Ummmm…let me think, I guess the two things I’ve done that justify my existance are to be a great uncle, and to be a good friend. Other then that my time on this planet doesn’t amount to a hill of beans.
Keith
I can fix pretty much anything in and around the house.
I’m a great cook.
I’m reliable.
I give great back rubs.
I’m a great listener.
And ladies…i’m still single.
- I can make a darn good dessert.
- Need some choreography now? Give me a call.
- Um… hi, opal?
[Sarcastic answer]
3 days, or 5 if refridgerated
[Honest answer]
I’d probably make a good coaster or paper-weight.
I also take up space that would otherwise be lonely and unoccupied, while at the same time breathing air that would otherwise be wasted.
In other words, not a whole heck of a lot.
Well, this can either be a thread to get depressed in, or a thread to toot your own horn. I don’t feel like getting depressed so…
Professionally:
My job is to make other people’s jobs easier. I develop computer applications for the sole purpose of making mundane, repedative tasks that people are required to do easier and more efficient.
Personally:
I volunteer at a family violence shelter’s computer lab and teach people with little or no computer skills how to use a computer as well as how to use the internet to find jobs, housing and friends.
I donate blood (good call Racerx)
Romantically: I give good back rubs.
I’ve been told I’m an excellent kisser, I’e been told I cause my partner to get all “tingly” and apparently caused more than one partner to feel something akin to a really pleasent dizzy sensation. (being seperated isn’t all bad)
I’ve been told other good things, but that’s more than I ought to get into without being asked specifically;)
struggling MUST…NOT…MAKE…CRUDE…COMMENT!!!
< snort >
I knew that’d getta rise outa ya!
I keep my friends entertained.
I keep the computers running around here, which helps people who help save lives.
I’ve taught a lot of people how to juggle.
I’m kind. Mostly.
I’ve saved the lives of two of my siblings (one twice, in fact).
I’m decently good at making people feel not entirely lousy about themselves.
I can spell “Ohio”. I’ve been able to do it since I was a kid.
If any of my friends ever need help spelling “Ohio”, they know that they can call me any time and I will help them out.
Let’s see. Hummm… because I can
fix complex things
break simple things
support 2 kids as a single, divorced dad
make my kids laugh like crazy at me and with me
be physically brave to the point of stupidity
move huge objects all by myself
help solve other peoples problems but not my own
be sympathetic without being stupid
sell industrial real estate like nobody’s business
talk to anybody about anything
be capable of astounding acts of dumbassedness so profound the Gods fall silent in wonder and hushed awe
dance like Patrick Swazye
be unflinchingly realistic about my personal limitations
still want X-Men style destructo beams to come from my eyes on command even though I a 42 year old professional and should have let this go by now.
That’s about all I’m good for right now
How YOU doin’?
I can dance like John Cameron Swazye … Oh, never mind.
I wrote a poem once. It was published.
If anyone goes through old tomes, they may actually like it.
Other than that, I can’t think of much.
I am eye candy. Though I guess that’s subject to opinion.
Destroying U.S. currency.
specifically… pennies
I bend 'em.
No, I can’t fold them in half, but I can give one a pretty severe bend, so that one would either keep it as a souvenir of the act, or toss it as useless.