# What Christmas standard do you not want to hear any more? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 6, 2016, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056 "2016-12-06T22:17:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/141 "2016-12-12T16:34:32Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > For all of you who hate the little drummer boy, I give you [The Annoying Drummer Boy](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36Hhj9bh-WQ) > > But here we are at three a.m. > With Ringo Starr of Bethlehem > > I just love that line. Loved it! Thank you! ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/142 "2016-12-12T16:43:26Z")
> [@GrumpyBunny](#): > > I was working in a record store (remember record stores?) when that album came out, and the damn cassette was in heavy rotation until there was an accident that rendered the cassette unplayable. Suspicious! > [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > _Do You Hear What I Hear_ has to be the suckiest song ever. It goes beyond bad holiday songs. My version: Said the cat to the people everywhere Do you see what I have? Underneath my tail everyone Do you see what I have? It’s pink, it’s pink And it doesn’t stink Cause I wash it with my-y tongue! Cause I wash it with my-y tongue. ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/143 "2016-12-12T18:32:51Z")
Elvis’s version of _Blue Christmas._ It’s the background singers. ---
**Author:** ![Cartoonacy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/848f3c/32.png) [@Cartoonacy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartoonacy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/144 "2016-12-12T22:34:51Z")
Every year, I hope I can get through the season without hearing “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.” Once or twice I actually succeeded. Not this year, though. ---
**Author:** ![Cartoonacy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/848f3c/32.png) [@Cartoonacy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartoonacy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/145 "2016-12-12T22:36:09Z")
> [@koeeoaddi](#): > > _“So this is Christmas/and what have you done?”_ And this comes in second. A distant second, but still far ahead of the rest of the pack. ---
**Author:** ![Cartoonacy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/848f3c/32.png) [@Cartoonacy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartoonacy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/146 "2016-12-12T22:39:29Z")
> [@eulalia](#): > > I can’t believe no one’s mentioned “The Christmas Shoes”. I love Christmas music in general, but that one makes me nauseated. Forgot that one, mainly because I _haven’t_ heard it in years. If I’m lucky, I never will again. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/147 "2016-12-12T22:57:56Z")
> [@koeeoaddi](#): > > _“So this is Christmas/and what have you done?”_ > > Nothing important. Fuck you. > > I love Lennon, too, but not this sanctimonious drone-fest of a song. I’ve always heard the John & Yoko original before; this year I’ve heard a sanitized cover version that eliminates that commie “War is over” stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/148 "2016-12-12T22:59:20Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > No novelty songs, please-Just the ones you hear every year on the radio. > > For me, it’s Madonna’s sterile version of “Santa Baby”. I much prefer [Eartha Kitt’s version.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFMyF9fDKzE) That would be all of them. I get so incredibly sick and tired of hearing christmas music everywhere that I almost wish I had a cabin in the woods that I could hole up in until January. And whoever wrote Jingle Bell Rock and Rocking Around The Christmas Tree should be taken out and horsewhipped. If he’s dead, he should be dug up and horsewhipped. ---
**Author:** ![california\_jobcase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@california\_jobcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/california_jobcase)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/149 "2016-12-12T23:12:54Z")
I hate Michael McDonald singing “Deck The Halls/Jingle Bells.” I suppose he’s trying to be all soulful or something, but he just sounds like a drunken skid-row bum. (Oh, and he ruined the Doobie Brothers!) ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2016, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/150 "2016-12-12T23:47:44Z")
> [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](#): > > I’ve always heard the John & Yoko original before; this year I’ve heard a sanitized cover version that eliminates that commie “War is over” stuff. It’s bad enough being seasonally hectored by John and Yoko, now you’re telling me there’s a cheery Longines Symphonette version? Yeeeesh. ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/151 "2016-12-13T02:05:22Z")
Ava Maria they play it every Christmas. Yuck. I usually turn the volume off until it’s over. It’s like the singer is getting poked with a hot iron. ---
