# What do they do in British strip clubs? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 1, 2005, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522 "2005-12-01T05:26:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/1 "2005-12-01T05:26:26Z")
Because apparently people want to know. > **[What do they do in British strip clubs?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=347082)** > > In the US, if you go to a strip club, there’s a practice of putting dollar bills in the stripper’s g-string. In jolly old England, they don’t have pound notes - just coins. How do you tip strippers? Do the strippers have magnetic stripe readers,... > **[Rico and the mods at large](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=347164)** > > I believe you erred in closing the thread entitled What do they do in British Strip Clubs While the question in the OP had been answered there is the possibility that someone could have come by and added to the answer. Certainly to head off any... So, let’s hear about those Scotsman. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/2 "2005-12-01T08:17:38Z")
If you thought _Thailand_ was wild, wait until you see the British “crumpet trick”… ::shudder:: ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/3 "2005-12-01T15:34:17Z")
I can tell you that in Soho, in the early 1990s, they serve you one crappy drink and then try to threaten you into paying £95 for it. I almost got into a fist fight with the “enforcer” after calling his bluff and telling him I’d LOVE to have the police called, yes. Fun times. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/4 "2005-12-01T19:13:47Z")
As mentioned in the original thread, in your average Strip Club the girls come round with a pint glass before they dance and everyone is expected to put a quid in it. It means the dance can go on without being interrupted by some lecherous drunk bloke pawing at the stripper. Of course the knock-on benefit (for the club) of this is that you need to have a large supply of pound coins, meaning that you need to buy stuff from the bar regularly in order to get change. If you want a private dance then thats a seperate fee paid for up front. I couldn’t tell you what happens in the really classy places - i’ve never been wealthy enough to go. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/5 "2005-12-01T19:15:07Z")
> [@](#): > > I can tell you that in Soho, in the early 1990s, they serve you one crappy drink and then try to threaten you into paying £95 for it. Those are the clubs set up to trap furriners and country bumpkins. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/6 "2005-12-01T19:17:16Z")
I am prepared to be amused if this thread putts along for a while and then drifts away without adding any substantive information to that already posted in the linked pre-thread, i.e., pint glass at the low-scale bars, 5 lb. notes at the upscale joints. However, by all means, if there is more information than that, let’s hear it. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/7 "2005-12-01T19:23:21Z")
Well a private lap dance will set you back about 15 quid. ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/8 "2005-12-01T19:40:47Z")
What if you try and slip them a Euro? ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/9 "2005-12-01T19:44:42Z")
My stag night (batchelor party) was at one of these places, in Shoreditch. It was a former sports bar that hadn’t even been converted - they still had the big screen and everything, but a few poles added. The girls stripping were too far away from the tables to put fivers in anything, though they did come around and try to sit on our laps (we declined, and they got shirty). There was lots of faked masturbation, and ‘private dances’ that cost about £15 were held at a table with a pole on it, with the customer sitting below, with very strict no-touching rules. The whole place smelled very badly of unwashed front-bottom, and it was totally un-erotic. And my brother got run over by a car on the way out, because he’d spotted a 24-hour donut shop over the road and, having a Homer Simpson moment, stepped out in front of an illegal taxi. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/10 "2005-12-01T21:45:33Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > I am prepared to be amused if this thread putts along for a while and then drifts away without adding any substantive information to that already posted in the linked pre-thread, i.e., pint glass at the low-scale bars, 5 lb. notes at the upscale joints. I wouldn’t be surprised. But I felt a crying need in the pit thread that need to be addressed. And you know…light one candle… Plus I’m still hoping to here about the Scotsmen. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/11 "2005-12-01T23:30:11Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > I am prepared to be amused if this thread putts along for a while and then drifts away without adding any substantive information to that already posted in the linked pre-thread, i.e., pint glass at the low-scale bars, 5 lb. notes at the upscale joints. I don’t normally take the piss out of cross-cultural misunderstandings, but jeez - those 5 lb. notes would really wear a hole in your pocket! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2005, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/12 "2005-12-01T23:44:12Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#): > > What if you try and slip them a Euro? Is that what they call it over there? ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/13 "2005-12-02T01:14:00Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#): > > What if you try and slip them a Euro? The smallest euro note is 5 € . ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/14 "2005-12-02T01:21:18Z")
Just to be awkward, we do have £1 (one pound) notes in Scotland. I can’t help you about the strip joints though. Very sheltered Celyn, me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/15 "2005-12-02T14:35:39Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > And my brother got run over by a car on the way out, because he’d spotted a 24-hour donut shop over the road and, having a Homer Simpson moment, stepped out in front of an illegal taxi. I hope this had a happy ending, because I must admit I laughed out loud at the mental image. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/16 "2005-12-02T15:40:24Z")
So why not just find out the standard tip in every country? How about Findland? Do you have to tip more because it’s so damn cold? ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/17 "2005-12-02T17:30:10Z")
> [@Celyn](#): > > Just to be awkward, we do have £1 (one pound) notes in Scotland. I can’t help you about the strip joints though. Very sheltered Celyn, me. > > 🙂 Ahh…I wondered why the Scots retained the pound note…it’s because they’re too cheap to tip the strippers a fiver. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/18 "2005-12-02T17:50:19Z")
> [@](#): > > Plus I’m still hoping to here about the Scotsmen Probably way off topic, but I was curious if anyone was familiar with the play [Kilt](http://www.curtainup.com/kilt.html) ? ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2005, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/19 "2005-12-02T22:54:38Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > The smallest euro note is 5 € . I think that may have been **kidchameleon** ’s point. :eek: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![vl\_mungo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc8723/32.png) [@vl\_mungo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vl_mungo)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2005, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-they-do-in-british-strip-clubs/333522/20 "2005-12-03T00:44:06Z")
Homer: What do they do? What \don’t\ they do? [laughs] Oh, they do so many things they never stop. Oh, the things they do there, my stars. Lisa: You don’t know what they do there, do you? Homer: Not as such, no.