# What authors handle sex well? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 21, 2009, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618 "2009-10-21T16:06:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/1 "2009-10-21T16:06:26Z")
The John Norman thread about his Gor books made me wonder why it is that so many authors write about sex so badly. It seems most books handle sex in one of two ways, either romancing it up until it’s all stars and rainbows and Twue Wuv and throbbing manhoods, or dragging it down so it’s all obsession and abuse and general unpleasantness with a side order of desperation if you’re lucky. Of course, some authors just avoid the topic entirely. So, who does it well? Who makes you feel like you’re reading about real life and not either a glamorous or sleazy fantasy? ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/2 "2009-10-21T16:11:04Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > The John Norman thread about his Gor books made me wonder why it is that so many authors write about sex so badly. > > It seems most books handle sex in one of two ways, either romancing it up until it’s all stars and rainbows and Twue Wuv and throbbing manhoods, or dragging it down so it’s all obsession and abuse and general unpleasantness with a side order of desperation if you’re lucky. > > Of course, some authors just avoid the topic entirely. > > So, who does it well? Who makes you feel like you’re reading about real life and not either a glamorous or sleazy fantasy? Philip Roth writes about sex a lot. From a woman’s point of view, I find it misogynistic, but from his point of view, I’m sure he’s telling it like it is. Frankly, it’s hard to see how a woman could stand him long enough to fuck him. But my sense is that he got a lot over the years. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/3 "2009-10-21T17:14:35Z")
I’ve never read Roth, but if someone came across to me as misogynistic, I don’t think I’d feel they handled sex realistically. ---
**Author:** ![Nom\_de\_Plume](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/85f322/32.png) [@Nom\_de\_Plume](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nom_de_Plume)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/4 "2009-10-21T17:33:40Z")
I believe the topic has been handled very well and realistically in _Penthouse forum_, though it may be more of a scholarly work than you’re asking about ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/5 "2009-10-21T17:36:09Z")
Anyone except Jean Auel. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/6 "2009-10-21T17:37:08Z")
Not a single one except Judy Blume. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/7 "2009-10-21T17:44:54Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > I’ve never read Roth, but if someone came across to me as misogynistic, I don’t think I’d feel they handled sex realistically. Well, it’s man sex. That’s the only way I can describe it. I’m not sure he’s particularly interested in sex from the woman’s standpoint (hence, his reputation). From a 70-something miso’s point of view, I think he handles it very realistically. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/8 "2009-10-21T17:50:56Z")
Diana Gabaldon. Jamie and Clair have done it rough, slow, sweet, hanging off a window ledge, in the aftermath of her fever in a ship’s cabin…plus, there’s humor. Their first time is the stuff of legends. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/9 "2009-10-21T17:51:58Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Anyone except Jean Auel. She got repetitive pretty damn quick there, didn’t she? Jondalar and Ayla’s first time was very sweet, but yeesh, woman, come up with some other ways they can Pleasure each other. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/10 "2009-10-21T17:56:35Z")
I like Lois McMaster Bujold as well. Some of the stuff is definitely waaaay on the kinky side (don’t read about Mark’s imprisonment if you have a strong imagination and a weak stomach), some would be perfectly normal teenage sex if it wasn’t for the claws, hirsutism and people trying to kill the two characters (Miles, meet Taura… hope you can get it up), some is perfectly normal first-time sex - I love that reminder a set of upset parents get of their first time in one of the most recent books, the Countess sure doesn’t pull punches 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/11 "2009-10-21T17:57:07Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > She got repetitive pretty damn quick there, didn’t she? Jondalar and Ayla’s first time was very sweet, but yeesh, woman, come up with some other ways they can Pleasure each other. Well, she did eventually throw in some bestiality porn. Jacqueline Carey writes a lot of sex, and while it’s very well done, it’s not very run-of-the-mill. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/12 "2009-10-21T19:24:46Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > Diana Gabaldon. Jamie and Clair have done it rough, slow, sweet, hanging off a window ledge, in the aftermath of her fever in a ship’s cabin…plus, there’s humor. Their first time is the stuff of legends. If they’re realistic, then I’m feeling inadequate. Are they ever _not_ having sex? (I’ve only read the first one.) ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/13 "2009-10-21T19:39:25Z")
I had to laugh…in the latest book, Claire was determined to get Jamie alone because it’d been more than a week since…mmhmpmmm. snicker snicker BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Even so, it was a rather imaginative scene. ---
**Author:** ![Mahna\_Mahna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47c2d/32.png) [@Mahna\_Mahna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahna_Mahna)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/14 "2009-10-21T20:29:51Z")
I’m a fan of Jennifer Cruisie. She manages to write scenes that are sexy without being pornographic, and without resorting to euphemisms like throbbing manhoods and womanly blossoms. Plus there’s plenty of humor and mishaps, and not necessarily rainbows and unicorns and multiple orgasms every single time. She’s my favouritest novelist as far as fluffy silly brainless romances go. ---
**Author:** ![SunSandSuffering](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@SunSandSuffering](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunSandSuffering)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/15 "2009-10-21T22:22:01Z")
Charlotte Roche? ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/16 "2009-10-21T22:33:20Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Anyone except Jean Auel. > [@ivylass](#): > > She got repetitive pretty damn quick there, didn’t she? Jondalar and Ayla’s first time was very sweet, but yeesh, woman, come up with some other ways they can Pleasure each other. Well, they did do it “doggie style” at the end of the second book. But other than that, yeah. Years ago I remember someone posting here the Jean Auel sex scene formula. I can’t recall the details now (other than the requirement that the word “nodule” be used), but it struck me as being pretty accurate. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/17 "2009-10-21T22:42:39Z")
Samuel Delany’s novel _Hogg_ describes the sex really well. I mean, it’s really deviant sex, and would disgust most people, but the sheer amount of _description_ is unrivalled by anything I’ve seen before or since. No author describes the sex act with such detail, or intensity. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/18 "2009-10-21T23:04:07Z")
> [@Mahna\_Mahna](#): > > I’m a fan of Jennifer Cruisie. > > She manages to write scenes that are sexy without being pornographic, and without resorting to euphemisms like throbbing manhoods and womanly blossoms. Plus there’s plenty of humor and mishaps, and not necessarily rainbows and unicorns and multiple orgasms every single time. > > She’s my favouritest novelist as far as fluffy silly brainless romances go. My daughter likes some romance novels, and since the books were in the house, I read them. I was surprised. Sure, Cruisie’s books are silly, but they’re a lot of fun, too, and the sex scenes are pretty good. I’ve been trying hard to think of well-written sex scenes, but I can only come up with Horrible Examples instead. I can think of several authors that depict romance or just plain sexual attraction well, but not of specific sex scenes. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/19 "2009-10-21T23:16:39Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > Samuel Delany’s novel _Hogg_ describes the sex really well. I mean, it’s really deviant sex, and would disgust most people, but the sheer amount of _description_ is unrivalled by anything I’ve seen before or since. No author describes the sex act with such detail, or intensity. I will give you a large sum of money if you never ever mention that book again. ---
**Author:** ![mr.jp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/48db29/32.png) [@mr.jp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mr.jp)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2009, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-authors-handle-sex-well/514618/20 "2009-10-21T23:22:03Z")
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