# What do you like on your bologna sandwiches? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** food-cooking\ **Created:** [July 20, 2025, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115 "2025-07-20T16:04:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/81 "2025-07-22T00:50:29Z")
Many times. Here it is again. - 1 can SPAM® - Sweet pickle relish - Miracle Whip Run the SPAM® through the meat grinder. (I have a hand-cranked one.) Or a food processor. Or mince it with a knife. Add Miracle Whip and sweet pickle relish, and mix thoroughly. (Mixing also helps to break up the meat.) Chill for half an hour. Best served on soft, white (Wonder) bread, but I eat it on low-carb multi-grain. Dad had to coax people to try it. Once they did, they were like, ‘Do you have any more?’ SPAM® is heavy and salty. Mayonnaise is heavy and salty. Miracle Whip is light and sweet. That’s why you have to use Miracle Whip. The light sweetness balances the heavy saltiness. Mayonnaise just wouldn’t work. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/82 "2025-07-22T00:59:08Z")
Buttering the bread prior to mustard is a nice touch. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/83 "2025-07-22T00:59:53Z")
Well, I’m having that. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/85 "2025-07-22T01:20:48Z")
About a year ago, for no particular reason, I bought some _Russian_ bologna. It was called doktorskaya. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/86 "2025-07-22T01:23:26Z")
Just a light shaving of white truffles for me. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/88 "2025-07-22T16:22:49Z")
I’ve had expensive mortadella, and I didn’t care for it. I’m not a big fan of salami either. I just don’t like fatty meats served cold/room temperature. Grilled or fried is o.k. but still not my fav. ---
**Author:** ![anny\_m](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@anny\_m](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anny_m)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/89 "2025-07-22T16:55:23Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Have you tried authentic Italian mortadella? It’s basically high quality bologna with added grease! Literally – it’s much like bologna, but with globs of fat in it. Are you sure those were globs of fat? Because around here at an Italian deli (or Caputo’s deli counter) you can mortadella two ways. One looks like bologna but bigger, the other has pistachios in it. I’m wondering if you confused the nuts with globs of fat. While on the bologna topic, when was the last time you had ring bologna? We’d have it very occasionally for dinner when I was a kid. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/90 "2025-07-22T16:59:30Z")
> [@anny\_m](#): > > > [@wolfpup](#): > > > > Have you tried authentic Italian mortadella? It’s basically high quality bologna with added grease! Literally – it’s much like bologna, but with globs of fat in it. > > Are you sure those were globs of fat? Yes, it’s pretty standard. It may also contain pistachios or peppercorns. > Mortadella is a large _salume_ made of finely hashed or ground cured pork, which incorporates at least 15% small cubes of pork fat (principally the hard fat from the neck of the pig). > [Mortadella - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mortadella) ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/91 "2025-07-22T17:07:35Z")
Bologna & cheese, on white bread with Miracle Whip. I really liked that combination, though I just can’t see myself buying a jar of Miracle Whip these days. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/92 "2025-07-22T17:08:47Z")
Yes, all the mortadella I’ve had has pockets of fat in it. It can also have pistachio (my preference) but you can’t mix up the two. I’m with the OP. I didn’t realize so many people ate it with mayo, and I would never put mayo on it for the reasons stated. It needs a non-oily, vinegary foil. By the way, this mortadella pasta is great: > **[Fried Mortadella Pasta and Peas  | Hailee Catalano Recipes | Cafe Hailee](https://cafehailee.com/recipes/fried-mortadella-pasta-and-peas/)** > > Est. reading time: 1 minute Ask the deli counter to slice it real thick, like a 7 or 8 on the slicer (or indicate with your fingers.) ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/94 "2025-07-22T17:22:41Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > I didn’t realize so many people ate it with mayo, and I would never put mayo on it for the reasons stated. It needs a non-oily, vinegary foil. I put Hellmann’s mayo on just about all sandwiches, with specific exceptions like hot roast beef. For me the foil to a fatty meat like mortadella or bologna is (optionally) spicier, less-fatty meats like ham or salami along with it, but (mandatory!) Dijon mustard, tomato, and lots of lettuce. The mayo complements the last two ingredients. For the reasons you state, I’d never just slather mayo on a plain mortadella sandwich, but then, that’s not how I make sandwiches. If I absolutely had to have a mortadella sandwich and had no tomatoes or lettuce, I’d just put Dijon on it but no mayo. But there are a few sandwiches that are best with a minimum of added ingredients. Tuna salad sandwiches require mayo but nothing else, and sandwiches of herbed liverwurst require nothing but well-buttered bread. Sandwiches with fresh smoky garlicky kielbassa likewise generally require nothing but well-buttered rye bread or a bun. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/95 "2025-07-22T17:36:51Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > > [@anny\_m](#): > > > > Are you sure those were globs of fat? > > Yes, it’s pretty standard. It may also contain pistachios or peppercorns. Yep. It’s those great big globs of unadulterated fat that put me off mortadella for all time. ---
**Author:** ![fedman1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e495f1/32.png) [@fedman1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fedman1)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/99 "2025-07-22T17:50:49Z")
sorry, but Americans are quite aware of hot dog relish, on coney dogs, brats, even tuba salad ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/100 "2025-07-22T17:53:57Z")
What the heck is “tuba” salad? (And..do I wanna know?) ---
**Author:** ![fedman1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e495f1/32.png) [@fedman1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fedman1)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/101 "2025-07-22T18:30:43Z")
sorry, fat fingers error. I use hot dog radish rather than dill relish on tuNa salad for the mustard base ---
**Author:** ![Kron](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kron/32/12444_2.png) [@Kron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kron)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/102 "2025-07-22T18:40:33Z")
> [@fedman1](#): > > sorry, but Americans are quite aware of hot dog relish, on coney dogs, brats, even tuba salad _Some_ Americans. I never saw the stuff until I was in my mid-20s. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/103 "2025-07-22T18:41:54Z")
> [@fedman1](#): > > fat fingers error. I use hot dog radish And the hits just keep on coming! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/104 "2025-07-22T18:42:40Z")
Hot dog radish? Hmm 🤔 (I’m kidding you… 😊) ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/105 "2025-07-22T19:31:25Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > What the heck is “tuba” salad? Quick, trademark that, you know someone else will. Soon a recipe for it will pop up in my TikTok feed, I’m sure. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2025, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115/106 "2025-07-22T19:39:44Z")
The bell of the tuba is the most convenient place to toss the salad for the band picnic. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-like-on-your-bologna-sandwiches/1021115.md?page=6)