# What do you do when some bully tries to force their way into your lane? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 22, 2015, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574 "2015-05-22T07:18:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/41 "2015-05-22T17:50:41Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > Do you plot revenge on people who bring 13 items to the Express Lane at the grocery store as well? No, because the Express Lane at our local supermarket is 15 items. If any of those fuckers brings 16 items, though, it’s on. And don’t get me started on people who still pay by check. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/42 "2015-05-22T18:28:15Z")
Upon viewing the video, which I earlier did not notice buried in that long story, the OP left WAY too much space between herself (?) and the Silverado. If you really want to “shut the door” you gotta get _right_ up on the next car. Even when the BMW started to horn in, you still had room to the right to move up onto the bumper of the pickup. You left a solid 4-5 feet gap, and that’s as open a window as you’ll ever get on the Beltway when there’s a backup. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/43 "2015-05-22T18:31:05Z")
Lotta fuck’n road scholars up in this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/44 "2015-05-22T18:46:46Z")
I discovered the OP also drives a BMW. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/45 "2015-05-22T19:12:38Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > Upon viewing the video, which I earlier did not notice buried in that long story, the OP left WAY too much space between herself (?) and the Silverado. If you really want to “shut the door” you gotta get _right_ up on the next car. Even when the BMW started to horn in, you still had room to the right to move up onto the bumper of the pickup. You left a solid 4-5 feet gap, and that’s as open a window as you’ll ever get on the Beltway when there’s a backup. Can’t watch the video, but that’s the secret. If the OP let the Silverado in and then closed it up, no problem. Around here if you leave lots of space, someone will take advantage of it. The more space in front of you the further back the backup extends, especially bad when people in the back of the line are blocking traffic. There is a 3 lane to 2 merge on the road I drive home on. I always let one car in, and close up so a second car can’t get in. (Many times they want to.) I drive a Prius, so some people think they can take advantage. Nope. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/46 "2015-05-22T19:20:31Z")
Let them in, let them go. If someone is being an aggressive idiot on the road, I would rather have them in front of me than behind. ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/47 "2015-05-22T19:23:08Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > It’s not just me who thinks BMW drivers are like that! [There’s some evidence that they really are worse drivers, too, it’s not just prejudice.](http://blogs.marketwatch.com/thetell/2013/08/13/bmw-drivers-really-are-jerks-studies-find/) Round these parts, you could also substitute the word Audi for BMW and you’d be reading the same article. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/48 "2015-05-22T19:25:09Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > The Broken Window Theory does not apply to these situations. When the majority resorts to aggression in order to squelch aggressive behavior, it only increases the capital of aggression. When the majority lets the aggressive little baby his occasional stupid little victory, it increases the capital of courtesy. > > Or, as Gandhi said, “and eye for an eye, and soon the whole world is the Cross Bronx Expressway.” That’s not the way it plays out. When one driver pushes in and gets an advantage, other drivers start to think they are losing out if they don’t try to push in and get an advantage also. If rudeness pays, then it pays to be rude. In the Bay Area we have fairly long exit lanes, and often cars on these exit lanes will pass lots of cars stuck on the freeway. Which is great if they are actually exiting. But what happens is that cars go to the very end of the lane, where there is a solid white line between them and the freeway proper, and push into the freeway to get a 20 car advantage. This is illegal, and every so often the Highway Patrol is sitting at the end of the lane to pull these assholes over. But mostly someone lets them in, so they do it more. And lead to a dangerous situation if they stop in front of people actually getting off. The lane is marked Exit Only, by the way If no one let them off, so they wound up frequently taking an unwanted exit, their behavior should improve. I stay in the next lane over since I’ve observed that the rightmost lane gets slowed down a lot by people braking to let the cheaters in. So I’m just an observer. This behavior has spread to city streets, where there are a lot of people who stay in the left lane of a three lane road even though they want to take a right exit, and cut over at the last minute (this is called dive bombing) in the expectation that people will let them. Missing their exit a few times would encourage them to think ahead. Their behavior is not just impolite, it is dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/49 "2015-05-22T19:34:37Z")
The chevy pick up pulling in front of you . No problem . The car behind it, you gave it space to merge in, so they took it. Most cities I guarantee you if you moved up they would of waited. Try driving in Montreal if you want to feel better. It’s let me in or we collide rules of the road. You can signal to merge into a lane in Montreal but no one will actually let you merge until you start merging, forcing them to let you in. That’s how it flies there. ---
**Author:** ![Bone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bone/32/407_2.png) [@Bone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bone)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/50 "2015-05-22T19:44:51Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > I let him in front of me, then run a search on his license plate to find his address. Then I race to his house before he gets home and ax murder his whole family. I scrawl “learn how to merge properly!” on the wall in baby blood, do an upper-decker in his toilet, and then go home feeling good about having done my part for traffic safety. TIL what Upper Decker means. I feel like I’ve accomplished enough for the day. ---
**Author:** ![yawuntz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a5b964/32.png) [@yawuntz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yawuntz)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/51 "2015-05-22T19:53:55Z")
Not a fan of revenge on the road. Sometimes it never ends. Anyway, if somebody flicks their brights on me, I just tilt the mirror up. My policy is, if somebody’s horning in out of turn, I’ll make them work for it, but not to the extent of risking a fender-bender. As was mentioned, if somebody’s really gonna be an asshole about it, I want them in front of me where I can see them, not behind me tailgating. That’s a lot of storm and stress for one car-length. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/52 "2015-05-22T20:10:31Z")