**Author:** ![TheInimitableMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@TheInimitableMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheInimitableMaven)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/152 "2016-12-13T02:13:50Z")
Four pages in, and I can’t believe I am the first one (AFAIK) to nominate “The Christmas Song” alias “Chestnuts Roasting Over An Open Fire”. This has got to be the king daddy of the most overplayed, most covered pablum EVER. Back when I actually used to listen to the seasonal stations on XM (via DirecTV when they carried it) and Music Choice, I swore that “The Christmas Song” received airplay at least four-five times an hour. And if I’m doing my math right, that was over 100-200 different versions of Chestnuts I heard before I finally wised up and relied upon my own personal crap-free (at least to me 😛 ) holiday playlist for my seasonal fix. My other nomination, and another one I am amazed hasn’t been said yet, is “My Grown-Up Christmas List”. Said stations played it to the point of nausea too, and it’s got to be one of the most damn preachy things I’ve ever heard…who on Earth wants to hear anything remotely ‘preachy’, at least in their music, at Christmas? I almost wonder if Alan Alda may have wrote it…it certainly sounds like something he would have written, especially and particularly with the ‘No more war!’ lines in it. I also have to close with another vote for “Christmas Shoes”…which honestly should be the de facto ‘winner’ of this thread. I’ve been quite thankful to have been spared of this utter tripe, even when I listened to those stations. But my curiosity was piqued thanks to all of the talk about “Christmas Shoes” a couple of years ago PLUS seeing/hearing the Patton Oswalt bit about the tune…so against my better judgement, I found a copy and listened to one minute of the dreaded Shoes…that’s one minute of my life I’ll never get back. o\_O And songs like that one and the above two make me have to say it…how can anyone, ANYONE listen to Christmas music, and most especially tunes like those, year round?! The only holiday music that is alright for year round listening is the entire Vince Guaraldi Peanuts/Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack (with the exception of the vocal version of “Christmas Time Is Here”, but the instrumental version is completely fine), Duke Ellington’s Nutcracker Suite, John Coltrane’s takes on “Greensleeves” and “My Favorite Things”, and the Heath Brothers’ “Our Little Town” (an interpretation of “O Little Town Of Bethlehem” that stretches the overall structure to the point that no one will realize you’re listening to what is supposed to be Christmas music)…and nothing else. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/153 "2016-12-13T03:07:56Z")
all those gag kid songs that people thought was funny in the 50s to mid 60s like the hippo song I aint getting nothing for xmas ect …I saw mommy kissing santa… can just die funny thing the grandma guy ended up hating the song for years and even wrote a song on how he didn’t wanna hear that damn reindeer song but then he softened as it became a kids song … ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/154 "2016-12-13T03:35:28Z")
**Mary, did you know?** I liked that song 25 years ago. I hate it now. All versions. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/156 "2016-12-14T18:36:27Z")
I would just like to add that any Christmas song that refers to Rudolph as “Rudy” should automatically be removed from airplay… and this needs to apply going forward for any wannabe songwriters of the future. ---
**Author:** ![CoastalMaineiac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@CoastalMaineiac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoastalMaineiac)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/157 "2016-12-14T21:49:56Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > Also, while it’s a Christmas song, “Wonderful Christmastime,” by Paul McCartney, needs to just go away, because it’s an awful song. Quoted for truth! That song is right up there with _Santa Baby_ and _The Little Drummer Boy_ for me in terms of songs I hate. ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/158 "2016-12-14T23:06:30Z")
I didn’t think I had anything to contribute, but then someone started playing “All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth” in the background. That song, plus the annoying little kid behind the voice, can DIAF. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/159 "2016-12-15T02:50:36Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > Suspicious! > > My version: > > Said the cat to the people everywhere > Do you see what I have? > Underneath my tail everyone > Do you see what I have? > It’s pink, it’s pink > And it doesn’t stink > Cause I wash it with my-y tongue! > Cause I wash it with my-y tongue. I’ve decided to blame you for the fact that my cat suddenly decided to wash his unstinky pink thing just as I read this. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/160 "2016-12-15T05:10:56Z")
> [@CheshireKat](#): > > _Christmas Don’t Be Late_ by Alvin & the Chipmunks. Thankfully I haven’t heard it in a few years. I made the mistake of listening to a version that had been “corrected” to the actual recording speed…creepy. huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuula hoooooooooooooooooop Apparently the first two verses of _Do You Hear What I Hear_ were meant to evoke images of nuclear war. Nice. That hippo song has been everywhere this year. Ugh. I could do without _Blue Christmas_ and _Baby It’s Cold Outside_, the former for sounding awful and the latter for not aging well at all. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056/161 "2016-12-15T08:31:05Z")
all of them. this is rapidly becoming my least favorite time of the year. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-christmas-standard-do-you-not-want-to-hear-any-more/774056.md?page=9)