# What can you not find on the internet? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 19, 2012, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121 "2012-09-19T00:12:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/21 "2012-09-19T15:08:02Z")
> [@Icarus](#): > > What can I not find on the internet? A whole lot. > > Really, for those of us old enough to be pre-internet, the internet (the world wide web, actually) at it’s inception held the promise of being the font of all human knowledge. But as it matured - and once they figured out how to monetize with advertisements - it hasn’t lived up to it’s promise by any stretch. How many times have I typed something into google and the first fifty items on the list are ads and aggregated websites? Or sites where you are stumped as to why it was a match (hidden text?) Then there’s paywalls, etc. > > Geez, it’s crap CRAP! With respect: I have to think the problem here is that you have weak Google-Fu. Not that the Internet is crap. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/22 "2012-09-19T15:32:49Z")
> [@Mississippienne](#): > > Smut fanfiction starring Ariel from The Little Mermaid and Charlie the Starkist Tuna mascot. By the simple fact that you said it, this now exists somewhere on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/23 "2012-09-19T15:51:02Z")
Information on how to get laid and get paid WELL. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/24 "2012-09-19T16:07:30Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > Information on how to get laid and get paid WELL. 😉 [Here](http://www.amazon.com/Ron-Jeremy-Hardest-Working-Showbiz/dp/006084082X) you go.Glad I could help… Assuming you are male…🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/25 "2012-09-19T16:10:05Z")
My thing I can’t find is actually something I first saw on the internet. It was a story on World Net Daily about (surprisingly enough) Obama’s Birth Certificate. The story centered on an FBI investigation, I think in the late 60’s or early 70’s. Turned out, due to his moving back to the US, and some other thing his family was doing, there was a need to complete a file on young Barack. One of the missing items… his Birth Certificate. So, in a thoroughly uneventful investigation, they confirmed the existence of his BC, and closed the file. Now, WND played it up as “Authorities questioned his BC decades ago” but it really meant that, way back when he was a complete nobody, his BC was found to be in order. I can’t find the damn thing because there are roughly a jillion articles on Obama’s Birth Certificate, and I can’t manage to wade through them to find the article, if it even still exists anywhere. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/26 "2012-09-19T16:12:56Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > Information on how to get laid and get paid WELL. 😉 > **[How to Videos, Articles & More - Discover the expert in you. | ehow.com](https://www.ehow.com)** > > Learn how to do just about everything at ehow. Find expert advice along with How To videos and articles, including instructions on how to make, cook, grow, or do almost anything. Enjoy. One thing I haven’t been able to find was an infographic from The Onion back around 1997 titled something like “Is Mike Tyson as smart as Stephen Hawking is strong?” ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/27 "2012-09-19T16:14:44Z")
\*a downloadable version of ‘Way Down South’, from the movie, ‘My Cousin Vinny’, by somebody and the Fabulous Thunderbirds, I think. Really wanted it to add to a mixed CD I was making, could not find it anywhere. \*I was just telling someone I know in publishing that someone/anyone, (not really, my preference would be the authours of, ‘Hot, Sour, Salty, Sweet’!), should compile a photo index of Chinese/Asian vegetables. I need to know; what to look for when I buy it, which part I use, how I might cook it, what it might be in, what it’s called, (in Chinese/Other Asian language and in English too). And, as long as I’m dreaming, I want the same for exotic fruit as well. I’d equally be happy to find such a thing on line. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/28 "2012-09-19T16:16:35Z")
Extended footage of Omaha horror movie hostess Macabra, who worked for WOWT in the 1980s. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/29 "2012-09-19T16:20:14Z")
Despite what you young whippersnappers might think, the Internet is not all that old and there are tons of things you cannot find. For example, older, more obscure, books, magazines, research papers, newspapers, photos, recordings, films, etc. All of this stuff has to be posted online by someone, and often it is not worth the time to do so, or the originals are long since lost, or the few people who still have them are not savvy enough, or want to, put that info online. So yeah, I can find whatever I want to know about the Kardashians (and I don’t want to know zip about them), but lots of things have never been scanned/submitted to any online site and you would need to go to some physical location to find them, if they still exist. Even today, there are pockets of the world that have little or no internet access, and you cannot find much about them today, let alone 5, 10 or 20 years ago. The Internet is a great source of info, but by no means does it have everything you would ever need/want to find. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/30 "2012-09-19T16:28:26Z")
