# What are your pet nicknames for various products/businesses? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 27, 2008, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935 "2008-03-27T17:02:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![I\_Have\_Hippos\_In\_My\_Garden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4491bb/32.png) [@I\_Have\_Hippos\_In\_My\_Garden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Have_Hippos_In_My_Garden)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2008, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/81 "2008-04-01T18:57:27Z")
I think this must be an american thing because ive never even heard of it happening here in the uk… ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2008, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/82 "2008-04-01T22:17:00Z")
[QUOTE=ANeverEndingRose] I think this must be an american thing because ive never even heard of it happening here in the uk… [/QUOTE] You’ve never heard it called “Marks & Sparks”? There have got to be others in the UK as well. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2008, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/83 "2008-04-01T22:34:34Z")
Barnes & Noble -\> Bones & Narble USAirways -\> UselessAsswipes BP -\> Bee Pee or Apiary Urinary Extended Stay America -\> Expensive Stay America Brooks Brothers -\> Burukusu Buradasu (their name in Japanese) Chock Full o’ Nuts -\> Chock Full o’ Schmutz obsolete nomenclatures: General Foods -\> Generous Fools Netscape Communicator -\> Nutscrape Computerhater ---
**Author:** ![drewbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drewbert/32/15890_2.png) [@drewbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewbert)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2008, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/84 "2008-04-01T23:31:40Z")
Wal Mart -\> Tram Law Applebee’s -\> Crapplebee’s (even though I don’t hate it as much as many here do) Charlotte Observer -\> Charlotte Disturber Not a brand name, but: Parmesan cheese -\> Paramecium cheese **Zeldar** , according to [Deadmalls.com](http://Deadmalls.com), 100 Oaks should probably be called ‘The Mall That Wouldn’t Die’ ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f08c70/32.png) [@Fugazi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2008, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/85 "2008-04-01T23:45:01Z")
Since the USA Today is to a newspaper, what a fast food joint is to a restaurant, I took to calling it the McNewspaper or just McNews. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/86 "2008-04-02T00:02:41Z")
> [@Litoris](#): > > Crack Whore Barrel I am soooooo stealing this one! HAR! Wally\*World KMartha Pubics (Publix Supermarket) Idolatry (Dollar Tree) Big Slut (Big Lots… there was this really tall slutty looking woman who worked there…) The Pig or Hoggly Woggly (Piggly Wiggly Supermarket) IBarf (guess) Awful House (guess) Hurl House (Huddle House) Booger King (BK) Blows (Lowes) ---
**Author:** ![Charger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df788c/32.png) [@Charger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charger)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/87 "2008-04-02T00:09:30Z")
I remember a few more: Hardee’s = Hardly’s Macintosh = Mine-can-crash This works for car models, too. The Ford Mud-Stain The Jean-Claude Grand Am The Cavalier Attitude The Toyota Pretentious ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/88 "2008-04-02T00:18:18Z")
Mad magazine called Sears Roebuck “Scars Rowboat,” but now it’s just “Sneers.” Taco Bell is “Tacobell’s Cannon.” Pizza Hut is “Pete Zut.” Somebody here excoriated those who say “Tar-zhay” from the old brilliant commercial, so now it’s “Togget.” Burger King is “Burr-GURK-ing.” Radio Shack is “Radio Snack.” The SDMB once had a transmission mechanic who said he had put his kids through school on the trannys in “Ford Exploders,” and I haven’t called them anything else since. The Toyota “SillyCar.” I found out that Monahan was my political enemy, so his pizzeria became “Domi-nono’s” Sometimes I _think_ “The Strolling Bones” or “Pig Boppy,” but I respect them too much to say it out loud. Every convenience store is a “Kwik-E-Mart.” My bank, Star Financial, morphed into “Starvin’ National.” ---
**Author:** ![uncle\_squeegee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b5e925/32.png) [@uncle\_squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/uncle_squeegee)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/89 "2008-04-02T01:59:36Z")
[QUOTE=Mama Zappa] Oooh - just remembered: “Tipsy McStaggers”. Stolen from the Simpsons, where it was the name of a chain restaurant. We use it to refer to the step-above-fast-food places such as Ruby Tuesday’s, Chili’s, Applebee’s etc. [/QUOTE] Was in Ireland a few years ago, and saw a bar called “Tipsy Mc Stagger’s.” Sadly we were driving and the camera wasn’t ready. ---
