# What are your "Unromaticisms"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 8, 2015, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318 "2015-01-08T15:20:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/1 "2015-01-08T15:20:26Z")
**Unromaticisms:** Things that most loving couples like to do that you do not. For me it’s holding hands. I don’t like it. The palms get sweaty, it’s awkward and you always need that hand for something but you can’t because you’re stuck holding hands! Bah!! ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/2 "2015-01-08T15:24:27Z")
I don’t like holding hands either, so I never do it. Mushy lovey-dovey greeting cards are another thing I can do without. ---
**Author:** ![gallows\_fodder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8c91f0/32.png) [@gallows\_fodder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gallows_fodder)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/3 "2015-01-08T15:30:52Z")
Thirding holding hands. It’s also bad when there’s a big height difference – I’m 5’4" and used to be with a guy who is 6’4", and whenever we held hands (not often) I felt like a little girl walking with her dad. Gross. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/4 "2015-01-08T15:45:22Z")
I hate admitting this…but I’m not a big fan of french kissing. It’s gross, and wet, and sloppy. Maybe I’ve just never had a really good kisser, but I hate even watching it in movies. If I do kiss with tongue, it’s small and subtle. I hate kisses wherein it feels like their tongues are halfway down each other’s throats. ---
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/5 "2015-01-08T15:59:11Z")
I never got the blowing in your ear thing. It does nothing for me, just makes me want to scratch my ear. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/6 "2015-01-08T16:01:26Z")
Shopping together. Dear god in heaven, our relationship would be wrecked if we shopped together on a regular basis. The last time we did it was over four years ago. I mean, for anything. Groceries. Clothes. Furniture. Anything. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/7 "2015-01-08T16:12:15Z")
I don’t understand how people can sleep while spooning unless they’re falling-down exhausted or the bed is so small you’ll fall off otherwise. I need my space. Also, couples who actually _want_ to spend every waking moment with each other - I’m deeply in the love with my husband, but at some point, the constant company of anyone becomes an intrusion. I want to be able to schlub on the couch and think my own thoughts without being interrupted. Or watch some horrible chick flick without worrying that someone is going to comment on how stupid it is. I know it’s stupid. That’s partly why I’m watching it. Anyway, I just don’t get why people insist they want to spend every waking moment with their spouse (or their kids for that matter). It may make me a horrible person, but I need my mental space desperately sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/8 "2015-01-08T16:18:11Z")
Caring abut anniversaries; remembering them at all; marking them in any way; knowing how long we’ve been married without thinking about it. It usually goes like this: Him: Hey check it out: we got married yesterday! Me: neat. Or sometimes like this: Me: I just realized our anniversary was last week. Him: LOL. I still like you FYI. Me: woot! You want to drink that champagne my parents gave us three years ago for an anniversary that we forgot about and never drank? Him: I don’t like champagne that much. Me: Me neither… ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/9 "2015-01-08T16:18:21Z")
Christmas gifts - I don’t give them to other adults and I make it know I don’t want them. I think Christmas is for giving kids gifts. Adults exchanging is just weird to me. Drives my SO crazy because she’s a traditionalist. ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/10 "2015-01-08T16:21:25Z")
Flowers. I’ve never understood how this is a romantic gesture. All I can think of is now I have to DO something with them, I have to prevent the cat from eating them, then when they die, I’ll have to clean up after them. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/11 "2015-01-08T16:59:47Z")
PDA. I’m really uncomfortable doing more than holding hands in public. Occasionally a kiss on the cheek. Maybe. If someone in public wants to know how I feel about my husband, all they have to do is see how I’m looking at him. Makeout session not required. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/12 "2015-01-08T17:42:08Z")
Advertising it to the world after a couple dates, when they must post cutesy comments about it on every social media site, must be flagged as “in a relationship with X” on every social media site. I usually wait a few months to save alot of awkward questions of “what happened with X” when we stopped seeing each other a week later. Cards, gifts, and specific required celebrations like anniversaries having to be on that specific day and failure to do so was a huge relationship fail. I have zero problems with PDA as long as it is genuine “I really want to kiss you NOW” as opposed to some kind of territorial display. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/13 "2015-01-08T19:45:30Z")
> [@Hello\_Again](#): > > Caring abut anniversaries; remembering them at all; marking them in any way; knowing how long we’ve been married without thinking about it. You should have seen the surprise on my face when I found out my roommate of 2 years was my wife. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/14 "2015-01-08T19:49:11Z")
[Spooning.](http://theoatmeal.com/comics/cuddling) ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2015, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/15 "2015-01-08T19:57:28Z")
Valentine’s Day. We’re contrarians about mandatory celebrations. We acknowledge it with a card or something, but would rather go out on some day when the restaurants aren’t hawking cheesy “romantic” dinners served by harried waitstaff. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2015, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/16 "2015-01-09T20:31:41Z")
Living together. We met while both living in NYC, and quickly became a couple living together in a small, 1-bedroom SOHO apartment. We discovered that our lifestyles were totally incompatible, and came close to breaking up. Then I had to relocate back here, into my parents’ house, and luckily the house next door was for sale. My partner bought it immediately. Now, my parents are gone, and we saved our relationship by not living together. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2015, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/17 "2015-01-09T20:39:07Z")
> [@Hello\_Again](#): > > Caring abut anniversaries; remembering them at all; marking them in any way; knowing how long we’ve been married without thinking about it. No; this thread is things couples typically _don’t_ do. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2015, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-are-your-unromaticisms/709318/18 "2015-01-09T21:46:12Z")
I don’t dance. Ever. Never have, never will. I made that very clear to her early on. I’m lucky in that my wife truly, genuinely loathes the concept of Valentine’s Day. Makes me love her extra for that.