# What Are The Sharks So Pissed About?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [August 23, 2001, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709 "2001-08-23T13:10:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Revedge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecae2f/32.png) [@Revedge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revedge)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/21 "2001-08-24T02:46:50Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by CrankyAsAnOldMan \*  
> \*\* we eat prairie dog, and we love tractor pulls. But goddamn it, we **don’t have shark attacks.**  
> \*\*

Yeah, but a pack of Prairie Dogs have been known to strip a human carcass in minutes. 😛

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**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/22 "2001-08-24T04:08:30Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \*  
> \*\*BTW, I read somewhere that sharks have a bundle of nerves in their snouts and that hitting them in the snouts is similar to hitting a man in his balls. Any truth to this? \*\*

Nope. The eyes and gills are the most sensitive areas. Pounding on a shark’s snout will likely just piss it off.

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**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/23 "2001-08-24T04:28:45Z")

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Thanks **Finch**. Now I know not to scratch that off my list of “Things to Try if Given the Chance”

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**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/24 "2001-08-24T04:30:10Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \*  
> \*\*Thanks **Finch**. Now I know not to scratch that off my list of “Things to Try if Given the Chance” \*\*

Damn. I was origianlly going to say “Now I know not to do that.” The sentence _should_ read:

Now I know to scratch that off my list of “Things to Try if Given the Chance.”

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**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/25 "2001-08-24T04:53:20Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \*  
> **When were you rin the St Louis area?**

I go through greater St. Louis about three or four times every two months. Mrs. Rastahomie’s family lives in the woods in Missouri and we have to drive through StL to get there. And StL is a nice day-trip for people from central Illinois, so I go there pretty often.

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**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/26 "2001-08-24T04:56:42Z")

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What? Where’s the brave, courageous Crunchy I remember from the days of yore, when I was a newbie with a post count but this tall |-------------------------|

\<shakes head\>  
You weren’t afraid to welcome new dopers back then, and now you’re crossing off “Hit great white in snout” off your list? I shed a tear for the Frog I used to love.

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/27 "2001-08-24T05:05:39Z")

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wevets wrote:

> [@](#):
>
> White Sharks, which are another of the most common species involved in shark attacks, have been protected in South Africa since 1991, the U.S. since the mid-'90s, and are under consideration for protection in Australia (last I heard).

It is true that many in Australia are pushing for protection for the the Great White, but there are unfortunately a small group of fanatics who love to hunt and kill sharks and who fight every attempt to put them on endangered species lists. The worst offender in this group is a guy called Vic Hislop, known in Australia as the Shark Man. Hislop is a freak who actually believes that sharks are evil creatures. Here is his response to an initiative designed to protect the Great White:

> [@](#):
>
> Prominent Queensland shark hunter Vic Hislop today labelled the New South Wales Government’s decision to declare Great White Sharks a protected species as “disgusting”. Because of concerns about dwindling numbers of white pointers, shark hunters will be banned from catching and killing the sharks in NSW waters.
> 
> “For a government to protect something that can tear your children apart in a matter of seconds … is brainless,” Mr Hislop said when told of the decision today. “I hope that next time a person is taken by a great white shark in NSW that somebody is held responsible for protecting these creatures.”
> 
> Mr Hislop said white pointers and other sharks often attacked baby whales, dugongs and dolphins. “One day, with decisions like this, sharks are all that’s going to be left in the ocean,” he said.

Hislops rant can be found [here](http://members.aol.com/marmamnews/96120301.html)

Also, to see some photos of the carnage that Hislop and his ilk perpetrate in the name of saving humanity, click [here](http://www.angelfire.com/pa/habby/emily31.html)

In a web ad for Hislop’s book, _Shark Man_, the blurb says:

> [@](#):
>
> Don’t be fooled by what you have already been told. Vic Hislop has over 30 years hands-on dedicated experience of understanding the cold truth about the coverups connected to shark attacks. Now you can too by purchasing this truly amazing factual book illustrated with graphic pictures.

and next to a picture of Hislop with a dead Great White, it makes the ultimate appeal:

> [@](#):
>
> It is easy to see how this monster, as with many others, could bite and swallow an adult human being in one action.

