# What do these two female actions (or signals) mean? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 12, 2004, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173 "2004-09-12T22:17:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lakai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lakai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lakai)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2004, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/1 "2004-09-12T22:17:02Z")
First one is where they just rub the area between their neck and chest. The second is where she would cover her cleavage with one hand. These things confuse me. Can someone shed some light on the situation? Oh, and while you answer that, can you tell me if guys look cool when we put one hand under our shirts and rub our stomach? If you see a guy doing that and looking at you that means they are interested. ---
**Author:** ![coffeecat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/coffeecat/32/3405_2.png) [@coffeecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/coffeecat)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2004, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/2 "2004-09-12T22:50:02Z")
> [@Lakai](#): > > Oh, and while you answer that, can you tell me if guys look cool when we put one hand under our shirts and rub our stomach? If you see a guy doing that and looking at you that means they are interested. What if we pat our head at the same time? ---
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2004, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/3 "2004-09-12T22:51:22Z")
> [@](#): > > First one is where they just rub the area between their neck and chest “It’s hot in here and I’ve got a heat rash.” > [@](#): > > The second is where she would cover her cleavage with one hand. “Get the %$@# out of the shower you little pervert!” > [@](#): > > If you see a guy doing that and looking at you that means they are interested. Normally that either means I’ve got an upset tummy or I’ve run out of antihistamines and I’m getting hives. Trust me, body language depends 95% of the time on context. There is no guaranteed way of reading women; when in doubt, ask in a tactful manner. Eyes can be a good indictor, but it can also mean there’s jam on your face (see the bit about context). Err… good luck with the ladies tonight… ---
**Author:** ![Lakai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lakai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lakai)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/4 "2004-09-13T00:19:27Z")
I’m going for what it means most of the time. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/5 "2004-09-13T01:21:06Z")
> [@Lakai](#): > > First one is where they just rub the area between their neck and chest. …Oh, and while you answer that, can you tell me if guys look cool when we put one hand under our shirts and rub our stomach? If you see a guy doing that and looking at you that means they are interested. If she’s putting her hand under her shirt, she’s probably adjusting her bra strap and is hoping you didn’t notice. Putting a hand over her cleveage proabably means she thinks someone is staring. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/6 "2004-09-13T01:27:36Z")
Typically if I’m rubbing the area between my neck and chest, I either have an itch or I’m kind of sweaty. Covering my cleavage with one hand either means “damn, forgot this shirt was low cut” and I’m trying to not flash anyone, or like **Devil’s Grandmother** said, I already think someone’s staring and don’t want them to. Seriously, the first situation is so broad as to be hard to interpret, there could be any number of reasons that a woman would rub her skin there. The second is almost certainly covering up her cleavage, though. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/7 "2004-09-13T01:34:01Z")
When a woman rubs the area between her neck and chest she’s saying: “Dontcha think I have a nice rack?” When she covers her cleavage with her hand she’s saying: “Quit staring at my hooters!” When a guy reaches under his shirt and rubs his stomach he’s saying: “Jeebus. That last beer was _way_ past it’s born on date. I’m gonna hurl.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/8 "2004-09-13T01:38:33Z")
I’ve encountered more men (on this board and off) who seem to think that there is a set of truly meaningful body language that will tell you when a woman is interested or aroused or whatever! I’ve had male friends tell me how certain they were that such and such woman wanted them badly because there were doing thus and so. Look, guys, it doesn’t exist! We women show _interest_ in a man about the same way a man shows interest in a woman - they pay attention when he talks, they smile, they behave encouragingly. Sometimes they show heightened self-consciousness (like twirling or flipping their hair), but often that’s just an indication of general self-consciousness. As for arousal, in my experience very few woman actually become sufficiently aroused in a non-sexual situation that this arousal would express itself in _any_ way physically. Things like rubbing her thighs together or licking her lips - a woman is very rarely going to get hot enough without actual contact or at least very good reason to anticipate fairly immediate contact for these actions to indicate arousal. The chances are extremely good that her thigh itches and she’s trying to scratch unobtrusively, or that her lips are simply dry. There’s really only one way to find out if a woman is interested in you, and that’s to ask her, generally by asking her out. Live with it. ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Prize](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d2c977/32.png) [@Sir\_Prize](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Prize)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/9 "2004-09-13T02:14:35Z")
> [@](#): > > If a girl fancies a guy she rubs or touches her neck frequently. She also lifts her head so that more of her neck is exposed, particularly when she is actively flirting. If you watch people at parties you’ll see them doing it. [http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A427277](http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A427277) ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/10 "2004-09-13T02:29:42Z")
