# What do immigrants to the US need to be taught? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 10, 2015, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689 "2015-05-10T06:10:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Teach-me-not](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a4c791/32.png) [@Teach-me-not](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teach-me-not)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/61 "2015-05-13T06:50:45Z")
I have done this (sat in the front seat of the cab as a single passenger) in the US. 😛 It’s a common courtesy that if a friend is giving generic-you a ride, then you sit in the front seat, so as not to give the impression that you are treating them as your chauffeur. The first time I booked a cab in the US, I wasn’t sure where to sit. So I applied this logic and chose the front seat. What could go wrong? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Donnerwetter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Donnerwetter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Donnerwetter)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/62 "2015-05-13T07:23:16Z")
This happened to me the very first time I grabbed a cab in the US (at Reagan National Airport): I tried to open the right front door (like I’m used to) but the door was closed and the driver just wouldn’t let me in. It took me a few moments before I realized that the driver wanted me to sit in the back. (It turned out that there was so much crap lying on the front seat that nobody could have sat there anyway). ---
**Author:** ![Donnerwetter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Donnerwetter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Donnerwetter)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/63 "2015-05-13T08:25:48Z")
Americans say “excuse me” a lot when they pass by you in the public space, even at a significant distance. In my neck of the woods, people may or may not do that only if they had just inadvertently hit you in the head with their elbow. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/64 "2015-05-13T11:09:16Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > I recall reading David Niven’s autobiography years ago. He recounted how his wife Primula died soon after moving to the U.S. after falling down the stone steps to the basement in a Beverly Hills home. Niven remarked that no-one raised in England would expect an internal door to open directly onto a staircase. > > So a warning about internal basement doors perhaps. > [@Mangetout](#): > > Common sense is just another way of saying ‘what seems obvious to me’ - and what seems obvious to me may only be obvious because of local familiarity. > > I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a door that didn’t have some floor on the other side of it. So in England there’s generally no door between the basement and the rest of the house? Or are basement entrances all external? > [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > In a public men’s room with more than two urinals, never take the urinal next to another man unless it is the last one left. Always leave a buffer. We joke about this but it’s not a “rule” that has real social consequences. Especially in a small restroom. If there are only three urinals, it’s fine to use either one of the unused ones. Here’s one though: don’t try to engage in small talk with strangers while using a urinal. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/65 "2015-05-13T13:06:13Z")
> [@Teach-me-not](#): > > When I first landed in the US, I wish someone explained how the hot water/cold water dial worked there. Matter of fact, I still might not know. They are just clumsy and unintuitive IMO. You turn some, you get ice cold water. Turn some more, suddenly you get blasted with hot water. So every shower, I get alternately frozen and burned. I just need some lukewarm water, damnit! They don’t all work the same way. Most of us have had the experience of staying at a hotel or at someone else’s house and having to figure out the hot and cold water. I had a new hot/cold water dial installed at my house a few years ago, and called the plumber because I couldn’t get it to give me hot water. I had to call him back later and cancel, because I had been turning it the wrong way :smack: The furnace thing could be an apartment vs house issue. When I lived in apartments, I had a thermostat or controls on my heating system. I never had to deal with the furnace itself. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/66 "2015-05-13T13:10:41Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > I don’t think any of us really get it either. I don’t know why single knobs have become the rule. For some reason shower knobs in houses are perfectly clear, but shower knobs in hotels are monstrous puzzles. I have no idea why this is. Sitting in the front seat of a cab would be _so weird_. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/67 "2015-05-13T13:13:43Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > So in England there’s generally no door between the basement and the rest of the house? Or are basement entrances all external? In my admittedly limited experience, there are doors, but they open onto a small landing, not directly on the stairs. So landing, then sharp right turn, stairs. That way even if you fall through the door you land on the landing. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Angry\_Badger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b38774/32.png) [@The\_Angry\_Badger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Angry_Badger)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/68 "2015-05-13T13:28:54Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > In my admittedly limited experience, there are doors, but they open onto a small landing, not directly on the stairs. So landing, then sharp right turn, stairs. That way even if you fall through the door you land on the landing. That’s my experience too. The one time I did see a basement door that led straight to stairs, it also had a trapdoor over it, so to go down, you’d have to open the door and then the trapdoor (and also remove the coats and shoes because we used it as a cloakroom, but that’s beside the point 🙂 ) TBH, basements are quite rare in England anyway - if you ever see one, it’s almost always in an old (ie pre-war) house. If I’m in a modern house and see a random door that doesn’t seem to lead into a room, I think ‘cupboard’. I wouldn’t expect to see a flight of stairs. But then again, I wouldn’t just open a door and walk blindly in anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/69 "2015-05-13T13:29:44Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > So in England there’s generally no door between the basement and the rest of the house? Or are basement entrances all external? > > We joke about this but it’s not a “rule” that has real social consequences. Especially in a small restroom. If there are only three urinals, it’s fine to use either one of the unused ones. > > Here’s one though: don’t try to engage in small talk with strangers while using a urinal. Also, never look down. Most important, dont say “will you hold this a second?”. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/70 "2015-05-13T13:31:22Z")