**Author:** ![Satellite\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Satellite\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satellite_Guy)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/90 "2008-04-02T02:48:27Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] Newspapers: Toronto Star = Toronto Scar. Toronto Sun = Toronto Stun. Globe and Mail = Groan and Wail. National Post = Notional Pest. Bancroft Times = Bankrupt Crimes. The freeway known as King’s Highway No. 401, however, has earned the title _Evil Death Highway of Doom_. [/QUOTE] Chronicle Herald = Chronically Horrid S^G ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/91 "2008-04-02T12:58:14Z")
Creative Loathing. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2008, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/92 "2008-04-02T13:37:27Z")
A few more: Dollar General - _Dollar Genital_ USA Today - _McPaper_ I live in a very rural area, so I frequent _Hooterville Hardware_ and _Hooterville General Store_. Red Lobster is known as _Fred Lobster’s_, but that is more in homage to my then 3 y. o. son’s pronunciation that anything else. Because of him we also eat _brefkist_. Our term for these is ‘Bobbyism’. If I could remember them all, they make a thread in their own right. ETA: Kmart - _K-Fart_ ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/93 "2008-04-03T13:49:27Z")
Taco Bell = Taco Hell, but not just any Taco Bell, a specific one. There are about 6 in the general area of the college I went to and each had their own nickname. Target - Tarzhay, but only until Target themselves started using it in their commercials, then it became apocryphal. The local non-7-11 convenience store (can’t remember the real name) - Quik-E-Mart (like Simpsons). Also, any store with a lighted sign, some of it’s letters of whose lights have gone out = whatever the sign spells with those letters missing. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/94 "2008-04-03T13:55:55Z")
also… Best Buy = The Buy More (Chuck). Home Depot = The Workbench (Reaper). Walmart = (whatever they call it in Evil Dead). Quiznos = we wuv deez subs! Barnes & Nobles = Barns n Stables. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/95 "2008-04-03T16:31:13Z")
In the Navy we would to refer to Puget Sound (WA) as Pubic Mound. Come to think of it, we had a lot of slangy names for places – Virginia Beach is always “Vah Beach” (Highway signage spells out the town as VA Beach); Washington DC is always “inside the Belt(way)”; and Alexandria, Egypt was “The Armpit.” ---
**Author:** ![Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tool_of_the_Conspiracy)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/96 "2008-04-03T16:59:31Z")
I always pronounce CompUSA as “com-poo-sa”. Grocery Outlet is “the used food store”. There used to be a local all-night diner called Hall of Fame, which we called Ball of Phlegm. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/97 "2008-04-03T18:04:01Z")
Belk is “BELK, BELK, BELK!!!” It’s such a gutteral-sounding name. We have a Chinese restaurant called Hunan Best, we call it Human Beast. Wachovia is “wa-cho-vi-ah”, most seem to pronounce it as “wa-ko-vi-ah”. Spaghetti and meatballs is “Pasketti and meat bulbs”. Think I got that from Dennis the Menace. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Caractacus\_Pott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@Caractacus\_Pott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caractacus_Pott)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/98 "2008-04-03T18:53:20Z")
Wachovia=Walk all over ya KFC=Kluckin Fuckin Chicken From the archives: NCNB\*=No Cash for No Body or No Cash for No Blacks First Union=First Onion - (North Carolina National Bank, precursor of the current Bank of America) ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/99 "2008-04-03T19:24:57Z")
[QUOTE=Caractacus Pott] KFC=Kluckin Fuckin Chicken [/QUOTE] We also call KFC King Fucker Chicken, after a "Japanese Engrish"ism we saw a long time ago in “Dave Barry Does Japan.” And the Suzuki Hayabusa motorcycle is the “Hihowahya” (always in a thick Noo Yawk accent) ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935/100 "2008-04-03T19:33:39Z")
[QUOTE=Mama Zappa] Oooh - just remembered: “Tipsy McStaggers”. Stolen from the Simpsons, where it was the name of a chain restaurant. We use it to refer to the step-above-fast-food places such as Ruby Tuesday’s, Chili’s, Applebee’s etc. [/QUOTE] But but but… it’s a [local place](http://www.tipsy-mcstaggers.com/). Not a chain. Let’s see, with respect to the OP: There’s Taco Hell. With the full name being Taco Hell-OOO Nurse! Burger Thing Pizza Slut KFR (Kentucky Fried Rat) Smushed Beans for Refried Beans Dreaded Chicken for Breaded Chicken Glop is my family’s normal, everyday name for most baked casseroles. Sliders for cheap hamburgers Grinder Turkey aka Seagull for Cornish Game Hen Ottoman Empire for pressed Turkey Colored Cauliflower for Broccoli Bleached Broccoli is, of course, Cauliflower Vitamin P is Pizza Oh, yeah: It’s Internet Destroyer, people. Not Exploder. And HSBC stands for: Holy Shit! The British are Coming! One more, based on my experiences while I worked there in HS: K-Mart is The Temple to the Great God Murphy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-pet-nicknames-for-various-products-businesses/442935.md?page=6)