For the ad, go [here](http://dkd.net/davies/sharkman.html)

This man, with his aquatic conspiracy theories, is very scary.

Finally, for some amazing pictures of Great Whites leaping from the water (previously unobserved behaviour), go [here](http://www.apexpredators.com/sequences.asp)

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**Author:** ![Wildest\_Bill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Wildest\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wildest_Bill)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/28 "2001-08-24T19:44:42Z")

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I say kill all sharks species that have ever attacked a human. We have the technology we can do it. I mean I don’t miss dinasaurs so I sure as heck arn’t going to miss some creatures that I never see in the water or care to see in the water.

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**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/29 "2001-08-24T20:04:56Z")

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Yeah!  
And lets kill all crocodiles too, they have big teeth.  
And let’s get rid of all the mosquitos too, I hate those fuckers.  
And get rid of the beavers, fucking gnawing down all those trees.  
And while we’re at it, I’ve never seen a three toed tree sloth in the wild, and you know what? I haven’t really missed it. Lets get rid of those wastes of oxygen too.  
In fact, lets just reinvent the entire ecosystem until the only thing left is humans and cows. What else do we really need?  
:rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![Wildest\_Bill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Wildest\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wildest_Bill)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/30 "2001-08-24T20:13:39Z")

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You know jack you made sense until you got to beavers. I like beavers. 😃

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/31 "2001-08-24T20:31:56Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> **Wildest Bill wrote:**  
> I say kill all sharks species that have ever attacked a human. We have the technology we can do it. I mean I don’t miss dinasaurs so I sure as heck arn’t going to miss some creatures that _I never see in the water_ or care to see in the water.

Italics added by me. Like you, **Wildest Bill** , 99.9% of people who swim in the water never see a shark. And as the statistics found on various websites already posted on this thread demonstrate, sharks have had a minimal impact on human beings over the past centuries.

As we have already established, there have been only 706 shark attacks in the US (excluding Hawaii) since the year 1670, and only about 7% (or 1 in every 14) of those has been fatal. Compare this to the statistics for animal attacks in New York City in 1987 alone:

1. Dog bites human: 8,064
2. Human bites human: 1,587
3. Cat bites human: 802
4. Wild rat bites human: 291
5. Squirrel bites human: 95
6. Racoon bites human: 11
7. Ferret bites human: 7
8. Skunk bites human: 3

Statistics can be found [here](http://www.flmnh.ufl.edu/fish/Sharks/attacks/relariskcity.htm).

In that same year, there were 13 shark injuries in the US. Maybe if we get rid of all the species on the list above too, especially that evil number 2, we’ll have less to worry about.

The idea of wanting to destroy something that you admit to never even seeing, and which has such a minimal impact on people and such an important role to play in the ocean’s food chain, is pathological. Or just plain stupid.

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**Author:** ![Wildest\_Bill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Wildest\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wildest_Bill)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/32 "2001-08-24T20:37:06Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by mhendo \*  
> Compare this to the statistics for animal attacks in New York City in 1987 alone:
> 
> 1. Dog bites human: 8,064
> 2. Human bites human: 1,587
> 3. Cat bites human: 802
> 4. Wild rat bites human: 291
> 5. Squirrel bites human: 95
> 6. Racoon bites human: 11
> 7. Ferret bites human: 7
> 8. Skunk bites human: 3

Maybe we should just get rid of New York City?

> [@](#):
>
> The idea of wanting to destroy something that you admit to never even seeing, and which has such a minimal impact on people and such an important role to play in the ocean’s food chain, is pathological. Or just plain stupid. \*\*

Why? I don’t like them. I think they are evil looking and I think we would have more fish to eat without them and we could swim in the ocean with no fear.

