# What do you mean, "sir"?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [August 24, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353 "2005-08-24T00:14:19Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 19\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Miss\_Mapp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miss_mapp/32/369_2.png) [@Miss\_Mapp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Mapp)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/41 "2005-08-24T11:31:01Z")

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When my youngest niece was 3 or 4, she always confused me with my brother, her uncle. There is a strong family resemblance and we both wear our hair short in similar styles; I guess the other differences between a 5’4" woman and a 6’ man are not very obvious when you’re that young–it’s all just Big People.

My mother would silently laugh herself to tears whenever this little girl called me “Uncle Stevie.”

My niece did manage to tell us apart better when she got a little older. It helped that Steve grew a beard.

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**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/42 "2005-08-24T12:59:41Z")

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My husband’s nephew calls me Uncle “Caricci”, but I think he might just be messing with me at this point.

Now, my mother gets “sirred” all the time and rightfully so. In fact, my siblings, teenage nephew and I refer to these incidents as “entries in the sir diary”. One time a guy even followed her into the ladies room and I think it was because he was so sure she was a man.

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**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/43 "2005-08-24T13:11:11Z")

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One time I wandered into the local VW car mechanics to get some work done on my Beetle. The owner sort of glanced at me, and said “Whaddya want mate?”

When I replied in my customary crisp English-tainted voice that I needed him to check my _motor ve-hicle_, he took a longer look and realized that I was NOT a bloke, and that I _was_ in fact a regular customer at his establishment.

He apologised profusely, and I got a discount on the work.

I would’ve decked him if he hadn’t. 😉

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**Author:** ![Staggerlee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/staggerlee/32/3134_2.png) [@Staggerlee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Staggerlee)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/44 "2005-08-24T13:13:31Z")

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I used to get mistaken for a girl in my late teens/early twenties - I remember a particular time when an Egg-salesman in a Yorkshire market called me ‘darling’ or something before making a double-take, and in his angry confusion told me I should get a haircut! Cheeky twat. How was it my problem being a bit purty?

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**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/45 "2005-08-24T13:33:30Z")

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I have a very deep voice and get “sir” all the time on the phone. Never happens face to face, though. I’m very girly. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/46 "2005-08-24T13:45:55Z")

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If you look at me, especially from the front, I’m clearly female. I’ve got maximum boobage for my frame, and my hips were definitely _made_ for breedin’, as an old friend of mine used to say. But my voice is very deep. I don’t understand why people mistake it, however, because I definitely sound more like Kathleen Turner than James Earl Jones.

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**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/47 "2005-08-24T14:54:25Z")

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I get called “maam” on the phone more often than not. Sometimes the person is not sure and will use ambiguous phrasing until they figure it out.

Once, when I was running a till at Harris-Teeter, I had a long line of customers. As I was ringing up the one customer, I could see that the next order was brought up by a middle-age mom and her soccer-player son. When their turn came and I actually \*looked \* at them, I saw that it was a pair of lesbians. The “kid” was dressed in a soccer uniform and had a flat-top haircut. The “mom” was tall and dressed comfortably rather than all sexy and also had a rather short hairstyle. So my suburban-raised mind classified them as an archetype in which I grew up. They were actually both very pretty. Despite their attempts to butch up, they had very feminine faces.

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**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/48 "2005-08-24T15:23:15Z")

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> [@Kythereia](#):
>
> I don’t get mistaken for a guy, but I do get mistaken (on the phone) for my mom. I’m still not sure which is worse.

I’m mistaken for my mom on the phone _all the time_. Even my friends will sometimes think I’m my mom. In person I’ve never been mistaken for a guy, though from any angle I’m rather girly looking and my voice is pretty high so I really shouldn’t be. My brother, on the other hand, will be called Miss from time to time, which is hilarious seeing as he’s a 6’0 ft wrestler type.

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**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/49 "2005-08-24T15:56:59Z")

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> [@FilmGeek](#):
>
> I would guess it happens to me sixty or seventy times a year. I have short hair and I tend to dress in jeans and t-shirts, but I have really big boobs, so I’m not sure how people miss that.

You’re a girl? :smack:

In my defence, I’ve never actually seen you.

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**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/50 "2005-08-24T16:13:00Z")

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> [@jayjay](#):
>
> When I’m on the phones at work, I get called “ma’am” about 30% of the time.

If I’m calling a retail store, customer service number, etc., I’m probably called “ma’am” 75% of the time. People I know and work with don’t believe it because I certainly don’t sound like a woman (to them), but there’s something about me calling to make an inquiry about something that makes most people assume I’m female when on the phone.

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/51 "2005-08-24T16:41:07Z")

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Hoo boy.

I had short hair when I was 10, and again in college.

Mr. Neville recently saw a picture of me and my sister from when I was 10, and asked “Who’s that boy in the picture with your sister?”

