# What are the rules for men's stationery? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 17, 2008, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313 "2008-08-17T20:10:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![zweisamkeit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zweisamkeit/32/4360_2.png) [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/21 "2008-08-18T15:21:27Z")
[QUOTE=Zsofia] You don’t send thank-you notes? Or if you stay overnight at somebody’s house you don’t write them a note afterwards? When somebody dies, you write an e-mail? [/QUOTE] Sure I do, but it’s generic “hey, this is nice/pretty” stationery I can pick up. I don’t have my actual _name_ on the stuff. That just seems weird to me. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/22 "2008-08-18T15:42:52Z")
[QUOTE=zweisamkeit] Sure I do, but it’s generic “hey, this is nice/pretty” stationery I can pick up. I don’t have my actual _name_ on the stuff. That just seems weird to me. [/QUOTE] That’s a style choice. You don’t NEED personalized stationary but some people like it. I love having it when I have it. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/23 "2008-08-18T15:50:09Z")
Yeah, it’s just nice and special. Plus, personally I like the “informal notes” (which are pretty formal today) because they limit the space you have to fill up with “thank you” without just being a card, which IMHO isn’t enough. Sure, I could use generic foldover cards, but the ones with my name are special. Plus, then it doesn’t matter if you can’t read my signature. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/24 "2008-08-18T16:06:12Z")
I agree, the size of correspondence cards (informals are even more old fashioned and just a slightly different size) makes them perfect for two sentences - you don’t feel like you need to find something to say to fill the page. I’ve always found purchased Hallmark sort of “thank you” or “Congrats” cards to seem weird to me - that’s why you have stationary, so you don’t need to run out and purchase a card. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/25 "2008-08-18T16:14:40Z")
I just have this hangup - I feel it should fold. I don’t know why. It’s just me, I guess. Even Crane’s thinks men should go with cards instead of foldovers, so okay. But my gut reaction is “You sent me an index card?” ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/26 "2008-08-18T18:10:45Z")
In Crane We Trust, Zsofia. Get 'im some navy-on-cream cards. Black ink always makes me think of funeral cards. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/27 "2008-08-18T18:23:50Z")
Do you know what Crane’s personalized stuff costs? I use their non-personalized half sheets for letters and love it, but I don’t know if I can justify that. (He was so cute at lunch - we were talking about it and he said he’d love to have simple traditional notes with fancy envelope liners, like some of my half sheets have, 'cause it’s like a classic suit with a showy lining.) And he agrees that notes you send people should fold, because you shouldn’t be sending people some stuff you scrawled on an index card with your name on it. 🙂 I’m surprised he’s so sensitive to the whole thing - usually he looks at me like I grew a tail when I try to discuss the finer points of etiquette. He does care very much how he presents himself to clients, though, and he’s really starting to run into a lot of these not-business-but-business-related-but-needs-something-personal situations. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/28 "2008-08-18T19:19:22Z")
I didn’t mean buy Crane stuff (yes, I know what it costs, I used to work in a stationery store!), I meant do what Crane’s Blue Book tells you to do. The cost of engraved Crane stationery is mitigated after the first batch, btw, because they send you your dies. A decade ago, the die cost about $75, but every time you re-ordered you sent it back to them for printing and the subsequent batches therefore cost much less. Not that there’s anything wrong with thermal printing, imho. Nobody knows the difference these days anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/29 "2008-08-18T19:31:56Z")
Here’s the line of affordable, personalized stationery we sold where I worked: > **[Personalized Stationery, Napkins & Gifts | EmbossedGraphics.com](https://www.embossedgraphics.com/)** > > Embossed Graphics offers affordable, personalized stationery, fine wedding invitations, papers, notepads, and napkins shipped in 48 hours. Order your custom stationery set today! Crane’s offerings had the beautiful Florentine envelope liners available (and I’m still working through boxes of blank stationery with them), and they carry the weight of tradition, but generally I thought that for high-end stationery William Arthur had some lovelier designs. It was also moderately more affordable, but still expensive. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/30 "2008-08-18T19:43:50Z")
