Jackknifed Juggernaut neatly folds underwear and places them delicately into hamper on top of neatly folded pants, shirt, and socks. After a thorough flossing of the teeth, JJ dons rubber gloves, claps light off, and the fun begins…
I’m Canadian. And I am not thrilled to my bones by hockey.
I drive a Cadillac. I work for IBM. I look pretty straight-and-narrow.
I have a “Goth Mafia” sticker on my car. I’m likely to be driving down the road blasting Slipknot or Fields of the Nephilim. I’m a very good cook (a food snob, pretty much) who loves Taco Bell, too.
GASP! Blasphemer!!!:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
I’m a big ole Chelsea fag who:
doesn’t like, and knows little about, theatre (with a couple of oddball exceptions)
hates circuit parties
never watches E!
thinks Barbra is the most overrated talent in the last 35 years (she hasn’t been good since the first half of Funny Girl)
reads books on engineering
often has to be reminded to get my hair cut
will wear the same trousers three days in a row
New Caddy or Classic? Because that makes all the difference.
I grew up in Hawaii. But I hate the sun. And the heat. And I’ve also developed a somewhat irrational fear of the ocean (and any other large body of water in which I cannot touch bottom). There are things in there, horrible things with teeth and spines and poison.
That’s the one that got me.
Surely there’s a law…! 
So where do you live now…? Kansas…?
Heart be stilled, Oxy!
Well, let’s see…
I’d probably look like your stereotypical frat-boy, if I wore Abercrombie and Fitch clothes. But I’m not.
I love punk, metal, and gothic music. I’ve been thinking about getting into death metal recently.
I’m a math major, and I really enjoy it. I also study computer science, but I don’t own a cellphone, pager, or PDA, nor do I plan on getting any of these things. Despite studying these things, I also lift pretty intensely (not that someone with my interests couldn’t, but there are very few who do).
Some might consider me a macho slob, but I enjoy wine and classical music.
There are probably others, but I can’t think of them now.
What else would you put PB&J on?
If it makes you feel any better, the new Canadian five-dollar note has hockey on the back. Finally they’re getting rid of the *&^$% birds…
And of course I hit submit instead of preview. sigh
Oh my. Is that a proposition? Does Leif know you’re pandering on the internet? Was that you who tried to feel me up with a butter knife just now?
But, see, KNOWING you means I cannot fathom you listening to anything BUT the Allman Brothers. You also forgot to mention that you want to have Gregg Allman’s baby…
As far as my own incongruencies go, off the top of my head
- I’ve shocked guys with my intimate knowledge and love of football. Once, while listing off the reasons why I didn’t think the Steelers had a chance to beat the Pats, which included mentions of guys on the injured list, coaching styles and the various abilities of each quarterback, the guy I was talking to looked at my husband and said “If you ever leave this woman, she is mine!”.
…and you forgot to mention that you are not only female, but blonde.
And where the hell have you been???:mad:
My tastes in everything are so eclectic, people have a hard time pinning me down, and I wonder why they try. I am often described as “eccentric” or “weird,” by relatives or acqaintances. I can’t tell you how many times people have said, "You don’t act/seem like a (fill in the blank: black, woman, black woman, person my age, city dweller, writer – though I am all those things).
Ours is a world of stereotypes. I think that the idea of something or someone just being, simply because it is, scares people a little. The upshot of it is, once others decide that you are indeed strange, you are pretty much free to do and be whatever you please without worrying about shocking anyone – that is, if you care at all what others think in the first place.
Just a thought. 
And a very good thought it is. Being “ecclectic” is so much more fun, especially if all you have to do to achieve this status is put the word out that you’re looking to marry Greg Allman.
And BTW, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told that I don’t seem like a Black person/Black woman. What do they want, for us all to be Star Jones??? :rolleyes:
Welcome aboard, brainychick. You WILL be at the Fest next weekend? (Not for ME, you know. It’s just that I saw where you are at and thought you might fit in well with the crowd.)
I pay so little attention to other people that I have no idea what about me they may find incongruous. However, at my first Fest silent bob remarked that he was surprised to find that I was a guy. :rolleyes:
Would it be possible for NONE of you to be Star Jones? Not even Star Jones, herself? I’d really appreciate it.