> [@The\_Angry\_Badger](#): > > That’s my experience too. > > The one time I did see a basement door that led straight to stairs, it also had a trapdoor over it, so to go down, you’d have to open the door and then the trapdoor (and also remove the coats and shoes because we used it as a cloakroom, but that’s beside the point 🙂 ) > > TBH, basements are quite rare in England anyway - if you ever see one, it’s almost always in an old (ie pre-war) house. If I’m in a modern house and see a random door that doesn’t seem to lead into a room, I think ‘cupboard’. I wouldn’t expect to see a flight of stairs. But then again, I wouldn’t just open a door and walk blindly in anyway. In England is it a light “switch” meaning goes up for on, down for off, or is it a button or a knob? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Angry\_Badger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b38774/32.png) [@The\_Angry\_Badger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Angry_Badger)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/71 "2015-05-13T13:37:49Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > In England is it a light “switch” meaning goes up for on, down for off, or is it a button or a knob? Switch. Occasionally a knob if it’s a dimmer switch. They tend to be a flatter, squarer style than the US toggle type switches though: [http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/21PzkDnizGL.jpg](http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/21PzkDnizGL.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/72 "2015-05-13T14:05:35Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > For some reason shower knobs in houses are perfectly clear, but shower knobs in hotels are monstrous puzzles. I have no idea why this is. > > Sitting in the front seat of a cab would be _so weird_. Yes. Even if we had plenty of people and filled up the cab, I, as a lady, would not be expected to sit near the strange man. It’s weird like that. But then again I have only ever filled up a cab with my family, who are kind of old-school sexists. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/73 "2015-05-13T14:24:52Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > For some reason shower knobs in houses are perfectly clear, but shower knobs in hotels are monstrous puzzles. I have no idea why this is. I hate those things. I guess they’re lower maintenance than household single handle shower controls. Other things to know: Super Bowl Sunday is a national holiday Black Friday isn’t a day of mourning, it’s the busiest shopping day of the year. When you explain why it’s called that they think we are even crazier. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/74 "2015-05-13T15:33:51Z")
In my experience in the U.S., cab drivers treat the front passenger seat as their mobile office space and don’t move their stuff unless there are too many people to fit in the back. (As an aside, I don’t know which is worse: having to listen to the cabbie’s choice of radio stations or listen to his side of an endless telephone conversation.) ---
**Author:** ![PookahMacPhellimey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pookahmacphellimey/32/3175_2.png) [@PookahMacPhellimey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PookahMacPhellimey)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/75 "2015-05-13T17:57:27Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > Time expectations. That for most Americans when you’re told the party starts at 7, you’re there around 7. If it’s a dinner party, definitely, if it’s more of a drop in, maybe a little later but really, 7. People from other parts of the world might take “the party starts at 7” to mean “come around 10”. Also, if there will be food. For example, here in Italy (and I expect in quite a few other cultures) a party _always_ involves food. If not a sit-down meal, then at the very least copious amounts of finger food, enough for you to skip dinner if you want to. Some Italian friends of mine where invited to a party in The Netherlands which started around 7pm. There were fully expecting food, but there were only drinks and they nearly fainted from hunger and outrage, but this is totally normal and accepted behaviour in Holland. I don’t know about American customs, but you guys might lean to “no food bar some crisps unless it’s explicitly a dinner party”, right? ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/76 "2015-05-13T18:00:26Z")
Generally speaking if you’re invited at 7, there is an expectation there will be enough food to constitute dinner. If the invitation is early—say 4 p.m.—or late (9 or 10), you can be pretty sure you’re not getting a meal. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/77 "2015-05-13T19:39:57Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > (sorry to thread-shit, but…) > Surely there are some things that don’t need to be taught? > No matter what cultural differences you face, you can still use common sense . I too read Niven’s autobiography and his wife Primula, who’d only been in the U.S. two months at the time, died during a game of hide and seek at Tyrone Power’s huge house. The lights had been turned off while everyone hid. Primula opened what she thought was a closet door and backed into it in the dark, whereupon she tumbled backward down the stairs into the basement and died from her injuries the next day. Seems like an innocent mistake that could have happened to anyone. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2015, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/78 "2015-05-13T19:50:36Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Yes. Even if we had plenty of people and filled up the cab, I, as a lady, would not be expected to sit near the strange man. It’s weird like that. But then again I have only ever filled up a cab with my family, who are kind of old-school sexists. I hadn’t thought about it, but yeah - your dad sits in the front with the driver if somebody has to. ---
**Author:** ![Balthisar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/balthisar/32/2825_2.png) [@Balthisar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balthisar)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2015, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/79 "2015-05-14T02:09:23Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > They don’t all work the same way. Most of us have had the experience of staying at a hotel or at someone else’s house and having to figure out the hot and cold water Yup. My first night at a five star hotel in Chennai, and I had to call maintenance only to have him tell me the lever was in the wrong position. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Feldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lord_feldon/32/341_2.png) [@Lord\_Feldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Feldon)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2015, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689/80 "2015-05-14T04:10:42Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Black Friday isn’t a day of mourning, it’s the busiest shopping day of the year. When you explain why it’s called that they think we are even crazier. Retailers are trying to export Black Friday, though. It doesn’t make much sense here, so they figure it will be a spectacular success in places where it makes even less sense. Tesco in the UK is [doing it right too](http://www.theguardian.com/business/live/2014/nov/28/black-friday-uk-shoppers-fight-for-bargains-at-london-supermarkets-live), with a good helping of violence. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-immigrants-to-the-us-need-to-be-taught/719689.md?page=5)