There was also the incident of my picture appearing in the Washington Post.

It was getting close to winter break, so I decided to get a haircut. I didn’t drive at the time, and there was a supercuts-type place (it wasn’t Supercuts, but it was something like it- I don’t remember what it was) that I could walk to from school, and none I could walk to at home. The hairdresser didn’t speak much English, and gave me a really bad haircut. Think Bill Gates on a bad hair day.

As all college students know, you’re scraping the bottom of the barrel clothes-wise toward the end of the semester, because you’re so busy with classes that you don’t really have time to do laundry. So, one day, I wore jeans, a T-shirt, and a flannel shirt to class. This was a little grungy, even for my usual low standards of dress.

As luck would have it, _that_ was the day a reporter came to interview my physics professor for a story in the Horizon section of the Post. I ended up getting my picture taken while talking to the professor, and it appeared, in full color, in the Horizon section of the Post about a month later. When I later showed that picture to the future Mr. Neville, he said, “That’s not you. That’s a guy.”

After that incident, I started growing my hair long.

But that didn’t end it. A few months later, I was wearing a sweatshirt, jeans, and a baseball hat, because the water had been out at my apartment that morning and I get Einstein hair if I don’t shampoo and blowdry it into submission every morning. The undergrad advisor for the astronomy department came up behind me while I was working on a computer in the department computer lab, and said, “Aaron?” She said it a few more times until I realized that she meant me. I turned around, and she apologized profusely- said I had looked like him from behind.

Nobody would mistake me for a guy from in front, unless I was wearing something (like the flannel shirt) that really disguised my tits. They’re big. They’re “can’t not wear a bra” big.

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**Author:** ![Ragiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6de8d8/32.png) [@Ragiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ragiel)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/52 "2005-08-24T17:13:47Z")

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> [@Pixisis](#):
>
> When i was 18 i went to the DMV to get a motorcycle permit, wearing shorts and a tube top.
> 
> When i read my permit, i was mortified ! Next to sex, the inspector had written **M**!
> 
> my brothers had a field day …

When I lived in Tennessee, my driver’s license gave my sex as **M**. I thought it was funny, but nobody else ever noticed. I think that was a typo rather than confusion, since the picture (pink blouse, earrings, lipstick) was not ambiguous.

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**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/53 "2005-08-24T17:15:53Z")

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When I was in college, a bunch of my friends and I were at a local bar. My friend Keith had his hair cut in what might be called a page-boy bob, but not really. Also, he was rather thin. Anyway, a Marine on leave from Parris Island walked up to him, put his arm around Keith’s waist and said, “Darlin’, can I buy you a drink?” Keith turned around and said, “Sure - but my name’s Keith, not Darling!”

Well.

The Marine acted as if Keith had come at him with a knife. Started cursing, wanted him to step outside, called him a homo, blah blah blah. Jerk! :mad:

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**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/54 "2005-08-24T17:17:47Z")

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> [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](#):
>
> No one has ever mistaken my gender. It probably **hemps** to have a deep masculine voice and a beard.

So what are you smoking?

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**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/55 "2005-08-24T22:32:50Z")

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> [@Malacandra](#):
>
> **Harimad-sol** , take it from me, you are… _adequately_ boobed. 😛

Thank you.

We shall never speak of this again.

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**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\
**Post date:** [August 24, 2005, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/56 "2005-08-24T22:59:35Z")

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> [@Harimad-sol](#):
>
> Granted, I have very short hair and not the most womanly of figures, and am dressed in loose t-shirt and baggy shorts. I should be lucky, I suppose, that this is only the second time this has happened to me.
> 
> Has this happened to anyone else here?

My SO tends to have very short hair and not the most womanly of figures. She does have big boobs though (DDs) and only gets callled “sir” when they’re not obvious due to clothing or posture.

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**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 2005, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/57 "2005-08-25T22:05:38Z")

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It happened again. This time, it was a guy, and he seemed really embarrassed when he realized his mistake.

So what should I do? Start wearing skirts? Grow my hair back out? Purchase tighter clothing?

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**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 2005, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/58 "2005-08-25T22:30:05Z")

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> [@Harimad-sol](#):
>
> It happened again. This time, it was a guy, and he seemed really embarrassed when he realized his mistake.
> 
> So what should I do? Start wearing skirts? Grow my hair back out? Purchase tighter clothing?

Yes, much tighter clothing. 😉

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**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\
**Post date:** [August 25, 2005, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/what-do-you-mean-sir/318353/59 "2005-08-25T22:41:33Z")

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> [@JimSox5](#):
>
> Yes, much tighter clothing. 😉

I can just picture it.

“Excuse me, ma’am, but we would like to request that you start dressing like a dude again.”

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