I did have a quick look at the mysterious, and strangely beautiful, sea bat.
Well, he did, but this isn’t one of them. According to the Churchill Center, this quote has been misattributed, though Churchill wished when he was alive that he had said this first.
In the Navy, that’s becoming a Golden Shellback - assuming you endure the requisite ceremony. Goes for crossing the Equator at the International Date Line as well.
Golden Shellback?
oops, beaten to it…
I’m staying at my grandparents’ for the week and was looking at my grandpa’s wall where he hangs up all of his mementos from his tour in Korea, and I found this. (Sorry about the terrible picture quality.) Is that what you’re talking about? The text isn’t readable in the photo but it says all kinds of outlandish things about whales and sea serpents and sharks and crabs, and various other fantastical things. It’s marked “Golden Dragon.” In the lower left hand corner is a smaller card-sized copy of the same thing (appears to be authentic from the military, not made on a copying machine or something.)
Note that my grandpa was in the Army, NOT the Navy, but he crossed the meridian on a troop carrier.
Yes, that’s the sort of thing. I’d not heard of the Order of the Dragon before, but there’s Shellback (crossing the equator) and Bluenose (crossing the arctic circle) that I’m familiar with. When I was promoted from 'wog to shellback, I went through the initiation and was issued a similar certificate (suitable for framing, so they said) and an ID card sized version of the same.
AIUI cruise ships have much, much more restrained versions of the various ceremonies for their passengers.
“What did old-time sailors do for sex?”
Why would it have to be just sex? Why couldn’t they form meaningful relationships?
You know: “Arrr! Soul-maties!”
There’s a number of these commemorative certificates. While they’re not actually official, they are often entered into sailor’s service records.
I’m a Bluenose (crossed the Arctic Circle) and was inducted into the Order of the Golden Dragon (crossed the International Date Line).
Mermaids. :dubious:
SPY magazine had a investigative cover story about the long naval traditions of “rum buggery and the lash” (but concentrating on the middle one). One quote that stuck in my mind was “A submarine goes out with 100 men and comes back with 50 couples”. “Situational homosexuality” is like Fight Club - you do not talk about it.
Masturbation. I guess if you’re really, really good at it, it might be “masterbation”.
I seem to recall (though it might have been a weird dream) that Darwin recorded that on his Beagle voyage, when he made his first crossing of the Equator, the men stripped him naked and threw him in the ocean. If that doesn’t belong in a gay fantasy, I don’t know what does.
By the time of the American Revolution, British warships might be carrying doxies. You can never have too many doxies. “Mr. Winston, go below and break out a brace of doxies!”
Sounds like a variation of “Tommy Loy, the Cabin Boy”.
They say “The Navy separates the men from the boys”, but they usually leave off the “with cold seawater”.
I thought it was “with crowbars”.
I am “spellcheck free”, and proud of it. 
Not only did Churchill not say it, he was never “First Sea Lord,” either. He was First Lord of the Admiralty, the civilian president of the Board of Admiralty; First Sea Lord is an admiral’s job, roughly equivalent to the US Navy Chief of Staff.
There’s no such thing as “the admiralty” anymore, BTW; Britain modernized and consolidated such matters in 1964, and the Crown holds the title “Lord High Admiral,” as Elizabeth II has for 34 years.
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
The kinky little lady
She wears kneepads to scrub the deck
And for other things quite shady!
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
Be a lucky lass
She’ll be found, sprawled on the ground
With Big Peter in 'er ----!
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
Her past it is quite murky
I want to go outside with her
But she just wants to gobble turkey!
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
The naughty little nipper
We all wear kilts cuz she can hear
The faintest sound of a zipper!
The Peg Boy, the Peg Boy
Just like the Cabin Girl
Give him a stool w’ a 10 inch post
He’ll take it for a whirl!
A lot of those lyrics one could, in theory, easily change Cabin Girl/Lady to Cabin Boy/Lady and still keep the same flow. Usually the longer this goes on the less it bothers trying to stick to meter and the more upfront the obscenity gets…
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
The Saucy lil’ pup
She got boobs like cantaloupes
And her legs go all the way up
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
She likes to hang with Pirates
They think they her bestest friend
But she got one that vibrates
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
Be wobblin’ fer the door
Tis been 12 hours, an’ all dis time
'Er feet ain’t touched tha floor!
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
She’s actually quite limber
She puts her feet behind her ears
She’ll put a shiver in me timber
Like I said, usually meter matters less and less, even cleverness matters less, in favor of just blunt vulgarity. How filthy can you make it? But sometimes there’s a wink.
The Cabin Girl, the Cabin Girl
Wit’ mad lust she’s been peppered
She did a carrot, the captain’s parrot
Three hippos and a leopard!