# What do all of your ex's new SOs have in common? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 20, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847 "2007-05-20T21:03:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/21 "2007-05-21T14:34:35Z")
Someone I know whose husband left her in a classic Midlife Crisis, dropped weight and started driving hot cars, observed that her ex’s “Trophy Girlfriends” all looked like younger versions of herself. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/22 "2007-05-21T14:35:32Z")
Neither of my last two exes appears to have dated again after we broke up. Did I scare them that much? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/23 "2007-05-21T14:36:54Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] None of them are the same gender as me. [/QUOTE] Me too ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/24 "2007-05-21T14:48:15Z")
After much thought, I finally thought of something. Three of my exes have gone back to the ex right before me, and gotten married to that person. I wonder what that means. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/25 "2007-05-21T15:06:02Z")
[QUOTE=Telperien] Three of my exes have gone back to the ex right before me, and gotten married to that person. [/QUOTE] That’s happened with two of my exes (I even got invited to one of the weddings), but those are the only two guys I know about. I have no idea what/who the rest of 'em are doing. ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/26 "2007-05-21T15:20:52Z")
With my daughter’s father, all of his SO’s since me were seriously screwed up drug addicts, strippers and anorexics. Of course, he was/maybe still is abusive. He is a great guy and one of my best friends, but he has major issues and that equates really screwed up relationships. The thing that they all have in common is that they all _let_ him beat up on them. I didn’t. They’re all also what I would call “dirts.” The kind of girls that only wear skintight blue jeans, tshirts and have the ever-present whaletail. Nothing at all like I – I tend to dress up most of the time in public (hell, I have been known to wear handmade silk saris just because). With my **VIE** (Very Important Ex – the love of my life, as it were) all the girls he has been with since me have been very mainstream, conservative and not very bright. They seem to bee golddigger types. The girl he is with now (from what I know of her) actually seems very much like me – except that she is very conservative. I like her quite a bit and she is very cute (his other SO’s were usually ok-ish, but the kind of women you just _knew_ were high-maintenance). I hope she’s the one for him, I like her… ---
**Author:** ![percussion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/43a26b/32.png) [@percussion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/percussion)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/27 "2007-05-21T15:23:56Z")
An extremely high tolerance for bullshit 😉 (i kid!!, a little!) Honestly, I’m only in touch with my last 3 relationships, not including the current one…but only two out of the three are with someone now, Both of the guys are kind of johnny plain and talls …both older than me, one significantly. Both seem like the type that can and want to be be molded into whatever they need to be for the relationship…and i think thats why they are in relationships with these people now as opposed to me. Both pulled some weird shit with the girl while I was in the relationship at the time. Pretty romantic/scum baggy :rolleyes: stuff…I guess their heart was in the right place…At the same time it makes you wonder what was going on during the relationship! oh! And both play guitar!! Well from what I gather!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/28 "2007-05-21T15:24:44Z")
I don’t have enough interest in ex-es (including ex-wife) to be able to answer the question. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/29 "2007-05-21T15:33:28Z")
[QUOTE=DiosaBellissima] As you can see, [I’m nothing](http://a146.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/64/l_c180fae76f62c1fc9da2efd3b59aade9.jpg) at all [like that.](http://a805.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/57/l_d47e0ff782e6a6c1859a9f2587201be4.jpg) [/QUOTE] I am proud to be the first one here asking- How _you_ doing? ---
**Author:** ![fisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@fisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fisha)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/30 "2007-05-21T15:42:12Z")
I tended to date guys with powerful, successful fathers. Senators, deans, CEO’s, real estate magnates, that type. Very strong trend for me. Ended up marrying the son of one. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/31 "2007-05-21T15:43:27Z")
Every single one of my ex’s has cheated on me. But every one of their new SO’s (that they cheated on me with) has cheated on them. Karma - ain’t it cool? ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/32 "2007-05-21T16:03:10Z")
[QUOTE=vetbridge] I don’t have enough interest in ex-es (including ex-wife) to be able to answer the question. [/QUOTE] Ditto. I know nothing and don’t want or expect that to change. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/33 "2007-05-21T17:09:49Z")
[QUOTE=dahfisheroo] I tended to date guys with powerful, successful fathers. Senators, deans, CEO’s, real estate magnates, that type. Very strong trend for me. Ended up marrying the son of one. [/QUOTE] That’s great, but doesn’t answer the question. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/34 "2007-05-21T17:21:43Z")
[QUOTE=DiosaBellissima] As you can see, [I’m nothing](http://a146.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/64/l_c180fae76f62c1fc9da2efd3b59aade9.jpg) at all [like that.](http://a805.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/57/l_d47e0ff782e6a6c1859a9f2587201be4.jpg) [/QUOTE] Is that what they call the “livejournal head tilt”? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/35 "2007-05-21T17:31:22Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] Of course, he was/maybe still is abusive. He is a great guy and one of my best friends, but he has major issues and that equates really screwed up relationships. The thing that they all have in common is that they all _let_ him beat up on them. [/QUOTE] I’m sorry, but a guy who beats up on women is great _how_? Edited to apologize for hijacking, but I’m dumbfounded that anyone would be “best friends” with someone who beats up his girlfriends. ---
**Author:** ![Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@Harriet\_the\_Spry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harriet_the_Spry)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/36 "2007-05-21T17:39:51Z")
Two (that I know of) exes have other SOs (one before me, one after me) who were Miss Something-or-other. One Puerto Rico, one Alabama. ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/37 "2007-05-21T17:58:46Z")
[QUOTE=lorene] I’m sorry, but a guy who beats up on women is great _how_? Edited to apologize for hijacking, but I’m dumbfounded that anyone would be “best friends” with someone who beats up his girlfriends. [/QUOTE] Would you stop being friends with a person who had a mental illness? Nah, I didn’t think so. A person can be a good person with mental illnesses and abuse issues really are akin to illness. Meh…YMMV ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/38 "2007-05-21T18:17:23Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] Would you stop being friends with a person who had a mental illness? Nah, I didn’t think so. A person can be a good person with mental illnesses and abuse issues really are akin to illness. Meh…YMMV [/QUOTE] OK, there’s clearly a lot of backstory I’m not privy to here. I’ll stop hijacking and agree to disagree. ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/39 "2007-05-21T18:51:06Z")
[QUOTE=lorene] OK, there’s clearly a lot of backstory I’m not privy to here. I’ll stop hijacking and agree to disagree. [/QUOTE] Not really so much of a backstory as we were friends for a long time before we ever dated, then we had a child together and were still very close friends. Then we had issues and his abusive nature came out – he comes from a **very** abusive childhood, so neither of us were surprised. We split because we did not want our daughter to grow up in that kind of situation and think it acceptable. He has never and (in my opinion) would never be abusive to our daughter – not that he would have much chance, he lives in the Phillipines now and I live in TN with full custody – and he is still a wonderful and kind person. Just not a great husband/boyfriend. I point out that even Jeffrey Dahmer had friends – you can be a total asshole in many respects but still a likeable and decent person in other respects. **not that I am saying Dahmer was decent, but he was apparently a likeable person** _ **not that I am comparing my ex to Dahmer, just making a point** _ \ ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847/40 "2007-05-21T19:05:21Z")
They’re all buried in a quarry near my house. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-all-of-your-exs-new-sos-have-in-common/404847.md?page=3)