My long-lost half sister. Advice specifically for women on shaving with a double-edged razor. ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/31 "2012-09-19T19:14:16Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > I have never found a [Sears Jet Propelled Glider from the 1960s](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Vf9cgYA4CxY/SVLpHlIcvMI/AAAAAAAAG-Y/S8MKpaDx1U0/s400/Whoosh!.jpg) for sale. Do you have a real link? I’d like to read something about it, not just look at a picture. (ETA: At least this time I’m not just being snarky about hotlinking; I’d really like to see the post.) ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/32 "2012-09-19T19:30:21Z")
A copy of a surreal cartoon I remember from when I was little: a girl daydreaming about the cracks in the walls of her room. She teams up with a camel, monkey, and hen, and ultimately faces down the Crack Monster. [This blog](http://tailotherat.blogspot.com/search/label/The%20Crack%20Monster) has the best information I’ve ever found about it, which is basically that the artist is reclusive and doesn’t want the cartoon to ever see the light of day. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/33 "2012-09-19T19:33:42Z")
The full text of US Copyright #PAu000469609, 1983. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/34 "2012-09-19T19:55:48Z")
> [@rjk](#): > > Do you have a real link? I’d like to read something about it, not just look at a picture) The Jet Glider image is from the the [1966 Sears Christmas Catalog](http://www.wishbookweb.com/1966_Sears_Wishbook/pages/1966_SearsChristmas_Page480.htm). I got one from Santa that year, got another couple as replacements (the plastic body was pretty fragile and the wings were made of thin styrofoam). I haven’t seen them since. It was a really cool toy and it really did glide a long way. There was a rubber bladder inside the fuselage, that you filled up with the “Zoom” gas. You put a finger over the filling nozzle and gave the glider a good toss. It would shoot up pretty high and then glide back to earth a good distance away. Even though we stood in the middle of [this playground](https://maps.google.com/maps?ll=32.826706,-117.170434&spn=0.004858,0.004823&gl=us&t=k&z=18), the thing would often end up on some neighbor’s roof. The nose cone was a soft foam that was only marginally effective in protecting against rough landings. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/35 "2012-09-19T20:06:54Z")
a life. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/36 "2012-09-19T21:07:18Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > It was a really cool toy and it really did glide a long way. There was a rubber bladder inside the fuselage, that you filled up with the “Zoom” gas. You put a finger over the filling nozzle and gave the glider a good toss. It would shoot up pretty high and then glide back to earth a good distance away. Was the “zoom” gas just compressed air? ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/37 "2012-09-19T21:54:58Z")
Thanks, **blondebear**. I knew it looked familiar, but had no idea where (or if) I’d seen it before. I never had one, since I was past the age by 1966, but it’s still cool. **Musicat** , I’ll bet it _was_ just compressed air. You can still get that in small cans to blow the dust out of keyboards and such. So you could build your own out of a cheap model plane, a balloon, and some plastic fittings. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2012, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/38 "2012-09-19T23:12:49Z")
> [@rjk](#): > > **Musicat** , I’ll bet it _was_ just compressed air. You can still get that in small cans to blow the dust out of keyboards and such. So you could build your own out of a cheap model plane, a balloon, and some plastic fittings. And it would make mailing the “gas” safer. ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2012, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/39 "2012-09-20T00:01:45Z")
> [@rjk](#): > > **Musicat** , I’ll bet it _was_ just compressed air. You can still get that in small cans to blow the dust out of keyboards and such. So you could build your own out of a cheap model plane, a balloon, and some plastic fittings. To clarify, this cannrd “air” is typically a short fluorocarbon. ---
**Author:** ![suranyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@suranyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/suranyi)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2012, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121/40 "2012-09-20T00:03:51Z")
> [@simster](#): > > a life. a wife [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-can-you-not-find-on-the-internet/635121.md?page=3)