[QUOTE=zweisamkeit] Man, I’m a Midwestern po’ ass, judging from this thread. I had no idea people get stationery with their name on it as a matter of course these days. [/QUOTE] The only person I knew who did was upper class from Altanta. I do have ready-made cards with my last initial on the front, but they are from KMart. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/31 "2008-08-18T19:54:17Z")
I had to look up what ‘ecru’ was. I guess I’m a long way from the upper class… ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/32 "2008-08-18T20:03:47Z")
My mom had stationery with her name on it when I was a small child. I remember being totally fascinated with it, and wanting my own personalized paper, badly. Now that I am an adult, I can’t justify the cost. I love stationery, though, I have several boxes of it at any moment. Some of it’s just fun, like my Batman stationery, though. I just got [this monkey stationery from Crane’s](http://www.crane.com/prdSell.aspx?Name=CF1829_PaperCollageMonkeyNoteCards) recently. Monkey cards! Love it. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/33 "2008-08-18T20:05:17Z")
The American Stationery Co. of Peru, Indiana has some nice, reasonably-priced stuff for both guys and gals. I have 8 1/2x11 white cotton bond stationery with my name and address printed in dark blue ink at the top, which I use for most of my personal correspondence of any length that doesn’t go via email. I have some foldover cards, also white with my name in blue. (I’ve had some in the past with dark green or dark red ink, back in my wild ‘n’ crazy past). I’m a more formal guy than most of my peers, and I like to use these for thanks-yous, congratulations, thinking-of-yous, etc. There’s still a time and a place for good paper, even in this much-less-formal age. A joke for the OP: Q: Why don’t Southern belles like orgies? A: Too many thank-you notes. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/34 "2008-08-18T20:29:02Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] (I’ve had some in the past with dark green or dark red ink, back in my wild ‘n’ crazy past). [/QUOTE] Whoa! I bet like old girlfriends and youthful recreations drug use you now wonder what in the world you were thinking! (I like correspondence cards in part because they are masculine - since I use them mostly for personal contact in business relationships, I don’t want anything that can be mistaken for girly affectation. Most people have never seen one before though.) ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/35 "2008-08-18T22:05:15Z")
My sister’s kids are well into their twenties now and have never been able to write thank you notes. One year we sent them what we thought were total slap-in-the-face Christmas presents: boxes of personalized stationery. To us, it was an obvious “send us thank-you notes this time, or its Target gift cards from now on.” They get Target gift cards now. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/36 "2008-08-18T22:11:02Z")
[QUOTE=Sattua] I didn’t mean buy Crane stuff (yes, I know what it costs, I used to work in a stationery store!), I meant do what Crane’s Blue Book tells you to do. The cost of engraved Crane stationery is mitigated after the first batch, btw, because they send you your dies. A decade ago, the die cost about $75, but every time you re-ordered you sent it back to them for printing and the subsequent batches therefore cost much less. Not that there’s anything wrong with thermal printing, imho. Nobody knows the difference these days anyway. [/QUOTE] swathmore paper also offers personalized watermarks. it is quite pricy, and nearly as permanant as a tatoo. your house paper will have quite the statement though. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2008, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/37 "2008-08-18T22:23:11Z")
Um. Stationery? Why would I need some? ---
**Author:** ![Labrador\_Deceiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@Labrador\_Deceiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labrador_Deceiver)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/38 "2008-08-19T01:02:12Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] Um. Stationery? Why would I need some? [/QUOTE] It has been explained multiple times in this thread, I believe. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/39 "2008-08-19T01:52:59Z")
Eh, no use bothering. I’ll tell you, though, that I’ll always remember the people who thought to send a card when my grandfather died, and hold close to my heart the ones who cared enough to send a personal handwritten note. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313/40 "2008-08-19T02:14:15Z")
This is a wind-up, right? No-one’s seriously going to think that my lack of personalised stationery actually indicates anything important about me, I assume? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-rules-for-mens-stationery/460313.md?page=3)