This is why you need to mount the air horn off an 18-wheeler on your car. 😃 Failing that, just let them in. One more car in front of you won’t make a bit of difference. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/53 "2015-05-22T20:14:05Z")
Let the baby have his bottle and get on with your life, it’s not worth getting upset about. ---
**Author:** ![Kimbosquee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@Kimbosquee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimbosquee)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/54 "2015-05-22T22:42:52Z")
Tl;dr? Watch this from 2:18 instead: [- YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzAiVu8Ks58&hd=1#) You guys are right, I was being an asshole too by flashing my high beams, but apparently it’s because I also drive a bimmer. I must be predisposed to being one. I did say “bright idea” sarcastically and as a shitty pun. I also did say I prefer zipper merging, but no one was doing it right this time and it made it worse. That lane is not even for merging to the right. I’ve had my share of encounters with asshole drivers and even was one when I first started driving the BMW, and I certainly don’t bitch about them all, but I have never personally encountered this and was more frustrated at myself for always letting people step on me. On the plus side I did get a front row seat to his shit driving. By the way I am a woman, but I thought it was obvious in the video. I left a large gap because the truck driver was so damn hesitant. I had to baby him/her somehow. Yeah I know about the brakes. The car has been taken in numerous times only for them to start squealing again. You know how poor a BMW’s health typically is. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/55 "2015-05-22T23:11:34Z")
I think you were delayed by about 4 seconds. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/56 "2015-05-23T02:40:14Z")
Instead of revenge, you can just play this back in your head and know that at least one day, that sort of asshole got his just due. I was driving our big truck, merging onto the freeway on an on-ramp that started out as two lanes, then the right lane merges to the left, then we all merge onto the freeway. So, of course, there are the assholes who drive up the right as far as they can before moving left, including down the shoulder if they are driving a smaller car. This day, I was in the left hand ramp lane and was just starting to move into the right most freeway lane when a semi decided he needed that lane. He may have been signalling but I couldn’t tell at that angle. Anyway, I of course gave way and since I had only barely started moving into the freeway lane, I just straightened out and moved a bit forward … … and squished a Lexus into the guardrail. Apparently, he decided to gun it as I started moving left, so when I didn’t continue to do so _and_ moved a bit back to the right, he ran out of room. When the guy behind me stopped laughing, he gave me his card in case I needed a witness for insurance. I didn’t - we didn’t even claim anything as it was the old beat up truck and he hadn’t done any actual new damage. But some days, damn I wish I had that on video to play back! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![2gigch1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/2gigch1/32/3313_2.png) [@2gigch1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2gigch1)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/57 "2015-05-23T02:40:28Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > PS And is it any surprise that this person was driving a BMW? Not that assholes can’t drive anything, but my confirmation bias has clearly demonstrated that this sort of behavior is endemic among the Beamers, the Benzes, the Lexi, and for some reason the Nissan Altima drivers of the world. But maybe that’s just me (and DC in general). In DC? BMW - check. VA plates - check. Driving in Prince Georges County - check. ---
**Author:** ![Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emtar_KronJonDerSohn)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/58 "2015-05-23T03:06:37Z")
I read the thread before watching the video… And that’s it? THAT is the altercation you felt the need to write this book about? You damn near gave that guy an engraved invitation! You didn’t even yell any driving words at him! And seriously, whatever small fraction of a minute it might have cost you after you sent him a notarized affidavit of consent to merge in front of you (via registered mail, return receipt requested no less) you more than gave away by inching along in the right lane for 27 metric miles while the entire population of Chino Hills passed you in the other two lanes. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/59 "2015-05-23T03:38:22Z")
In my dazzlingly yellow Focus I assume the merger is blind because there is no way in Hell he couldn’t see it. There are many blind people on the road; two people tried to back into it in one aisle of the DMV parking lot. In my old Roadmonster wagon I like to play chicken with the small fry, but I’d break off earlier for a Silverado. They’re even bigger than my car and are driven by crazy people. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574/60 "2015-05-23T13:56:12Z")
There are different merge situations. And in heavy traffic where things slow down to a crawl, the zipper is best. BUT. Good god, people are so clueless. When it’s not congested and your moving along at 40-50 mph, just move over and keep traffic moving at speed. How can you miss these signs? - Road work ahead - Left lane closed - Another and another graphic big assed left lane closed sign - Flashing arrow lights on the back of a truck 10 feet up in the air indicating to move to the right. And then they are surprised that their lane is closed and there are cones forcing them to move to the right, now forcing a 10mph ‘zipper’ move. Just get your ass over when the signs say to, and don’t slow everyone down. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-do-when-some-bully-tries-to-force-their-way-into-your-lane/720574.md?page=4)