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**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/33 "2001-08-24T20:59:49Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wildest Bill \*  
> \*\*I say kill all sharks species that have ever attacked a human. We have the technology we can do it. I mean I don’t miss dinasaurs so I sure as heck arn’t going to miss some creatures that I never see in the water or care to see in the water. \*\*

I say we kill all the humans. After all, they kill _far_ more humans than any other animal does. Nuke 'em from orbit - it’s the only way to be sure.

I know I sure wouldn’t miss them…

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**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/34 "2001-08-24T20:59:54Z")

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I vote we get rid of cabbage. I think it looks dumb and feels like rubber. Without it more people would eat lettuce, and I wouldn’t be endlessly confronted with mounds of cole-slaw at barbecues.

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**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/35 "2001-08-24T21:02:04Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wildest Bill \*  
> Why? I don’t like them. I think they are evil looking and I think we would have more fish to eat without them and we could swim in the ocean with no fear.

I don’t know if I should preface this with an apology. If you think there should be one, feel free to insert all the contrite text you need.

Well, **Wildest Bill** , I don’t like you. I think you’re evil looking, and I think we’d have more food to eat without you, and I could go to Texas without fear.

I’d go to the effort of creating a pit thread, linking to some of your choicest quotes, but that’s too much effort. I could explain concepts of the ecosystem, but it’d be wasted effort. Plus, as I said above, I’m of mixed feelings on this. I’ll just keep everything in this post, and move on.  
[sub]ahem[/sub]

You’ve seemed pretty stupid lately, and I don’t know if it’s an act or if you really are this dense. If it’s the former, congratulations on your fine skills. If it’s the latter, then I’m saddened at the quality of education you received. (You DID go to school, right?)

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**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/36 "2001-08-24T21:02:17Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wildest Bill \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by mhendo \*  
> > Compare this to the statistics for animal attacks in New York City in 1987 alone:
> > 
> > 1. Dog bites human: 8,064
> > 2. Human bites human: 1,587
> > 3. Cat bites human: 802
> > 4. Wild rat bites human: 291
> > 5. Squirrel bites human: 95
> > 6. Racoon bites human: 11
> > 7. Ferret bites human: 7
> > 8. Skunk bites human: 3
> 
> Maybe we should just get rid of New York City?  
> \*\*

::::snort:::: Well, when he’s got a point, he’s got a point! Thanks for the laugh, Bill!

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**Author:** ![Wildest\_Bill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Wildest\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wildest_Bill)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/37 "2001-08-24T21:07:05Z")

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Jack,

Obviously you have never tried my cole slaw it is GOOD stuff. You must be talking about the sweet nasty tasting coleslaw.

Tell ya finch,

What you rather be dropped into a tank with a bunch of hammerheads and great whites or a crowd of people?

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/38 "2001-08-24T21:07:49Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> **Wildest Bill wrote:**  
> Maybe we should just get rid of New York City?

But Bill, if we did that then you and your friends would have no liberal feminist Jewish media conspiracy to complain about!

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**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/39 "2001-08-24T22:01:18Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wildest Bill \*  
> \*\*Tell ya finch,
> 
> What you rather be dropped into a tank with a bunch of hammerheads and great whites or a crowd of people? \*\*

I’d gladly take my chances with the sharks, thank you. They’re far less bloodthirsty.

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**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2001, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-the-sharks-so-pissed-about/77709/40 "2001-08-24T22:12:27Z")

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Chalk me up for the sharks, too. In fact, I’m seriously thinking about going on a trip to the Texas Flower Banks this winter to dive with the hammerheads when they do their annual congregation out there. Dozens and dozens of juvenile hammerheads, all schooling around in circles. I’ve seen pictures, and it’s a hell of a sight.

And before Bill writes his congressman (god, I hope it’s Lloyd Doggett) or shows up with spearguns and dynamite, I’d just like him to know that it’s about 150 miles from the nearest land, it’s a National Marine Sanctuary, and they don’t have the slightest interest in hurting any of the dozens of unprotected divers who go to see them.

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