# What do ADULT siblings fight over? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172 "2010-08-04T17:55:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2012, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/62 "2012-06-26T11:47:48Z")
Its the money/ stuff. And the drama-queeny shyte around and about our parents funerals. As an adult, I’d shake my head…but what I really wanted to do was loudly palm-slap their forehead and say, “OMFG! They raised us Both the same way. Weren’t You Fucking\* Listening\*???” Seriously, how old did they expect to be when they actually had to start carrying their own water? Somedays, I really think the only reason for some of those tears was because “Monthly Bailout Bank O Mom and Pop” was closed. > [@grude](#): > > “how could mom have picked YOU! to execute, you’ve always been a screwup and I own a goddamn company” …with its own private Chapter 7… :dubious: _lends use of Foreheadslap of Ignorant Behavior Disspelling, unlimited charges_ ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2012, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/63 "2012-06-26T13:45:38Z")
religion ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2012, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/64 "2012-06-26T14:27:02Z")
What my Mother told him I said about his wife. Which I didn’t, it’s just my Mother’s chicken-yellow way of criticizing without having to be held responsible for her nastiness. I don’t even agree with her. My Brother also has great diffculty talking to me like I’m an adult. He does this to all women, and I find it difficult to ignore since he’s raising five sons who will be someday unleashed upon an unsuspecting populace. It helped a bit when I pointed out that I’m older than our Grandmother was when he was born. My inability to prevent myself from attempting to teach his children basic manners. “No, you may not drop trou and pee in the middle of the yard when your female cousin is visiting.” That sort of thing. My inability to show up on time, or return phone calls within a reasonable time period. In fairness though, every one I know hates these htings about me, so it may not count under the “sibling” blanket. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/65 "2012-07-07T11:19:07Z")
My sister’s questionable taste in boyfriends/girlfriends/sex partners, her complete refusal to _ever_ admit that she’s wrong, her vehement agnosticism, her utter lack of tact, her laziness, her enigmatic attention-seeking comments, her overreaching goals (she wants to be a police officer, but there’s no _way_ she’d pass the psych screening), and money. In no particular order. And occasional petty stuff. Be that as it may, I love her, and I wish she didn’t live on the other side of the country. But I’m perfectly happy that we don’t live in the same house anymore. And you know… it occurs to me that I’ve never spelled all of this out at the same time before. Kinda cathartic! ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/66 "2012-07-07T11:35:03Z")
> [@grude](#): > > AMEN! > > Although technically I have siblings, a 21 year age difference diffuses sibling rivalry. You’d think… ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/67 "2012-07-07T14:03:32Z")
Not apologizing for raping me as a child? (Older brother) An attempt to grab mother’s money, and then a multi-page, irrational diatribe from the spouse when it was discovered? (older sister) Repeated attempts at emotional blackmail (I’ll kill myself if you don’t give me this mail), attempted bullying (you killed your son) when the black mail fails (I’ll see you in hell, brother) and mooching off mother. (younger brother) And people still ask me why I live in Japan. Just simply cutting off contact and blocking emails do wonders. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/68 "2012-07-07T14:48:12Z")
I think she’s irresponsible, selfish, manipulative, and headed towards an alcohol problem. She thinks I’m a snobby bitch who likes to rub my successes in her face. We try not to talk much. It’s better that way. ---
**Author:** ![Corcaigh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Corcaigh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corcaigh)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2012, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/69 "2012-07-08T14:28:59Z")
I have a brother who is _counts_ four years older than me. I usurped him as the baby of the family and he has never forgiven me for it. We can’t be in the same room as each other or he’ll start screaming abuse at me. The fact that I am alive is enough to set him off, so there is nothing I can do to prevent one of his _ **RAGES** _ all I can do is make sure I’m not around when he visits. My mother used to egg him on when we were younger and smile indulgently, then tell me I was lucky I had a brother. I have said repeatedly that I expect to die at his hands, be it accidentally or otherwise, if he gets the chance. ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2012, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/70 "2012-07-08T15:38:35Z")
Parental favor… Kinda. In my case, my parents decided when we were all very young that everything in the house must be harmonious and equal, no matter what. My brothers grew up and became rather bitter at each other because neither of them were recognized as excelling at any time, as that might make the other feel ‘unequal’. This bred a competitiveness between them, and once they both moved out and got married, they sniped at each other indirectly a lot. Now that my dad is near the end of his life, we have a lot of ‘command performances’ with family, and the brothers, purposefully or not, want to show how ‘well’ they’re getting along with either me or each other, which begins to become power struggles over stuff as ridiculous as which of them is doing it ‘better’. I guess in a way I was lucky; I knew I couldn’t compete for the affection of my folks for lots of different reasons, so I’m not trying to. It does, however, bug the hell out of me, not that my brothers are still competing, but that my parents really do encourage it. They talk about how -wonderful- it is that one of my brothers or the other is doing something for the family, and about how they -obviously- really get along, if only they’d realize it. No, folks, they don’t. It’s a show. And it’s not a real good one. Wow. Went on a bit there. Doesn’t help that I’m leaving for a ‘command performance’ (to show how much my brother is ‘thrilled’ about my birthday, none-the-less, something I asked my folks not to push) as soon as I’m done posting this. ---
**Author:** ![crypto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b3f665/32.png) [@crypto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crypto)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2012, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/71 "2012-07-08T17:17:37Z")
Money ---
**Author:** ![GreenElf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9de053/32.png) [@GreenElf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreenElf)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172/72 "2012-07-24T01:08:14Z")
With my siblings, it’s not fighting per se, but each sibling has to show their supposed superiority in some way, usually focused on diet and exercise since they were fat children. They’ll eat less than 1000 calories a day when we visit, and take about a half hour to consume a scoop of ice cream. They’ll spend three hours cooking “dinner” so it’s ready by 10 PM, and it will have only 300 or so calories which will take them about a half hour to consume. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-adult-siblings-fight-over/549172.md?page=3)