Like any other animal, we do display courtship behavior. But that doesn’t mean that every little thing we do indicates something about our level of desire, nor that any particular action is unambiguous. If you’d like to read more about it, Desmond Morris’s _The Naked Ape_ is a good starting point. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/11 "2004-09-13T04:04:29Z")
In a book I read once, a fellow was pretty sure that women had a valve just above their bosoms that controlled the flow of tears. Every weeping woman he had ever seen clutched at that spot at the instant the tears started. Maybe the author was Mark Twain, or maybe it was Richard Condon. They both wrote naive guys. When you’re reading courtship behavior, remember that humans, like many other creatures, do a lot of courtship that never pans out. The fact that a woman flirts with a man doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s ready to hop into bed or sign a prenup. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2004, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/12 "2004-09-13T04:42:50Z")
When I get really self-conscious, I rub my neck and face and head a lot. It usually means I either think you’re really hot and I’m feeling ugly or that you creep me out and I want you to go away. So… what **Oy!** said. > [@Oy!](#): > > There’s really only one way to find out if a woman is interested in you, and that’s to ask her, generally by asking her out. Live with it. I’m more likely to touch _you_ if I’m really interested, casual relationship or not. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/13 "2004-09-14T17:50:27Z")
> [@Lakai](#): > > First one is where they just rub the area between their neck and chest. For me, this one usually means that I want to tear the head off of the cloths designer that decided to put little bows on the neckline of my new blouse. I’ve not worn it before and it ITCHES. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/14 "2004-09-14T19:01:22Z")
When I put a hand over my cleavage, it means I’m about to bend over to pick my purse up and I know my top is loose enough to give quite a view if I’m not standing up straight. ---
**Author:** ![Azaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Azaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azaz)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/15 "2004-09-14T21:20:52Z")
> [@Lakai](#): > > Oh, and while you answer that, can you tell me if guys look cool when we put one hand under our shirts and rub our stomach? If you see a guy doing that and looking at you that means they are interested. Funny, I’ve been looking at a lot of girls I’ve been interested in, but never done that. Sounds rather silly, at that, since there are more effective and subtle ways of doing it, too. As someone said, paying attention, listening, and just looking at a woman will sooner or later get the message through. Rub my stomach? Heh, amusing thought, but I don’t think I’ll even try it 😛 ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/16 "2004-09-14T21:30:41Z")
Actually you can tell a lot from body language. Much of it is sub conscious. Shurly there have been times you can tell someone is interested in you without actually asking "DEEERRRR…DO YOU LIKE ME!!! Picking up a girl (I assume that this is the underlying driver for this thread) is not about giving her your sales pitch for 2 hours. It’s about initiating a conversation of sufficient length to determine interest. In fact, my rule of thumb is the less talking I do the less likely I am to say something stupid. An ideal conversation should go “hi…uh huh…uh huh…un huh…you wanna get out of here?” ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/17 "2004-09-14T21:41:30Z")
[QUOTE=Lakai] can you tell me if guys look cool when we put one hand under our shirts and rub our stomach? [Quote] Actually, I always thought teenage boys were supposed to put their hands under their pants and rub their groin when interested. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/18 "2004-09-14T21:45:49Z")
The rubbing the stomach thing always creeped me out. It just seems overtly creepy and disgustingly sexual to me. I see guys doing this in bars (almost always frat boy types) and it creeps me out that they can’t keep their hands off of their bodies for two seconds and concentrate on talking to the person in front of them. Of course, I go for the chubbier type, and they usually try and keep attention AWAY from their tummies. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/19 "2004-09-14T22:04:42Z")
I recently attended a seminar in interpreting body language (for the purpose of detecting liars, but many topics were covered). According to the speaker, this area at the top of the chest represents a “heart window” of sorts that subconsciously is connected to your heart and your innermost thoughts/feelings. When we hug someone that we love tightly, we are letting them touch this window, which is subconsciously very intimate. When we “fake hug” people, we never let them touch this area, instead contact is made at the shoulders. Women often have this area exposed with low neckline shirts. This could be interpreted several ways, depending of course on the individual situation. If she is doing it strictly for fashion, she may place her hand over this area if she is feeling shy, or vulnerable. It is likely a defensive gesture. Women who deliberately expose this area in a subconscious attempt to use this “intimacy” to their advantage might cover this area when they are “hiding something”. It can also mean that the woman is feeling strong emotions and the hand is placed there to symbolically “hold in” these emotions. Naturally it is up to the interpreter to take note of context. Hope this helps some. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2004, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-these-two-female-actions-or-signals-mean/264173/20 "2004-09-14T22:28:58Z")
> [@coffeecat](#): > > What if we pat our head at the same time? That means you’re interested _and_ coordinated.