before he continued “It is the site of a medieval nunnery.” ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2012, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735/80 "2012-08-18T03:01:32Z")
> [@Brynda](#): > > Me: I am a psychologist. > Other person: Are you analyzing me right now? > Me: Yes. Yes, I am. I’m in my last semester of a master’s in clinical mental health counseling, working full-time as an intern in a community counseling agency. “Oh, I don’t believe in therapy” is probably my personal favorite. “Have you ever had a client really freak out and act crazy?” - I think that’s the mental health professional equivalent of people asking about the worst thing a paramedic has ever seen. I like to say that I’ve had a husband freak out and act really crazy, so after that, I’m not really fazed. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-bizarre-things-people-say-to-you-when-you-tell-them-what-you-do-for-a-living/631735.md?page=5)