# What are you, a god damn Jehova's Witness? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 15, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551 "2006-10-15T18:27:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2006, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/21 "2006-10-16T20:51:38Z")
I’m sure that somewhere there’s an Electro-Lux salesman cursing his luck that **Happy Wanderer** wasn’t home. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2006, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/22 "2006-10-16T21:49:55Z")
[QUOTE=Happy Wanderer] **Jehovah** [/QUOTE] _/Throws rock at Happy Wanderer._ ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/23 "2006-10-17T10:47:23Z")
[QUOTE=Happy Wanderer] It’s like everybody thinks “well this applies to everyone else, but we are such good friends surely it doesn’t apply to us”. That is why I don’t think a sign would help. Everyone is too important for things to apply to them. [/QUOTE] I hate this attitude. _Surely_ you don’t mean me, too? I once asked all of my friends not to telephone me after 9:30 pm. I asked all of them, even though there was actually only one offender in the group. Sure enough, she was the only one who continued to call me later than 9:30. She would even call at 9:40 and say, “I’m calling \*around \*9:30.” Well, no, my voicemail gives me the time that you called, and it clearly is after 9:30. We are not friends anymore. It wasn’t specifically the late calls that did it, but that is indicative of her selfishness, and that \*\*\*was \*\*\*what did it. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/24 "2006-10-17T11:34:05Z")
I find that chasing 'em off the property while screaming like a maniac and waving a broadsword works wonders. ---
**Author:** ![Carl\_Corey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Carl\_Corey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carl_Corey)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/25 "2006-10-17T12:52:38Z")
> [@Master Wang-Ka](#): > > I find that chasing 'em off the property while screaming like a maniac and waving a broadsword works wonders. You forgot while clad in your skivvies. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/26 "2006-10-17T13:31:05Z")
I think this is common–even among normally reasonable people–who have never worked a really bad shift. I used to get this all the time, even from friends, back when I was working nights. They just don’t get how important getting more than 2 hours of sleep at a time is. It’s daytime, you **have** to be up and about.\ Then they’d get all hurt and teary-eyed when I’d emerge from my bedroom like an angry god of thunder (with terrible bedhead, of course), break up their loud party and tell them, very seriously and staring each of them directly in the eye, that I wish they’d all get worms and fucking die. And meant it. ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/27 "2006-10-17T13:43:00Z")
[QUOTE=Master Wang-Ka] I find that chasing 'em off the property while screaming like a maniac and waving a broadsword works wonders. [/QUOTE] I was hoping someone would link to that little masterpiece. ---
**Author:** ![tashabot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tashabot/32/6250_2.png) [@tashabot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tashabot)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/28 "2006-10-18T07:18:08Z")
[QUOTE=Hung Mung] I was hoping someone would link to that little masterpiece. [/QUOTE] Me too - when my PC crashed I lost my link, and man was that a good story to give people an introduction to the SMDB with. ~Tasha ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/29 "2006-10-18T21:46:47Z")
[QUOTE=Hung Mung] I was hoping someone would link to that little masterpiece. [/QUOTE] Post #31 is **Master Wang-Ka** ’s contribution to [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=242716&highlight=Jehovah%27s+Witnesses+broadsword). ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/edb3f5/32.png) [@Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Push_Up_Bra)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/30 "2006-10-19T02:57:25Z")
I had an interesting moment, just on the topic of unexpected visitors. It was the boyfriend’s 18th birthday and I told him to come over to my place after work. When he rang the buzzer for my building, I also heard a knock on the apartment door. Slightly surreal, I let him in with the buzzer and opened the door. Lo and behold, THE CENSUS LADY! After her automatic spiel and my acceptance to do the damn thing online, she finally registered what I was wearing - navy blue dressing gown with white spots, fishnet stockings and heels… At this point my boyfriend is standing behind her. I let him in and the Census lady’s jaw dropped. Then she picked it up and dragged it to my neighbour’s door. Totally killed the mood I was going for. And I still think now, what would have happened if I hadn’t put the dressing gown on? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/edb3f5/32.png) [@Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Push_Up_Bra)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551/31 "2006-10-19T03:00:14Z")
I swear I didn’t intend for that to be so…spaced… Should have previewed… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-you-a-god-damn-jehovas-witness/376551.md?page=1)